There's Too Much Green To Feel Blue

Peter came back home that day in a daze. He walked up the steps and entered his apartment. He didn't announce his presence, he didn't say anything, he just walked in. Sam and Lily were sitting on the couch watching tv and laughing.
"Peter!" Sam stood up when he walked in and lightly smacked his cheek.
Peter's mouth opened in slight surprise.
"You like it?" Sam asked grinning.
Peter pulled at what was on his cheek. He removed a small piece of paper.
"It's a tattoo." Sam said taking the paper from him.
"Where else can I put some on you?" she placed one on his neck, "Hmm," she surveyed his body, "There's not much room. I've seen your body, you're covered in tats."
Peter looked at Sam. She was covered in her fake tattoos. She had them all over her arms, neck and one on each cheek. Lily was covered in them too. She had on her legs, arms, neck and one on each cheek. Lily was covered in them, too. She had on her legs, arms and one on her forehead.
Sam gave up trying to find a free spot on his body and looked at his face.
"Peter, what is it?" Sam asked concerned.
"My boss died." Peter blurted out.
"What?" Sam asked half-laughing.
"My boss is dead!" he repeated.
Sam gasped and placed a hand over her mouth.
"What happened?" Sam asked.
"Heart attack. It makes sense, he was a very angry guy." Peter admitted.
"And then?" Sam asked, both hands near her mouth.
"How messed up is it that we already have a new boss?" he said.
"Very." Sam answered as she strode past Peter and closed the apartment door that he had left open in his daze.
"It's like they were expecting him to die or something." Peter said.
"Are you saying that there could be a possible homicide conspiracy here?" Sam asked intrigued.
"No, I don't think so, it was a heart attack."
"Damn," Sam said, "we almost had a mystery there and we could've played 'Law & Order'. So, what's your new boss like?" Sam asked sitting on the couch indian style.
"Um," Peter said sitting on the arm of the couch, "Nerdy."
"Ha, sounds perfect for you." Sam said lightly slapping his knee.
"I haven't met him yet." Peter said.
She smiled in response, "Well, you must be hungry. I'll get you a plate ready." she went to the kitchen.
Peter opened his arms and Lily jumped into them. He touched all her tattoos. "Have fun today?" Peter asked.
"Yes!" Lily said.
He smiled at her and patted her head. "My Lils." he said, "You hungry?"
"Yes."
"Good, go wash your hands."
Lily jumped off the couch and ran to the rest room. Peter approached the kitchen counter.
"And you go change your clothes, knowing you, you'll dirty your clothes." Sam said.
"How do you know?" Peter laughed, sitting down.
"Peter," she cocked and eyebrow, "it's Sam you're talking to."
"It won't happen." Peter assurred.
"Really?" Sam said disbelievingly, "Okay, girlie," she put her hands on either side of the counter and leaned closer, "let's make a deal. If you can manage the impossible task of not dirtying your clothes, then I grant you one thing that I will do for you."
"Anything?" Peter quizzed.
"Any one thing." Sam put up one finger, "As long as it's nothing too...vile. You know, if it doesn't involve me taking off my pants or getting on my knees or...dressing up like Ashlee Simpson or something."
"Okay." Pete nodded.
"But if I win, " Sam began, "then..." she put a finger to her chin, "hmm...I don't know. Same thing, I guess."
All right, " Peter agreed.
They shook hands.
"Daddy, I'm ready to eat!" Lily said coming in.
Sam looked at her, "Aw, you rubbed off some of your tattoos."
Lily looked at her arms, "No!" She lowered her arms, "I wanted to have tattoos like daddy." she looked at Peter, "Daddy, can I have a tattoo?"
"Yeah," Peter snorted. He leaned down, picked her up and sat her in his lap, "Why don't you introduce your boyfriend to me while you're at it."
"Okay." Lily said.
"What?!" Peter cried, looking at his daughter.
"Ha, ha, good one, Lily." Sam high-fived her.
"Don't reward her, that nearly gave me a heart--"Peter's mouth dropped open and Sam gave him a panicked look.
He put a hand to his mouth. "I mean, that nearly--"
"Blew your mind." Sam finished.
There was a weird silence.
"Let's eat." Sam said.
"You have to eat with us, otherwise, I'll just have you staring at me, waiting for me to dirty myself." Peter said.
"Okay." Sam agreed.
Sam served them. Lily went to the coffee table and began to eat immediately. Peter and Sam didn't move. They kept their hands on either side of their plates.
"Go ahead, Peter. You had a hard day, eat." Sam challenged.
"Ladies first." Peter said.
"This bet isn't about me." Sam said triumphantly, shaking her head.
Peter stared at her. Grudgingly, he lowered his fork and got some food. He was about to bring the food up to his mouth when it fell on his white shirt.
"Ha, that's got to be a record!" Sam laughed.
Peter sighed and gave a short laugh, "All right, you win." he admitted.
"Oh, don't fret, Peter." Sam said pouting her lips and pinching his cheek, "Finish eating and get dressed, I already know what I want you to do."
It was as if Sam had known the whole time that she was going to win. When he finished eating, Sam made him dress quickly. Peter was about to grab a pair of black pants and a fresh shirt from the basket of clean clothes when Sam stopped him.
"No, you have to dress sexy! Where are your p.j.'s?" she strode to his room.
"My p.j.'s?!" Peter asked, wondering if she was kidding.
He followed her into his room and watched her rummage through his drawers on the floor.
"Of all things sexy, you think p.j.'s? Pajamas aren't sexy!" Peter protested.
"No, you're pajamas are sexy." Sam said examining a piece of clothing.
"How?" Peter asked, not believing her.
She sat back on her feet and shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know, you just look good in them." she said with a straight face. She resumed her work.
