At Fault.

"Hi honey, I'm home." I yell through my apartment, my voice bouncing off the walls and into every room. "I'm sorry I'm late....we just has so many problems with the cameras." there was no noise. I looked down at my wedding ring and felt the flood of guilt come over me. It was our three year anniversary and I missed our dinner to help out with the cameras. I was a jerk for not thinking about my husband. "Sweetheart I'm so sorry....you know I love you more than everything...."

"Mehh." came from our bedroom.

I ran to the kitchen and changed in to something a little more, how should I say it. Sexy? It was maroon lace that gently caressed my curves perfectly. I pored some of Russell's favorite red wine into two glasses rimmed with black. "Russell? Are you mad at me?" I questioned sauntering into our room.

He lied on the bed face against his pillow, "Humph." A grunt. That's all I got.

I placed the two glasses on our back dresser and curled up next to him. "Sweety I'm so sorry....is there anything I can do?" I pulled myself to him and rubbed his arm.

"No, just get away from me."

"B-bu-but Russell...."

"I said get the fuck away from me." He said raising his voice at me.

"Okay....I'm sorry...I love you." I truly meant that. I'd always loved Russell. He was my life and I'd die for him.

"Yeah? Really? Well I don't love you. Not anymore. This is two years in a row Jackie. I'm starting to think you don't care about our marriage."

"No, of course I care! It's just work is crazy the other broadcasters have no idea what they're doing....I'm sorry." Could he really not love me? Not anymore? Because of my work...hearing that made me want to run to the bathroom and overdoes on my meds.

"Sure." He sat up facing the window.

I tried to walk over and sit next to him, but he pushed me away. "Russell...please."

"Don't you 'please' me. You don't give a shit about anyone but yourself. You are the most conceded, bitchiest, snobbiest, more annoying hoe that I have ever met. How the hell did I ever marry a tramp like you? I see you all over those guys at the station and even on the news. You were right when we were younger. You're not perfect and I should have left you when I had the chance." He yelled at me with streams of spit flying out of his mouth.

By now the tears were flowing like rivers from my green eyes. "I....you should have told me...I would have left if that's what you wanted. I'd do anything for you...." I choked out. I stood up and knelled in front of him, "Please forgive me, I have nothing without you. I've loved you for 10 years I can't be without you."

He glared at me, "Shut up you little liar."

Wham it hit me. His big hand across my face. I went flying into our dresser, the one glass fell and hit me creating a large gash on my face while the other toppled over on top. I looked up at him from my spot on the ground. My pointer finger touched the burning spot where he hit me and where the cut was, "How....how could you."

There was no answer, I stood up and ran for the kitchen to throw some appropriate clothes. "Good, you better leave bitch or it'll get worse."

I thought about this, I couldn't leave....I loved him, he's just upset. He didn't mean it. I climbed up the stairs and back to our room. "I won't leave. I promised you I would never leave you, even if it kills me."

"For gods sake can't you take a hint? I don't love you. I want you out of my life you annoying little whore." He hit me again and this time i fell to the floor. I sat on the ground contemplating what I should do. I was so blinded by love that I didn't see what harm I was doing myself and him. This was all my fault. I could have fixed it, I shouldn't have done what I did. I deserve this. I'm horrible I shouldn't even have Russell, he's too good for me. I should take this, its what I deserve for treating him like this......

I should right?