Dreams of Tomorrow

“Dear Mother
Can’t you hear me whining?
It's been 3 whole weeks
Since I have left your home …”

Athalya was banging her head every once in a while along with the music.
She was currently sitting in the dining room, the table was covered by books, papers and her dictionary. She was trying her best to do her homework, she had her earphones safely tugged in her ears and was trying to work on her English paper.

She remembered when she was doing her homework in the living/dining room back in France, her mother would often tell her not to listen to music while studying, but the truth was that Athalya needed music to concentrate. It might seem weird, but she just couldn’t study without music on.

She quietly hummed the song as she kept on writing.

It was Wednesday, she had gotten out of school early and was now doing her homework instead of hanging out with Jimmy, Justin, Zacky and Brian.

She had been hanging with them pretty much everyday since her birthday. Jimmy and Zacky showed up at her doorstep on Sunday’s afternoon and took her to the park to hang with the rest of the group. She had no say on this, Jimmy didn’t asked, he told her to come. He didn’t asked simply because he knew that otherwise Athalya would have turned him down.

“Athalya?”

Athalya kept on writing, completely unaware of the fact that her grandmother was trying to talk to her, and had been for the last minute.

Sighing, Suzan walked over to her granddaughter and lightly touched her shoulder, making Athalya jumped up in fright and immediately took out her earphones.

“Yeah?” she asked, turning to look at her grandmother who was chuckling lightly.

“I asked you if you had a fight with the boys…” Suzan said.

“What? No… Why?” asked Athalya, frowning in confusion.

“Because they’ve been standing outside of the door for the last five minutes, trying to decide whether or not to knock on the door…” explained Suzan.

“Oh…” said Athalya. “I just told them I had homework to do and that I couldn’t go to the park with them…” she explained.

“Athalya, you’ve been sitting there for the last three hours. Just go…” said Suzan.

“But… I’m not done yet! And I need to gather all my…” started Athalya.

“Your books won’t disappear, now go…” said Suzan, ushering Athalya off her sit and towards the hall.

“Fine, fine!” mumbled Athalya, taking her hoodie off the hanger, put her shoes on and ran a hand through her hair.

“See ya later Mamie!” she said, after kissing her grandmother’s cheek and she opened the front door, only to be face to face with Brian who was about to knock on the door.

“Oh, are you done yet?” asked Jimmy, pushing Brian out of the way and smiling brightly at Athalya.

“No, not really no… but my grandmother kicked me out and told me to go with you guys, so yeah…” she trailed off, rubbing her neck.

“I love that woman, she’s the best!” said Jimmy, giving Suzan the thumbs up as she was looking at them from the kitchen window, smiling and waving.

Athalya rolled her eyes and pushed Jimmy a little so he would start moving.

“So, we all gathered together and we decided that we were going to teach you how to play baseball…” explained Jimmy, his arm loosely wrapped around her shoulder as he was walking next to her. Brian was walking ahead, with Zacky and Justin was walking next to her too.

“And what if I don’t want to?” she asked, looking up at Jimmy.

“No options…” he replied, smiling brightly. She rolled her eyes.

“Frenchie!” yelled Michelle excitedly as soon as she spot the green-eyed girl.

“Hey!” she replied, waving.

She was getting more comfortable around them. Well, that was probably because Jimmy was taking her everywhere he went so she was more used to their presence. And he kept his promise, he was driving her and Johnny to school, and back, every day.

“So Frenchie, ready to play?” asked Matt, swinging a baseball bat in his hand, a baseball cap on his head.

“Really, I could just sit here and watch, no?” she asked, looking at the girls and then at Johnny, hoping they would help her.

“Frenchie, you’re in America. Baseball is really important here, so take that…” said Justin, putting a baseball cap on her head. “And that…” he added, handing her a bat.

“Yeah, Justin is right Frenchie, and we never know when you’ll have to go back to the land of where people eat frogs, snails & pigeons, so we have to teach you everything we know, as much as possible!” explained Jimmy.

