When I Look At You

Four days into their honeymoon in Spain found Faith and Nick standing in front of Picasso’s Guernica at the Reina Sofia museum in Madrid. The complex angles of the black and white painting fascinated the newlyweds. All of the horror that Picasso was trying to recreate was clearly capture in the painting. Faith couldn’t help but to let a stray tear fall down her face as she stared at the fascinating image before her.

“It’s so…” Nick started at a loss for words.

“Impressive.” Faith finished. “How long have we been standing here?” she asked causing Nick to look down at his watch.

“Shit. We’ve been here, in this exact spot, for over an hour.”

“You’re kidding.” She said, turning to look at him. He held up his left wrist so she could see the watch herself. “Shit.”

“Come on. Let’s grab something quick to eat and get back to the hotel. I think it’s supposed to rain.”

“Aw, is wittle Nichowas afwaid of getting wet?” Faith asked in a baby voice, reaching up to pinch Nick’s cheek.

“Geez,” Nick said, swatting her hand away only to lace his fingers with hers.

Walking out of the museum Faith looked up to the sky and noticed that the sky did look like it was going to produce rain at some point. She and Nick briskly walked through the busy streets to try to find a slightly empty café. To their luck there was one with very few customers only a block away from the hotel. As Faith grabbed a table Nick went and ordered two bocadillas especiales for them.

While he was ordering, Faith rested her chin on her hand and looked out the window. Her mind began to wander to thoughts of something that neither she nor Nick had talked about. They were four days into their honeymoon yet they still had not officially… consummated… their marriage. The past four days had been enjoyable, no doubts, because they loved being in each other’s company. Faith was ready. She was ready to reach that level of physical intimacy she wanted with her husband.

“Penny for your thoughts.” Nick said, taking his seat across from her at the table.

“Hm?” she asked, turning her head to look at him.

“What were you thinking about?” he asked, picking up his sandwich and taking a bite.

“Oh nothing,” she said, giving him a smirk. He raised an eyebrow and she laughed silently, shaking her head as she picked up her sandwich. “Absolutely nothing.”

****

The rain started to fall right as they stepped foot out of the café. They sprinted to the hotel through the downpour, laughing the whole way. Once inside the elevator, Faith stood with her back against the wall, shaking hysterically with laughter.

“Look at us!” Faith said as the doors closed.

“We look ridiculous.” Nick answered smiling over at her. There was a glint in his eyes as he looked at her.

“What?” she asked, her laughter subsiding.

“Nothing,” he said, continuing to smile. She blushed and looked down as a thought came to her mind.

The elevator dinged signaling they arrived at their floor. They stepped out hand in hand as Nick pulled the key card out of his pocket. Once inside their suite he slid off his jacket and hung it up, taking Faith’s from her. He then stripped off his shirt and Faith couldn’t help but let her eyes rake over his body as his muscles flexed with the movement. He lowered his body onto the bed and closed his eyes letting out a sigh. Faith stood against the wall and watched him with a smile. He opened his eyes and looked at her.

“Want to watch a movie?” he asked.

“Uh… sure. I just want to jump in the shower to warm up a bit.” She walked over to the dresser to grab a few things. She held them behind her back as she gave Nick a quick kiss before going into the bathroom. She shut the door and took in a deep breath.

She placed her fresh clothes on the sink counter, grazing her fingers over the lacy fabric. It was a set of lingerie that one of her friends had given her at her bridal shower. She was going to test Nick tonight and she wanted to freshen up.

As the hot water of the shower ran, starting to steam, Faith took a moment to look at herself in the mirror. She stripped of her clothing and looked, pointing out certain flaws she felt. All of a sudden she felt scared that Nick wouldn’t want her. She felt completely and utterly self-conscious.

With a sigh she stepped into the shower letting the water cleanse her body. She felt butterflies rise in her stomach every time she thought of Nick sitting out in the bedroom waiting for her. As she showered her mind wandered. She thought of the past four amazing days and how great Nick had been to her but a part of her felt like it was missing something… someone. Joe’s face appeared in her mind and she gasped, dropping the bar of soap. She let out a frustrated groan and shook him from her mind. She focused on Nick and only Nick.

****

Faith stood in front of the mirror again. Her hair was dried and blown to perfection; lingerie on; a touch of lip gloss. She couldn’t help but admit that she actually looked… sexy. One last deep breath and she had the courage to open the door. She poked her head through the opening and saw Nick’s head at turned at the noise. He was lying on the bed in just his boxers and was smiling at her. The blue light from the TV screen was the only illumination in the room.

“Hi,” he whispered.

“Hey,” she said, giving a slight wave.

“Coming out anytime soon?”

“Um… yeah. Can you do me a favor?”

“Yeah, sure.”

“Close your eyes.”

“What?” he asked giving a slight laugh.

“Close your eyes!” she said. He sighed and let his eyes close shut. She slipped out of the bathroom and slowly walked over to him. She shut the TV off and turned on one of the lamps giving a soft glow to the room.

She placed herself at the foot of the bed directly in front of Nick. Faith watched his chest rise and fall with each breath he took. She couldn’t help but smile at the subtly confused expression on his face. His fingers tapped the bedspread and she took a deep breath.

