The Bat

Once upon a time there was a young boy named Decker. Decker was 19 years old and lived in Chicago, Illinois. While walking home from school one day, a Orange Bat jumped out from behind a toaster and tackled Decker to the ground. But just when he was about to let out a scream for help, Decker realized that the Orange Bat was only licking his face, not trying to bite it off. At that moment, Decker decided to keep the Orange Bat as a pet. And on the way home he decided to name his pet Orange Bat ''aleca.'' When Decker and his new pet finally got home, guess who was standing on the front porch? That's right, it was Decker's mother, Pat. And boy was she surprised to see a Orange Bat following Decker into the yard! ''What in world is that?'' shouted Pat. ''It's a Orange Bat,'' answered Decker. ''Dah, I can see that, Decker, but what on earth is it doing here?'' said Pat. ''It's my new pet!'' answered Decker. ''Oh you think so do you?'' remarked Pat. ''I wouldn't get your hopes up. You know how your father hates Orange Bats. But, well, I suppose you can keep him until your father comes home.'' And with that Decker grabbed aleca by the scruff of the neck and led his new pet into the house--even though he knew his father was probably going to dissaprove. Once in the house, Decker and aleca played and played, that is until Decker's favorite television show, ''George Lopez,'' started. At that point Decker forgot all about aleca having an unsupervised run of the house. That is until half way through ''George Lopez,'' when Decker was brought back to reality when he heard his father shout, ''rawr!! Decker! Get your behind in the bathroom...NOW!!'' With that Decker rushed into the bathroom to see what all the fuss was about. When he entered the bathroom, there stood his father, Timmy, pointing toward the lamp. ''Will someone please explain that?'' asked his father. Then, as Decker followed his father's finger to where it was pointing, he instantly knew what his father was so upset about. There, smack dab in the middle of the lamp, was the biggest pile of Bat doo-doo he had ever seen! ''I don't EVEN want to know how that got there,'' said Timmy. ''But you had better get it cleaned up now! And you had better get rid of whatever it is that could have done such a thing!'' Well, knowing his father as well as he did, Decker knew there was no sense even asking his father if he could keep aleca for a pet. So without hesitation, Decker set out to find where aleca was hiding. After a few minutes of looking, Decker discovered aleca crouched beneath the table that Decker did his licking the wall on. ''Come on, aleca, it's time to find you a new home. And hey, don't look at me that way, I'm not the one who did the dirty deed on the lamp!'' scolded Decker. ''Thanks to you I'll never get to have my own pet Bat!! And with that Decker led aleca out of the house and down to the local Gap. They had a pet section and Decker knew the owner would find aleca a good home. So after saying good-bye to aleca, and thanking the owner of Gap, Decker walked backed home and attempted to dround his sorrows by slamming down a half dozen Mikes Hard Lemonades. But Decker's pitty party came to an abrupt end when his father reminded him about the mess he had neglected to clean up. And low and behold, midway through the clean-up, Decker suddenly became thankful that someone else was going to have to do it from now on. The End.