“I can’t play, I’m going to hit someone!” she muttered, holding the baseball bat by her side, looking down at her feet.

“Hey, Zacky’s going to teach you… He’s in the baseball team…” said Johnny.

“I’m not in the baseball team Shortshit…” mumbled Zacky.

“Well, that’s what your brother told me…” explained Johnny, frowning.

“Well, the exact words are: Zacky should be part of the baseball team…” said Justin, patting Zacky’s back.

“Okay, I’m confused. If you play so well, why aren’t you part of that team or whatever it is…” asked Athalya, adjusting the cap on her head.

“They wouldn’t let me… They said something about me not being the type of guy to play baseball…” he said, trying to sound like it was nothing and that it didn’t care, but Athalya didn’t miss the sadness in his eyes.

“Okay, so basically, someone threw the ball, you hit it and try to make it go as far as possible without … alright, first just take the bat and be ready to hit the ball…” said Zacky, rubbing his neck.

Justin was the one with the ball.

“You stand there, hold the bat with both hands, like that…Over your shoulder… That’s it. Okay, now be ready…” said Zacky, patting her head. She frowned, not in annoyance but in concentration and watched attentively as Justin threw the ball in her direction.

The first try, she tried to hit it too soon…

The second one, she was too late. But she got it right on the third try.

“Not bad…” said Zacky, smiling at her. She smiled back, and gave the bat to Matt, who patted her head and she walked past him. She went over to the tree and sat down next to Johnny.

“Hey Johnny, can I ask you something?” she asked, playing with the ring on her finger.

“Sure…” he replied, looking up from his magazine, and focused on Athalya.

“Why is everyone patting my head?” she asked, confusion written all over her face.

Johnny stifled a laugh and then smile.
“If you were shorter, I’d say it’s just to annoy you, like the boys are doing to me… But I don’t think I’m being mistaken when I say that it’s because they like you…” he explained.

“Huh, what do you mean, ‘like me’?” she asked, worried.

“No, no, no! Not like that…” quickly said Johnny, chuckling. “Okay, let me rephrase that…” he mumbled, rubbing his forehead.

“Don’t think too much Shortshit, you’ll have a headache!” shouted Jimmy, before high-fiving Brian and Justin.

“That’s not nice…” mumbled Athalya, glaring at them.

Johnny shook his head. “It’s not like that Athalya…” he started, before stopping and his eyes light-up. “I got an idea… Okay… Hmmm let’s put it that way… they make fun of me, because they appreciate me, in a way, and they pat your head, because they appreciate you and want to show you some kind of affection but wouldn’t dare to hug you or any other physical contacts because they’d be afraid of your reaction and want to give you some time of adaptation…” explained Johnny, looking at Athalya, waiting for her reaction.

“So… it’s like you with the guys… they don’t hug you or whatever, except that it’s because they are afraid to be considered as gay?” she asked, after a few seconds.

Johnny’s face broke into a huge smile,
“That’s it exactly… and also they want to look badass by making fun of someone shorter and younger than them…” he added.

“I think that’s lame…” she said, crossing her arms and resting her back against the tree. “And stupid… and completely immature…” she added.

“Amen to that my friend…” said Johnny, nodding. “We’re kind of the same…” added Johnny.

“Lame, stupid and immature?” she asked, frowning.

“No, I meant… You know, we’re both new in the group.” He explained.
Athalya nodded,
“Yeah…” she whispered, looking back at the group of friends.

“Athalya, can I ask you something?”

“Sure…” she replied, looking at him.

“What does Jimmy mean when he mentions the fact that you can go back to France at anytime?” he asked, blushing slightly, feeling stupid for asking her a personal question.

“I still don’t know if I’m going to stay here or not… It’s complicated.” She said, rubbing her neck nervously, glancing at Jimmy who was ready to throw the ball. “I’m thinking about going back to live with my stepfather… He’s the only father figure I ever had. So yeah, I’m not staying here until the end of time that’s for sure…” she added, looking back at Johnny.

“I’m gonna miss you…” whispered Johnny. Athalya sighed.

