Somewhere In Between

I spent the rest of the night lying in bed, staring at the pale white ceiling, listening to the sound of running water and George sobbing-- and oh my god is that a spider!? No. Good. I don’t think I could take a spider on top of everything else.

Soon, the running water of the shower and the muffled sobs of George stopped, thanks to hushed words by Lucy. I few padded footsteps later, and it all went quiet. Annoyingly quiet. At least when there was noise I had something to distract my mind from wandering into the bad places it always goes when left unattended.
Everything is just a mess at the moment. Leaving would be the right thing to do. I’m sure Natasha would let me live with her again. At least for a while. But if I leave, wouldn’t I just be making things worse? I’d be running away, and George would probably feel that he’s pushed me away, therefore pushing him further to the brink of depression, and the ever famous ‘It’s-all-my-fault’ thoughts. Or perhaps I’m believing that I’ve had too much of an impact on this house-hold.

Just as my thoughts threatened to take me to the very precipice of all things suicidal, I heard a wooden door creak slowly closed, and the dainty footsteps of Lucy grow louder as they floated in the direction of my room.
The small *tap!* *tap!* of her knuckles knocking on my door, followed by my croaky voice uttering a quiet;
“Come in”.

The handle of my door, slowly turned as it was pushed open, allowing a sliver of the warming light of the hallway to creep in as it did. But even that was slowly suffocated as she closed the door, slowly behind her, before turning to look my way. I propped myself up on my elbows and looked at her.
“Lucy I…” I stuttered, finding it difficult to think of something to say.
She shushed me, hastily walking over to the bed and sitting on the edge next to my feet. I sat there, waiting for her to say something. But all she did was stare at me. Her eyes were wide, glistening in the few scrapes of moonlight that pierced through the net curtains. They were filled with what looked like pity. But it was the way that she stared me that I couldn’t quite put my finger on. Yes they harboured pity, but they also looked upon me as if with a ravenous hunger. Her mouth slightly parted, with only her tongue, which occasionally popped out to lick her voluptuous lips, to interrupt the darkness.

She leant forward, never removing her eyes from mine, as she began to crawl up towards me. Placing herself between my legs, and breathing her hot breath on my bare torso. I felt powerless. Unable to move as the hungry lioness, that had apparently replaced Lucy, crept upwards. I was hypnotised, like a deer caught in headlights.
“Lucy I think that I should-” I was cut off as she pushed her soft lips into my cut ones, slowly pushing me down off my elbows and onto my back. Her hands were ice cold as they caressed and lightly touched my sore ribs. My back arched as she began to plant tender kisses down my front.
“Lucy stop…” I breathed as she kissed at my pelvis, and began to unfold the front of my pyjama bottoms.
“Lucy!” I said more sternly, quickly sitting up and pushing her away. Which I immediately regretted; thanks to the searing pain in my side.

She looked up at me, her eyes now filled with hurt and regret.
“What’s the matter?” Her sweet voice asked.
“Nothing its just…” I said, stopping halfway. “It’s just not right, you know?”
“I don’t want you to leave Kyle. I don’t.”
“How do you know I was going to leave?” I asked a little surprised.
“I could see it earlier with George. You had it written all over your face. Heck, I would have left by now. But I don’t want you to. I want you to stay.” She replied
“And trying to sleep with me is your way of trying to convince me to stay?” I asked, my eyebrow raised. This didn’t make any sense. Why didn’t she just come and talk to me?
“Well… It was to give you more of an incentive, you know? Give you a reason to stay. I mean, don’t you want to?”
“Contrary to popular belief, there are times when more things are more important to the male species than sex. It’s not a calling card that others can just whip out when they want something.”
“Oh, so you don’t want this? You’d be lucky to have a piece of this” She said gesturing to her body.
“Whoa there! That’s just a little bit big-headed don’t you think? I mean sure, you’re an extremely beautiful young woman, but using your body to get what you want isn’t the best way to go about things.” I replied. What is wrong with this woman?
“Oh please! It has worked for me so far, why would it stop working now?” It was at this moment, that she said these words that I suddenly felt instantly repelled by her. Like she was a leper, and you’re doing everything in your power to avoid touching her.
“Oh so now you think you’re better than me?” She exclaimed noticing the look I was giving her. “You’re pathetic Kyle. Oh its all my fault, oh perhaps I should just leave and run away. Grow up! Stay and face your problems like a real man! Accept beautiful offerings when they’re made to you and be grateful about it!” She ranted on. Hang on a second… At what point did this entire conversation turn around and make it sound like she is the one in the right? This is so unfair!

After a couple of seconds of silence, with Lucy glaring at me. She finally grumbled
“That’s what I thought…” before storming out of the room. Well that was pleasant. Please not sarcasm.
Why is it so unfair? And since when did Lucy become so righteous and yet whorish at the same time? Nothing about one single person should be that contradictory, and oh my God Natasha was right! Again!

I lay back down on my back, and continued to stare at the ceiling. I’ve decided to stay. Lucy was right. I needed to face my problems. I can fix this. I’ve been living here for barely a month and a half, and already there’s so much drama. I needed to talk to Natasha. She has the answers. She always does. Which I hate, by the way.
I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath inwards, before slowly letting it out. I was ready to sleep. Things started to go black as the welcoming arms of sleep enfolded themselves around me. Only to find me being ripped from their embrace as the sound of the alarm clock rung through my ears.
“Oh come on!” I grumbled. Just another perfect day in the life of me.