“Okay… open your eyes.” She whispered.

Nick’s eyelids lifted open almost in anticipation. His breath hitched in his throat as he looked at Faith. He had never seen her in such… little clothing. Well… a bikini of course but that was something completely different. Faith bit her lip as Nick’s eyes raked her body. Nick wanted to know what sparked this impulse. Faith wanted to know what Nick was thinking.

Nick was aware of his slight arousal caused just by the sight of Faith in front of him. He was also aware of the deep pounding in his ear. It took him a moment to realize that it was only his heartbeat which seemed considerably louder and faster. Butterflies flew in his stomach making him realize just how nervous he had become.

Faith saw the change in Nick; saw just what she was doing to him. And all she was doing was standing there. She shifted from one foot to the other and noticed her breathing had changed. It was coming faster. She wished she had brushed her teeth when in the bathroom, to her it seemed as if her breath smelled terrible.

Nick stood up and slowly walked towards Faith. He reached his arms out and rested them on her hips, slightly unsure as to whether or not he should have done so. It made her inch closer to him. He brought his face close to hers, almost kissing her but just not close enough.

Their eyes were closed, mouths open, breaths labored, hearts racing. He dipped his head in that extra half an inch and their lips connected. She raised her arms to his neck, entangling her fingers with the curls on the nape of his neck. His hands slid to the small of her back, pressing her closer to him, chest to chest so all he could feel was skin and the delicate lace of her bra.

They backed towards the bed slowly, the backs of her knees hitting the edge and he gently lowered her down. She scooted backwards so her whole body was on the bed and Nick hovered over her. The chain of his dog tag hung down his neck, the cold metal grazing the valley between her breasts causing goose bumps to rise. He brought his left hand from under her up to her torso, grazing her breast. Her arms slid from his neck to his back, feeling the muscles contract as his arms moved. He moved his lips from hers down her jaw line to her neck.

He found the hollow at the base of her neck where his lips fit perfectly. He worked his lips there while one hand stayed on her waist, his thumb tracing small circles on her hip bone. The other hand had found the courage to caress her breast through the lacy fabric. Faith let out a small moan against her will and gasped when she felt Nick’s heat pressing against her thigh. Soon both of his hands were at her breasts. He reached behind her back and after a few moments of fumbling undid the clasp of the bra. He pulled his lips away from her body and locked his eyes with hers. He slid the straps of the body down her arms, releasing her breasts to him.

The bra was tossed aside and Nick slid his hands from Faith’s stomach up to her breasts, gently massaging both of them while he kissed her again. He slid his kisses down once more to the valley between her breasts. Slowly he kissed his way to the left testing Faith. He raised his gaze to hers as if asking if it were okay. She let out another moan and soon his lips wrapped around her nipple.

Everything was new to them. The sight of each other’s almost fully naked bodies, the sounds coming out of their mouths, the smells being created, the taste of each other… it was all so different so… exciting.

Nick moved his mouth further down her body, placing gentle kisses on her stomach. His fingers slid down her curves, reaching the band of her panties. He hooked his fingers under and looked up at her, again as if asking for permission. She bit her lip and gave a slight nod and he slid them down her thighs. Again, his eyes raked her body. He felt as if he had never seen anything so perfect, as he did right now.

He hovered over Faith again and placed his lips over hers. Her arms slid down his back, reaching his waist. Her heart beat faster than she’d ever felt before, afraid it might explode. She slipped her fingers under the waist band and gently tugged, freeing him from his restraint.

Both bodies stilled. The only sound in the room was their breaths coming fast, shallow, labored. They could hear each other’s heart beating. Slowly, Nick lowered his hips. Skin touched skin. Nick looked into Faith’s eyes as he gently pushed forward, bit by bit. Faith almost forgot to breathe as he slowly made their two bodies’ one.

It was still in the room as Faith closed her eyes taking a few moments to adjust. Nick placed soft kisses on her cheeks, her eyelids, and her forehead. She pressed her hands to his chest and moved her hips gently. Nick took this as a sign to move. Starting off slowly they figured out how their bodies fit together, how they seemed to be made for each other.

Growing more and more confident with each other and with themselves they mutually started moving together in synchronization. The smell of sweat and sex lingered in the air as their breaths came faster, sharper. Their movements increased rapidly. Kisses were shared every few seconds. It was like they were soaring on a cloud higher and higher until they reached their sweet release.

Nick slowly pulled away placing one last sweet kiss on Faith’s lips before rolling onto his side next to her. She turned her body to his and placed her head on the pillow next to his. She brought her hand up to his face to smooth a few curls back on his sweaty forehead. His dog tag now clung to his neck as he draped an arm over her waist.

Together their hearts slowed to a calm and steady rhythm. Their breathing returned to normal. Their eyes stayed locked on each other. There was something especially beautiful about this moment. Nick knew he had made the right choice in marrying Faith. She meant everything to him. Faith felt almost completely whole with Nick but there was always something missing. Something she couldn’t quite put her finger on. It lingered in the back of her mind but now… in this moment… she couldn’t worry about it. The only thing that mattered to her right now was Nick. Her eyes grew heavy and soon she fell asleep there in Nick’s arms where she fit almost perfectly.