“You know, I wanted to avoid things like that… I’ve only be here for like 2 weeks or something, and Jimmy, Michelle and everyone else already see me as a part of their group, which is disturbing in a way… I’m not used to that…” she mumbled.

“But I’m serious…” mumbled Johnny.

“I never say you weren’t! And to tell you the truth, I’m kinda going to miss you too… You’re the closest thing I have to a friend, which is weird in a way since I barely know you… except of course for your musical taste…” she added, smiling a little.

“Well, when you go… I’ll be proud to say that I knew a girl who ate snails, frog legs and pigeons…” said Johnny with a small playful smile.

Athalya rolled her eyes, and punched his shoulder.
“That’s not funny Johnny…” she mumbled as he kept on laughing, rubbing his shoulder.

“Having fun kids?” asked Jimmy, followed by Justin and Brian.

“We were…” mumbled Johnny, which made Athalya smiled and looked up at them.

”You’re turn to play Johnny, Gates, you’re out… and you’re staying to keep Athalya company.” Said Jimmy, before turning around and walking back to the game.

Brian rubbed his neck nervously and sat down next to Athalya.
“They kicked you out of the game?” she asked, glancing at Brian, before focusing on Johnny was about to get hit in the back of the head by Justin, she frowned.

“Kinda… not really… I was just tired to play baseball, it’s Zacky’s thing, not mine…” mumbled Brian, laying down on the grass, crossing his arms behind his head and turning his head to the left side so he could see Athalya.

“Baseball ain’t my thing either…” she whispered, frowning. Brian raised an eyebrow and followed her gaze.

“Ah… Don’t worry, Johnny doesn’t feel a thing.” He said.

Athalya’s head snapped in his direction and he froze right on the spot. Her eyes were darker than usual, and by the look she gave him, his heart should have stopped beating.

“I… uh… I mean that Justin hits like a girl, so it shouldn’t hurt Shor… Johnny too much.” He tried to explain, chuckling nervously.

“They really should stop doing that!” muttered Athalya, glaring at Justin.

”Well, if Johnny ever tries to do the same, they’ll kill him… but I think someone should teach them a lesson.” Said Brian, sitting up and rubbing his neck nervously.

“I would love too…” she replied. Brian starred at her in wonder.

“Yeah, baseball isn’t my thing… but I never said I didn’t like hitting someone… I mean I don’t like that… but when someone deserves a lesson, I’m up for a good beating.” She explained nervously.

“Oh well, I’m more into music you know… and alcohol and smokes… and sometimes drugs.” Said Brian, running a hand through his dark locks.

“I won’t ask about the last three ones but, music? I’d never thought you’d be a musician, what do you play?” she asked, glancing at him just a second before focusing on Jimmy and Johnny who were talking, along with Justin.

“Guitar… both electric and acoustic… and a little bit of piano.” Said Brian. That made him got Athalya’s attention.

“You play guitar? What do you play?” she asked, sitting up and looking at him.

“A little bit of everything, but more rock… Metallica, Guns’ Roses, Iron Maiden sometimes… AC/DC, and more…” he replied vaguely, looking at her to see her reaction. Her face fell a little.

“That’s more metal… I’m more into the lighter things… If I can say that… Like… Green Day. I love Green Day!” she said.

If there was one thing Brian had noticed about Athalya, it was the way she smiled. Her smiles weren’t real… Like, it never reached her eyes, never showed her teeth… It was more like the corner of her lips turning upwards a little. It was a nice smile, but not a real one.

So imagine his surprised when she asked him if he knew how to play any Green Day songs and he replied that he only knew how to play ‘When I come around’ and when she smiled.

She was smiling, a real one. Her eyes were sparkling with happiness, her teeth were showing, and you could see her dimples.

Her smile made Brian’s heart skipped a beat.

“No way! You really know how to play ‘When I come around’?” she asked, excitedly. “That’s like… one of my favorite songs ever. Is it hard to play?” she asked, facing him completely and turning her back to the game, just as Justin and Zacky both hit Johnny with their baseball bats.