Peter put his hands on his hips, "I'm not going to be sleeping with anyone, am I?"
"Geez, I sure hope not." Sam said. She looked over her shoulder and grinned, "We'll see."
"What?" Peter asked scared.
"Nothing, here." she threw him black clothing. "Get dressed, I'll wait."
Peter looked at the black muscle shirt, baggy black pants and black beanie as she exited the room. When he came out fully dressed, Sam cheered.
"Yes, looking sexy!"
"How? These are my p.j.'s!" Peter exclaimed.
"Looking sexy, looking sexy!" Lily cheered jumping up and down with her arms up.
"Lily, don't say that, you don't know what it means." Peter scolded.
"Call him ugly, then, Lily." Sam said.
"Hey!" Peter said.
Sam shook her head and waved her arms, "You're either sexy or your ugly in this world, cocoa puff. Which do you want to be?"
"What are you?" Peter shot.
Sam snorted, "I'm Sam, of course, I'm sexy."
"I called you hideous this morning." Peter said.
"You know what kind of people talk like that? The jealous and the U-G-L-Y," she pointed at him.
Peter cracked up, "Okay, okay, you got me. I couldn't think of anything to say."
"Yay." she grabbed his arm, "Let's go, hottiepants." she pulled him out the door, "You too, little hottie." Sam called and Lily followed.
"What do we need Lily for?" Peter asked cautiously.
"Nothing, we're going to drop her off with my lover." Sam answered.
"Huh?" Peter asked making that face that made Sam laugh.
"With Robert." Sam answered giggling.
Robert looked up when they entered.
"Robert, please keep an eye on her. It'll only be a few seconds. Peter and I are on an adventure."
A-again?" Robert asked.
"Please?" Sam asked again cocking her head to the side and making a pleading face.
Robert flushed. He smiled and nodded.
"Yes!" Sam cheered, "Be right back!"
She ran up the steps to the elevator dragging Peter along with her.
"So what are we going to do?" Peter asked as they waited for the elevator to come.
"Well, you know how you made me say something kinky to William?"
Peter's eyes widened.
In five seconds, Peter was standing in front of William's door.
"I can't believe I'm doing this." Peter grumbled.
"Oh, come on. It was fun, you'll like it." Sam assurred.
She stood against the same wall Peter had but she put some space between the door and herself.
"Okay, go!" Sam ushered.
"Do I have to?" Peter whined.
"Come on, trust me, you'll laugh."
Peter took a deep breath, kissed his dignity good-bye and knocked on the door. William answered the door in no time, or so it seemed like it to Peter.
"Wentz?" William said when he opened the door.
Peter took one look at him and lowered his head, ashamed. Sam placed a hand over her mouth.
"William," Peter began, not daring to look up at him.
"What's up, Mr. Nice Bod?" William said.
Sam bit her bottom lip with her teeth.
"I...I am in love with you." he grumbled, his head hung low.
"What?" William said laughing a little.
"I want to do something kinky..." he took a deep breath, "...with you."
"You're...you're kidding?" William asked.
There was a stunned silence. Sam tried with all her might to muffle her laughter.
Peter dared to glance at William and when he did, his nervousness melted into laughter. It took everything he had to keep from smiling and laughing. William was standing frozen in the doorway with his arms stiffly on his sides, his mouth was hanging open and his eyes were wide.
"Y-yeah." Peter said gathering his courage, "I wanna--give it to you good! I'm going to have you bleeding in places you didn't know you had. Then, I'm going to grab you by you're hair, throw you on the floor, rip my shirt off and--"
"Peter, stop!" Sam cried, laughing loudly.
She laughed so hard, she sank down to the floor, clutching her stomach. Peter laughed along with her.
"Huh, so that's what that feels like." William said dazed.
"Hey, I'm sorry, man." Peter said still laughing hard and holding out a hand to William, "I lost a bet."
"Nah, that's cool, man." William said shaking his hand, "You really scared me...you, you were joking, right?"
"Yeah, yeah." Peter assured, "She made me do it. I can't say no to her. You know how it is."
William smirked, folded his arms, leaned against the doorway and watched Sam roll around on the floor.
"Come on, Sam, we've bothered him too much today." Peter said, still grinning. Peter bent to help her up.
"No, no, no." William put out a hand to stop him, "Let her."
He stood there, leaning against the doorway, watching her laugh and roll on the ground.
Peter frowned. This couldn't be normal behavior. He gave William a quizzical look.
"Well, we'll just be leaving now." he grabbed one of Sam's hands and dragged her away, "See ya, Beckett." Peter called, not looking back.
Sam calmed down enough to allow Peter to drag her. She looked at William and blew him a kiss. William made a kissy face back at her. She grinned and waved bye. Peter dragged her into the elevator and pushed the button. Sam assumed fetal position and breathed in and out.
"Are you having an asthma attack?" Peter asked.
The elevator moved down one floor and then stopped and opened as a man stepped. Sam immediately sat up and scooted over to the corner. Peter looked down at her. She smiled and patted the floor next to her. Peter looked at the man's back and then looked at Sam. Sam rolled her eyes in response. With one final glance at the man, Peter sat next to her.
"Sir, can you press all the buttons, please?" Sam asked.
The man turned and looked at her curiously.
"Please?" her tone only slightly begging.
Peter didn't know if it was Sam's natural charm or if it was because Sam sounded like a little girl when she pleaded, but the man smiled and pressed all the buttons before he left.
"Now we have ourselves a little ride so we can catch our breath." she put a hand on Peter's thigh, "Have a fun day, marshmallow?"
"You know what?" Peter said nodding, "Yeah." he nodded with more confidence, "Yeah." he looked at her.
Sam grinned at him. Once again, Peter noticed the cute crinkle on her nose when she smiled.