The Soundtrack To My Semester

Regina.

I sat on my bed, writing in my journal. I really didn’t like the Disney channel. But seeing the agonizing look on Zach’s face was well worth the never ending repeats of The Suite Life Of Zach and Cody. I wonder how long it’ll take for him to realize he can just press the buttons on the TV.

Casually, I glanced down at the page in front of me. My lips curved into a frown. I wasn’t happy with what I’d come up with. My poems always sounded great in my head. On paper? Not so much.

September;
The leaves are turning.
They fade to gray.
My mind is burning.
With what I can’t say.
The dirt is filing.
It’s under my skin.
My teeth are smiling.
………….

For the life of me, I couldn’t think of the last line. Come on, Reggie. Rey, I really liked that nickname. My dad used to call me Rey. I would think someone repeating it again would bother me but.. I liked it coming from Zach. It made me feel comfortable. Even if he was a know-it-all douche bag.

I glanced over at him. He was laying upside down on his bed, glaring daggers at the TV screen. I had to stop myself from laughing. Had it really not crossed his mind to turn it off? He wasn’t noticing me, so I took the opportunity to look at him – I mean really look at him.

I had this.. hobby, sort of. I would look at a stranger, and guess everything about them. From their problems to their past to their height to their shoe size. I think Zach was a 9 or 10. And he had to be at least 5’11. I studied his face closer. Sure, he was cute, adorable even, but there had to be something behind there. Something that made him the way he was. I’m gonna take a wild guess and say one of his parent’s died. He just had that look behind his eyes, that vulnerableness that only someone who’s been in that position can see. And oh boy was I in that position.

Suddenly, I felt bad for the hours of torture. I closed my journal and set it back in my drawer where it belonged. I’d finish the last line of my poem later. I fumbled with the remote, turned it off and then hurled it at Zach. Of course, my aim was horrible and it hit the wall behind him, tearing one of his Led Zeppelin posters.

“My bad..” I said quietly as I laid back in my bed to stare at the ceiling.

Without the noise of the television, the room was dead quiet. Zach hadn’t said anything, which was strange. I would have expected some sort of witty comment. The silence grew louder. It was like a big block of tension in the center of the room; I hated it. I couldn’t live like this.

“Regina?” Thank God. I waited for him to continue. It took him a while. “Is that your natural hair color?”

I laughed, and after a while he started laughing with me. “What do you really wanna ask me?” I’m not stupid, I can see past excuse questions.

“Let’s play 20 questions.” Gee, he was all over the place. “Not the real 20 questions, just the ask each other questions thing. I mean if were gonna be roommates, we should know a few things about each other.. right?”

It sounded more like he was trying to convince himself more than me. But hey, I’ll go along with it. “Okay, but here are the rules.”

“Why does everything always have to have rules?” He whined.

“Because you’ll cheat.” I answered obviously.

There was a slight pause. “True.” He laughed quietly to himself. It was strange how much I enjoyed his laugh. It automatically made me smile. Like when a good comedian can’t help but laugh at his own joke. “What are the rules then?”

“One rule. You have to tell the truth.”

He answered quickly. “Oh, your gonna regret that.”

My eyebrows scrunched, “Why?”

“No reason.” He answered too quickly again. “Oldest goes first, and I’m the oldest.” I sighed, there was no use arguing. There was another pause before he spoke. I wasn’t looking at him but I could tell he had a mischievous grin plastered across his face. “Do you think I’m attractive?”

“Zach!” I groaned, of course he would pick the one question I wouldn’t want to answer. I studied the plastering on the ceiling, finding patterns in it. One section looked like Garfield the Cat.

“Well?” he pressed on, the smile still there.

“You might maybe be a tad bit attractive maybe kinda.” I mumbled under my breath hoping he would just drop the question. Hah, just kidding. Right?

“Sorry, I can’t hear you?” Ugh. I liked this guy much better when he wasn’t talking.

“Your attractive.” I mumbled a little louder this time.

“Say what?” He mimicked a southern accent. I think he might have been paying attention to too many Hannah Montana reruns.

“Your attractive!” I finally screamed.

He chuckled to himself. Not the sweet laugh that I like, an annoying Chuck Bass sort of laugh. That was a Gossip Girl reference to those who don’t know. It means: Evil. Conniving. Egotistical. Jerk. With just a pinch of sexy suave.

“Well thank you. You’re attractive too.” I blushed a bit and was happy we weren’t looking at each other.

I can’t prevent this unwanted attraction, but I know there’s some sensitive side inside of him. I know I’ll try hard as hell to find it. And I know that once I find it, I’ll fall in love with it. That just can’t happen. Ah. I reopened my drawer and reached for my journal again. Opening it to my unfinished poem, I filled in the last line:

‘I won’t let you in.’