“Not really, it’s like… 3 chords, and it’s always the same thing over and over again. I’m not saying it’s a bad thing!” he quickly added. “It’s just easier than playing Metallica…” Brian explained, rubbing his neck nervously as Athalya kept looking at him. He realized that it was the first time in almost 2 weeks that he had been able to take a closer look at her, without Jimmy freaking out about anyone being near her without him being with her.

What caught his attention were her eyes. Green, with a ring of yellow in them. Brian quickly snapped out of his bubble and shook his head lightly.
If he kept starring at her, it was going to creep her out.

“Do you know any other song by them?” she asked.

“No, I don’t think so… But I could try to find the tabs and learn how to play some of their songs if you want…” he suggested, without thinking, as his eyes were glued on hers.

“You would do that?” she asked, her eyes sparkling.

“Sure…” he whispered, nodding. “You’ll just have to tell me which songs you want, and I’ll try to find the tabs.” He said.

“Oh that’s so cool! Thank you Brian!” she beamed, making Brian smile in return.

“What are you doing?” asked Jimmy, letting himself fall behind Athalya, wrapping his arm loosely around her shoulder.

“Brian said he was going to learn how to play some Green Day songs on guitar!” she said, excitedly.

“That’s cool!” said Jimmy, nodding before shooting a glare in Brian’s direction.

“Oh damn, I should probably head back!” she said, standing up and brushing the dust off her jeans.

“You want me to walk you back to your house?” asked Jimmy, ready to get up as well.

“Nah, I can handle myself. Thanks Jimmy.” She said, patting his head, smiling. And Brian couldn’t help but noticed that it was back to her fake smile.

“Bye Jimmy, see you tomorrow. Bye Brian!” she said, waving at them and then heading towards the rest of the group to say her Good byes.

When he was sure she couldn’t hear him, Jimmy turned to face Brian.
“Okay, were you serious when you said you’d learn how to play some Green Day songs?” he asked, eyeing Brian suspiciously.

“Of course I was… Why would I lie about that?” asked Brian. Jimmy shrugged.

“I just wanted to be sure. I really care about Athalya, and yes I only know her for about two weeks. But she’s something different and I’ll beat up anyone who tries to fuck with her. And I swear, that’s also valuable for you Brian even though you’re my best friend. Fuck with her, you’re a dead man.” Said Jimmy, his face showing no hint of humor, or anything of the kind.

Brian knew Jimmy enough to know when he was serious and when he was fucking around. And he wasn’t joking.
Brian opened his mouth to speak but Jimmy cut him off.

“She invited me over to her house not 3 days after I met her, she knew I had nowhere to sleep and she proposed me a bed and some food. I barely knew her dude! Justin and Zacky know how shitty it can be at home, and we’ve been friends for years, but they never offered me to stay at their house because my parents kicked me out. She owns my respect man. She fucking owns it, and deserved it. I want her to be happy here.” Said Jimmy, looking at his best friend.

“Only three other people ever did that: you, Matt and Val.” Jimmy added. “And I know I sound stupid, but I don’t give a damn. She might be French, eat whatever the fuck she wants and speak with a funny accent, but at least, she tries to adapt. She has no family left and I don’t want her to go back to France.” He said.

“Okay, I’m done rambling now. You can laugh.” He added, crossing his arms over his chest and waiting for Brian to laugh. But he didn’t.

“Brian, it’s okay… I know I sounded corny as fuck, you can laugh now.” Said Jimmy.

“Jimmy, I told you I was going to learn some Green Day songs, and I will. If that’s what it takes to make her adaptation here easier, I’ll do it.” Brian said.

“I knew you were my best friend for something!” said Jimmy, high-fiving Brian. “Speaking of Green Day, I got something to ask you…” added Jimmy, leaning closer to Brian as he started his explanation.

**

“Dude, let her live!” said Michelle laughing.

“She should be here already…” mumbled Jimmy.

“Jimmy, she had a Math test this morning, cut her some slag. She’s probably at her locker or something...” explained Johnny.

