A Retelling of Events That Never Happened.
It Was a Little Cold on the Porch Tonight.
She was crying after a few tweets that weren't at all upsetting. "I need to go have a smoke." she told her friend. "I need to talk to Ryan."
"But how can you talk to him when he's—"
"—not there, I know." She sat up. "I just do."
"What do you talk about with him?"
She shrugged. "Depends on the day. Lately just how upset I am. How he's hurting me."
"And he listens to you tell him that?"
"He has to." And she went outside with a cigarette and her MP3 player.
*
Sometimes they just stare at each other. That's what's happening tonight. She had stepped onto the porch and lit a cigarette. He had stepped out of the darkness and stood on the grass a few feet below her. He pulled a box of candy cigarettes from his pocket.
They're staring without a word while her earphones sing a slow song. 'All I feel, crawls across my skin.' Her eyes were hurt and his were sad. Finally, he spoke.
"What is it?"
"I'm getting mad at you for things I shouldn't be. Just normal things. Because you're . . ."
"I know." Ryan says as she looks away from him. "You have to do it. You need a place to put your feelings or they'll consume you." His voice is so understanding. It almost hurts to listen to.
"Why did you do this to us?" she whispers. "Why did you leave us like this?"
"I had to. It would have consumed me."
She nods and puts out her cigarette. He bites his with a crunch and walks away as she goes inside the house.
No one was with her and she knows it, but it doesn't matter if she gets to talk to him.
"But how can you talk to him when he's—"
"—not there, I know." She sat up. "I just do."
"What do you talk about with him?"
She shrugged. "Depends on the day. Lately just how upset I am. How he's hurting me."
"And he listens to you tell him that?"
"He has to." And she went outside with a cigarette and her MP3 player.
*
Sometimes they just stare at each other. That's what's happening tonight. She had stepped onto the porch and lit a cigarette. He had stepped out of the darkness and stood on the grass a few feet below her. He pulled a box of candy cigarettes from his pocket.
They're staring without a word while her earphones sing a slow song. 'All I feel, crawls across my skin.' Her eyes were hurt and his were sad. Finally, he spoke.
"What is it?"
"I'm getting mad at you for things I shouldn't be. Just normal things. Because you're . . ."
"I know." Ryan says as she looks away from him. "You have to do it. You need a place to put your feelings or they'll consume you." His voice is so understanding. It almost hurts to listen to.
"Why did you do this to us?" she whispers. "Why did you leave us like this?"
"I had to. It would have consumed me."
She nods and puts out her cigarette. He bites his with a crunch and walks away as she goes inside the house.
No one was with her and she knows it, but it doesn't matter if she gets to talk to him.