Somewhere In Between

I rolled out of bed, wincing as I did so. Kyle was not a happy bunny this morning. Even the sky seemed to reflect my mood. A dull blanket of grey, carpeted the sky. Not allowing one narrow beam of light through. I’d like to take this apparent imagery as a sign that there is no hope for the current situation.

I didn’t bother with trying to make myself look presentable for university. An un-ironed t-shirt and jeans for me it seemed. I dragged my feet along the wooden floor, grabbing my bag as I did so, and left the flat. To endure another gruelling day of art class in university. Yay. Sarcasm was indeed intended.

It had been two days since the incident with George, and I was allowed to return to university. Which admittedly was a great reprieve from the incredibly thick and tense atmosphere at the flat. Meal times were usually quiet, the only comfort being the scrape and clang of cutlery against the plates. Both me and George seemed incapable of keeping our necks straight, and much preferred to stare at our plates. Unlike Lucy who always sat, albeit uncomfortably, at the top of the table with incredible posture and a fake, hopeful, smile painted on her porcelain face.
Other times in the flat were usually spent separate from each other. I only ventured out of my room for school or food. George either spent his time in front of the television or out with his girlfriend. Lucy on the other hand I had no idea what she got up to. One moment she’ll be keeping herself annoyingly busy around the house, cleaning, or rearranging things that didn’t need to be rearranged; the next moment she’d be off out. Gone. Living only a small sliver of her fragrance hanging in the air as proof that she was once standing in the room.

Regardless of that, things were sluggishly healing between the three of us. By that, the only example I can think of is George coughing and Lucy saying “Did you say something?” all too quickly, which resulted in George just shaking his head and earning a disappointed “oh…” from Lucy. See? Progress right?

After what felt like hours of me venting my feelings on a piece of canvas via numerous strokes (sometimes stabbing… lots and lots of stabbing) of a paint brush, the bell signalling for us to leave rang.
I slowly stood up, swearing that it was my bones creaking rather than the wooden stool, and left the classroom.
“Well… You look. Nice.” Natasha said reluctantly catching up to me. She was always first in, and last out of a classroom.
“And you can’t lie.” I replied keeping my eyes front and my eyebrows furrowed together in an un-amused frown.
“I know. Have things still not improved at home?”
“No” I was thinking about giving the example above as proof that things were improving but knowing Natasha, she’d probably humour me a little too much.
“Oh. Well at least you--” She started being cut off by my mobile phone ringing in my pocket.
“I’m sorry.” I said fishing it out, I flipped it up and raised a surprised eyebrow at the name it said on the screen.
“What? Who is it? Don’t leave me in the dark here!” Natasha said, doing the best she could to lighten the mood by appearing slightly hyper-active.
“It’s George…” I said, biting my lip nervously as I stared at the still ringing phone that I loosely clutched in my hand.
“Well answer it then” She said giving me a nudge.
“What! No!”
“Why not?”
“Well I--Uh… Because I--” I stuttered, hopelessly coming up with nothing. “I got nothing.” I sighed in defeat. Clicking the little green phone to answer.
“Hello?” I croaked and coughed before repeating. “Hello?” Dear lord I am nervous. What if he is only calling to shout insults at me? What if he’s saying good bye and that he’s going to kill himself? WHAT IF HE’S BURNING MY TOM JONES CD’S!?!?!?!? Unlikely yes. Who would want to burn anything of his? That man is a GOD.
“Hi Kyle?” He’s deep voice rumbled through the head set.
“Yes?” I replied.
“Hi.” He said nervously.
“Hi.” I repeated in mock tone of his voice.
“I was wondering if you wanted to, you know… if you wanted to” He said pausing between words, I could hear the faint mutter of an argument going on in the back ground. Someone was telling him to do this.
But all I could make out was the odd “Just do it” and “Don’t be such a wimp”
“I was wondering if you wanted to come to the shopping centre with me?” He finally spat out all in one big rush. All in this moment, I had suddenly forgotten how to breathe. He wanted me to do what? Has he just totally forgotten the last couple of weeks? Oh no… What if he really has burnt my Tom Jones CD’s and is taking me to the shopping centre to show me the evidence, and put my reaction on the big screen?
“Kyle? Kyle?” George called through the headset of the phone.
“I’m still here. Could you give me just one moment?” I asked
“Uh… Yeah. Sure.” He replied as I clasped my hand of the mouthpiece to block my voice and I turned to Natasha.
“What?” She asked looking at me.
“He wants me to go to the shopping centre with him.”
“So?”
“So? So what? What do I do?”
“You say yes”
“WHAT!? Why!?”
“You. Kyle. You. Say. Yes. To. Him. George.” Natasha said miming out various actions, pointing at the phone and me.
“Me?”
“Yes.”
“Go to the shopping centre George?”
“Yes.”
“The same George who ordered a homophobic assault on me?”
“The same George who is very sorry and didn’t mean for it to go that far, yes.”
“But what if--”
“No Kyle, he hasn’t burnt your Tom Jones CD’s” How does she do that?
“But what if--”
“And no. He isn’t going to drag you into the carpark where he and a few others can beat you to death…”
“But. What if--”
“And finally no. No he is not going to set your hair on fire.”
“How do you do that?”
“Do what?”
“No what I’m thinking and going to say before I say it?”
“I’m magic.”
“Sure, and I’m the Maharaja of Spain.”
“Spain doesn’t have a Maharaja.”
“Shut up.”
“look. Did it ever occur to you that he might just want to fix your friendship? I mean sure you didn’t know him long before ‘it’ happened, but you were friends, and on the way to becoming close friends. Maybe he’s just reaching out to try and repair that. But you have to meet him halfway. You can’t go on living like this forever.” She explained
“I could come live with you again?” I replied with a cheesy grin imprinted on my face.
“No.”
“Ugh fine.” I said, giving in, and bring the phone to my ear again. “Hello George?” I called out down the mouth piece.
“Hello?”
“Sure, I’d love to come.” I said. Instantly slapping my forehead afterwards. Was that too eager? What if he thinks I’m desperate for his friendship? There is a lot of ‘What ifs’ in my head these days. It’s not good. Not good at all…
“Ok, cool. Meet you there?”
“Sure.”
“Ok then… Bye.”
“Bye” I replied hearing the distinctive click of the phone before it was cut off, and as if reflecting that too, the sun began to pierce through the clouds as the wind pushed them aside.
“Um… Kyle?” Natasha said, snapping me from my thoughts of the odd weather we’ve been having.
“Hmm?” I replied turning my head to face her.
“Just a thought an all but; what time do you have to be their?”
“Oh, at about--” I started, my eyes opening wide as I did so. “Aw crap…”