“And where the hell are Val, Justin, Matt and Zacky?” asked Jimmy, visibly annoyed.

“Well, I agree with Jimmy, it’s so not like them to be late for lunch.” Mumbled Michelle.

“And Brian should be here soon…” added Johnny.

“FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!”

The attention of the 3 friends was caught by the shouting, coming from outside. Jimmy jumped off his seat and hurried towards the location of the fight, quickly followed by Michelle and Johnny.

“Dude, where’s Matt when you need him!” muttered Jimmy, as he pushed his way in the small crowd to get front row.

“Right here!” yelled Johnny, pointing at one of the two guys that were rolling around in the grass.

“Don’t lay your hands on her!” yelled Matt, pushing the guy off him and getting back on his feet.

“Who do you think you are to tell me what to do!” yelled the guy, getting up and pushing Matt.

“She’s my girlfriend asshole, don’t go near her ever again.” Matt snarled.

“Yeah, the blonde one, how about the new girl, that’s been hanging with the fucktard who likes to run around with his orange bathrobe?”

Jimmy clenched his fists, and got ready to interfere, but Justin and Zacky appeared at his sides.
“We tried to found you!” said Justin, out of breath.

“What happened?” asked Michelle.

“Val was at her locker with Athalya when that random dude started talking to Val, touching her and flirting with her…” explained Zacky. “She told him to fuck off but he wouldn’t listen and Matt had to interfere.”

“And where’s Athalya?” asked Johnny, trying to spot her in the crowd as Matt and the guy kept pushing each others, yelling profanities.

“We thought she went to found you.” Mumbled Justin. Jimmy slapped his forehead and pushed his way towards the fight.

“If he laid his hand on her he’s a dead man…” he muttered.

“Jimmy, stop!” yelled Zacky.

“Leave Athalya out of this…” muttered Matt, pushing the guy.

“Why do you care?” he asked, smirking.

“Just leave Val and Athalya alone and try to find someone else to flirt with…” Matt snapped, ready to loose control.

“But she seems like a hot piece of ass…” he said, smirking.

Before Matt could raise his fist and slammed it in the guy’s face, and before Jimmy could do anything, the guy was thrown to the ground.

“Va te faire foutre espèce de connard!” came a voice.

Jimmy’s face broke into a smile, before he realized that Athalya was now part of the fight.

Athalya was towering the guy, who was still laying on the grass.

“I had a bad day, don’t even try to fuck with me, I’ll kill you with my bare hands. Got it?” she asked in a low, dangerous voice.

“I…I’m…” he started, completely surprised to see the girl ready to kick his ass.

“Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with everyone! Just because I’m French doesn’t mean I can’t understand what everyone is saying about me behind my back, I have ears, and know how to use them, so please… be kind and if you have anything to say, now is the moment!” she said loudly, turning to face the crowd. No one dared to look at her, except for Jimmy and his friends.

“You’re just a band of cowards.” She spat before turning around and making her way out of the fight. Everyone stood aside as she walked through the small crowd and she headed back to the cafeteria.

She sat at a table and started eating.

“Athalya! How did you know we were sitting there?” asked Johnny, sitting down next to her.

“You left your bag here…” she mumbled, taking a bit of pizza.

“Athalya! Are you alright? Did he hurt you?” asked Jimmy, resting his head on her forehead, like she had some kind of fever. “I should go back and finish him!” he muttered.

Athalya took his hand off her forehead gently and looked at him. Her green eyes locking onto his blue ones.
“Listen Jimmy, I know you’re doing all that because you care about me, but you won’t make me stay here if I don’t want to. Nothing you can do or say will ever stop me from going back to France.” She said, still holding his hand. “I don’t belong here, it’s not my place to be. I know you’ve been trying to make it easier for me, but it’s not working. I need time, I need time to adjust to that situation. 2 weeks isn’t enough for me to deal with the last 17 years of my life. I’m sorry…” she said slowly, making sure everyone from the group heard her clearly, but all the time, she kept her eyes fixed on Jimmy, watching his face fall slowly as her words were sinking in.

