When A Smile Hurts

(Jamie's P.O.V.)

The last place I wanted to be right now, was at school. But look where I am at this very moment.. I can't stand being here right now. It just feels like it's too much. Stuff dad's doing is just.... it's consuming every part of my mind. It's stressing me out, I know what's going to happen if mom found it.

Should I tell her?

.... No..... Yes... I dunno. Maybe I should ju-

"James!" I heard Lauren's voice call out from behind me. I shut my eyes for only a second before opening them again and turning to face my friend. "Where have you been? You missed Leidner's class and you haven't been picking up your phone! What's going on?"

I stood and stared at her. I wanted so badly to tell her, to get it off my chest and let her help me forget about it. But knowing Lauren, she would press about it, and force me to talk about it. She was a great friend, but I just needed someone who could listen.. Not talk and listen.

I smiled, as best as I could, and replied, "Yeah, just family stuff, as usual. How was your weekend?" I asked before she had a chance to say anything. She blinked, then grinned. Good, that distracted her.

I smiled as she spoke, and we both turned to walk to the cafeteria together.

"Me and Oli went out on our first, real date!"

I smiled even wider, a little shocked, but happy for them. Neither of them actually owned up to saying they were with each other, but I'm glad they are. They're right for each other.

I wonder who would ever be right for m-

"Hey, Seth!" My head jerked up and immeadiately my eyes found his. He smiled and it looked as though his cheels became red, but I wasn't too sure as he quickly looked to the floor.

My stomach did an odd turn, and all thoughts from the past few days left my mind.

"We were just heading to lunch, would you like to join is?" Lauren asked him, he glanced back up, looking from her to me, and I simply stared and gave him an encouraging smile.

I really hoped he'd say yes.

He glanced down the hall to his right, and looked at us again. "Yeah, sure."

Lauren went to his side and looped her arm through his, a habit she did with everyone. "So, tell us Seth. How was your weekend?"

I stopped for a single moment, remembering Friday when I had slept at his treehouse. He seemed to remember too when he quickly looked at me then back to the floor.

"It was fine." He said in a small voice.

I smiled. I found it oddly cute how shy he became around others. It was if the floor was so fascinating, and his limit on words was always reached.

I remembered back at the times we were alone, just me and him. He always had something to say about everything, he would always tell me his views and opinions on things, yet he was always shy.

I wondered why that was.

I followed them into the caf, and stopped listening to what Lauren was telling Seth, something about a party saturday? I didn't care too much. Went to our usual table, where Kragen and Oli were waiting and laughing about something.

"Hey," Kragen said to us all, and we all muttered our hellos. Lauren went and sat next to Oli, and I sat between Kragen and Seth. We silently watched as Kragen stuffed the slice of pizza into his mouth.

"What?" He asked, looking around the table as we watched. Everyone laughed, and I smiled.

I felt all the thoughts and feelings I had earlier coming back to me. I frowned.

"I'll be right back.'" I said, and excused myself. I had to get away, even for a second, just to clear my head.

I thought about staying, thinking that maybe being with my friends would help.

But I soon realized that there was only one person at the table that could help.

Seth.