Jason the Uranian

Jason the Uranian fell to earth, crashed through the window of an earth dwelling and hid under a child's bed, not to be discovered until morning when he was hungry and wanted Kraft Dinner. But this story isn't about Jason. But he's the only one who knows it and he wants you to know what really happened when you were all told they tried to dig to China.

And this is it. Brace yourselves. Three scientists suffered seizures because of it.