“I need time…” she whispered, letting go of Jimmy’s hand and getting up. Neither Jimmy nor Athalya noticed that Brian was here too.
She grabbed her bag, swung it over her shoulder and left the table. Jimmy kept looking at her, silent, until she walked out of the doors.

**

Athalya dropped her bag in the hall, took off her shoes and hung her hoodie.

“I’m back…” she said, walking into the kitchen.

“Are you leaving to go to the park?” asked Suzan, after she kissed Athalya’s cheek.

“No. I’m staying here, I have homework and I’m taking a break from hanging with the guys, I need to think…” she said, before taking a can of coke from the fridge and heading upstairs to her room, taking her bag on her way.

Athalya was already out of the kitchen when Suzan let herself fall on a chair. She rested her elbows on the table and dropped her head in her hands.
“Why…” she whispered as Athalya’s door slammed shut.

**

It has been a little over a week since Athalya’s outburst. The first 2 days, Jimmy tried to drive her to school, only to realize that she had left early.

It was the week-end now, and Athalya was locked in her room. She was sitting on her bed, surrounded by scattered pictures, tears streaming down her face.

There was a soft knock at the door.
“Athalya? We are going to the mall…” said Suzan, through the closed door.

“Alright…” mumbled Athalya as a weak reply.

Athalya listened carefully, hearing her grandmother walking down the stairs. She heard the front door closing and the car starting. Athalya whipped her tears and tried to get up from her bed. She grabbed her CD box, and left her room, making her way downstairs. She put the box on the coffee table and then walked over to the window, from where you could see the backyard, and opened it widely. She, then, walked back to the living-room and grabbed a CD from the box, putting it in the stereo, turning up the volume so it was going to blast.

It had to be loud, it was the only way…

She needed the music to be loud, so loud she wouldn’t be able to think, so loud she wouldn’t be able to remember…

She skipped the song until it was on the right song and then pressed play.
She stood in the middle of the room, facing the window and started cracking her neck and knuckles, trying to warm up a little bit. Then she started jumping up&down, staying on the same spot.

That was until the chorus of the song started.

**

Brian was sitting on the edge of his bed, his acoustic guitar resting on his lap, softly strumming. He was trying to learn how to play ‘Good riddance’, for Athalya, until he heard loud music coming from outside.

He sighed, annoyed, and got up, walking towards his open window, ready to yell at whoever was stopping him from learning how to play a Green Day song.

He ran a hand through his hair, opened the window wider and opened his mouth to shout. That was until he noticed where the music was coming from.

A window was opened, and a girl was standing in front of her window, in her living room, jumping up & down with a hat on her head, well, at least that’s how it looked like from his bedroom’s window.

The chorus started and it was like a different person was now standing in the living room. She started dancing, not like you dance on the dance floor, no. She was dancing, doing the exact same moves as in the video for ‘Smooth Criminal’. Brian recognized it because of the song, and also because he had seen the video just recently.

The girl was moving around, snapping her fingers to the beat, her hat still on her head. Brian was mesmerized. She removed her hat and threw it on the ground, letting her hair fall around her shoulder and Brian’s breath got stuck in his throat.

“Athalya…” he whispered, griping the windowsill, making his knuckles turn white. He stood there, watching her, his mouth slightly agape as she kept dancing like Michael Jackson. The song ended just as Athalya dropped down on her knees.

Brian joined his hands together, about to start clapping but caught himself before doing so.
Athalya walked over to the CD player and changed the CD, skipped a couple of songs until the first notes of the all too familiar tune ‘Thriller’ hit Brian’s ears.

She started the choreography right away, not bothering to wait like in the video, but once again, Brian felt like watching MJ rehearsing.

**

She followed every beat, every move reminded her of her mother.

She remembered the countless times she was sitting on the floor, watching as her mother was dancing in the living room.

That’s how she learned how to dance like that, how to get lost in the music, so lost you become unaware of what’s happening around you, unaware of what’s going on in your mind, that’s what Athalya needed at the moment.

So lost, she didn’t even notice Brian watching her from his window.