Breathe Easy the Doctors Are About to Arrive

I sat cross legged on top of the toilet, peeking out the crack of the door and watching Max. He ran a hand through his hair and he looked just as embarrassed as I was. I still admired him, even in my nervous state. The way he pushed his hair back intrigued me, still. He sat on the foot of the bed and rubbed his face with his hands over and over again. I decided I'd just come out, so I could at least be closer to him. I coughed and cleared my throat as I opened the bathroom door and stepped out in front of him. I paused for a second and stared down at him awkwardly. He raised his head slowly and stared back at me. I could tell he was embarrassed because his cheeks were flushed with pink, making him look almost like a porcelain doll. I giggled at him and ruffled his hair.

"It's not that big of a deal," I said, smiling at him. He just chewed on one of his lip rings and looked back and forth over my face. I walked forward and placed my hands on his shoulders hesitantly. "Really, it's okay," I enunciated.

"I guess," he mumbled, grabbing me around the waist and hugging my topless body. His face only reached my stomach. I smiled and squeezed him back. He softly kissed my belly button and I walked away from him to find my shirt. I found it underneath a tangled pile of blankets and I pulled it over my head instantly. It felt good to have a shirt on again.

"Randi are you done fucking Max?" Jessi retorted through the door.

"Yeah hang on let me just wipe the cum that's dripping off of my fucking face," I yelled back at her.

"THAT'S FUCKING DISGUSTING!" Jessi shrieked. Max and I both burst into laughter as she came through the door anyway. "Never again, dude, never again," Jessi told us. "That gave me images I could have gone forever without imagining," she complained.

"Not my problem," I mumbled, realizing I had the after taste of vomit in the back of my throat and going into the bathroom to rinse out my mouth.

"You should come to the store with me," Jessi said.

"Why?" I asked before I poured Listerine into my mouth.

"Cause you love me, duh," she laughed.

"Hmmmm. What's in it for me?" I joked.

"Condoms and fucking birth control," she said sternly, eyeing down Max like a protective mother lion. I choked on my mouth wash and spit it in the sink as I coughed repeatedly.

"Calm down, Jessica," I told her, gaining control over my lungs again.

"Eh, it's your body," She said, shrugging.

"You act like I'm infected with HIV," Max wined.

"Oh shut up," Jessi said, rolling her eyes at him. Max rolled his eyes back and mocked her, which resulted in a smack in the face.

"God damnit, Jessi! Why do you have to act like so much of a mother to us all the time," I complained. She pointed a tan finger at me.

"You're next," she said, staring at me and walking out the door. "Get dressed and meet me down stairs," she said.

"I'm already dressed," I said, furrowing my brow at her backside.

"Come on, then!" she shouted. I turned around and looked at Max. He was staring at the wall with a blank expression and I walked over to him, planting a tender kiss on his lips.

"I'll be back," I whispered, patting him on the shoulder lovingly. He stared at me as I walked away and didn't say anything, he just watched me. That simple thing that he did with his eyes gave me butterflies, and I loved the feeling. I grabbed my cell phone off of the table next to the bed and sprinted out the door and down the stairs.

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Jessi walked toward me and the cart with her hands full of organic things.

"What the shit?" I commented.

"They're for Bryan," she huffed, stating it like she expected me to know this.

"Oh," I said, rolling my eyes. "Organic cereal, organic cupcakes, organic cookies, organic potato chips, organic salad dressing....Jesus Christ," I said, reading off the titles as they fell out of her arms into the cart.

"My baby likes his muscles, thanks," Jessi said softly as she walked and I pushed the cart to the next isle. I laughed at her, making fun of her calling Bryan "baby", but it didn't phase her. I looked at the isle and I saw animal crackers.

"HOLY SHIT!" I said, gasping and letting a huge smile spread across my face.

"WHAT!" Jessi snapped her head toward my direction.

"ANIMAL CRACKERS!" I squealed, picking up 4 boxes and putting them into the cart.

"No Randi," she laughed, putting 3 boxes back. I pouted, but continued to push the cart behind her as she walked down and through the isles. We got to the medicine and health isles and I then knew exactly what Jessi was doing.

"We don't need anything in this isle," I stated firmly, turning the cart around. Jessi grabbed the cart and halted it.

"Yes we do," she stared into my eyes intently.

"No we don't!" I wined, stamping my feet like a child. Jessi practically dragged me and the cart all the way down the isle until we got to the condoms and pregnancy tests.

"God damnit, Jessi!" I shrieked.

"God damnit, Jessi," she mocked me. "No Randi, who the hell knows who Max's dick has been in, you're getting condoms," she stated as a middle aged, rich looking woman passed us and gave us both dirty looks.

"Jessi! You're pissing me off!" I threatened. She picked up a random box of Trojan condoms and threw them in the cart. I let out a heavy sigh and grinded my jaws together until they made a scratching noise in my ears; I continued to follow her anyways. After I disregarded snickers from the teenage girl working at the cashier register when the condoms had to be scanned, we were all done doing our "shopping". I ignored Jessi the whole way out to the car and didn't bother to help her put groceries in the trunk. I watched her in the rear-view mirror as she put the cart back. I buckled my seat belt and waited for her to yell at me for not helping her. She got in the car, shut the door, and started it. I waited and waited, but she didn't say anything. Half the car ride was silent until she let out a long, exaggerated sigh. All the years I had been friends with Jessi, I knew that meant she had a lot on her mind. "What's wrong?" I asked.

"You're mad at me," she stated simply, resting her head on her hand as she drove.

"Not that much," I said as I squinted my eyes at the afternoon sun.

"Randi, I just care about you okay? You've been through a lot of shit, and I only want what's best for you, because I love you," Jessi said, sighing again. I licked across my teeth and thought for a second.

"I understand that Jessi, and I love you too, but you have to let me take care of myself, dude, or it's not gonna work out, I'm telling you," I said, shaking my head.

"I know, I know....I just can't help myself. Besides...you don't always make the smartest decisions," she said the last part very quietly, but nonetheless I still heard her. It felt like she had punched me in the chest when I heard the last sentence that came out of her mouth. I let my mouth fall open a little bit, and I was sort of thankful that we were already back at Bryan's. I got out of the car and slammed the door as hard as I could.

"God damnit!" I heard Jessi's muffled screams. She knew she had upset me, and I knew she already felt bad. I was pissed and hurt, to say the least. I barged through the front door, making Bryan, who was sitting on the couch, jump and spill his Vitamin Water all over his lap.

"What the fuck!" he yelped as he shot up in frustration. I ignored him, and trudged up the stairs, opening the door and gathering up all of my things. I picked up some stray dirty shirts off of the floor and my other pair of jeans, all of which I had left over here in the past.

"Randi what's wrong?" Max asked, springing up from reading a magazine. He tried to grab me before I rushed out the door.

"Let go Max," I said as calmly as I could.

"What's wrong?" he pleaded softly, turning me around. I looked into his eyes and I saw big green pools of worry, and sadness. I started to cry instantly and I tried to pry my arms out of his grasp but he wouldn't let go.

"Let go!" I cried.

"Tell me what's wrong," he said, agitated that I wouldn't tell him. He squeezed my arms to try to restrain me, sending pain up my wrists.

"You're hurting me!" I screamed. He let go of me and put his hands up in the air. Tears were welling up in his eyes. Deep inside me I knew he didn't mean to at all, but right now was just not a good time for anything. "Don't ever touch me again," I growled, getting images and flashbacks from my past.

"Randi...I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to...please," he said desperately, reaching out and touching my shoulder lightly as I grabbed the door knob.

"I SAID DON'T TOUCH ME!" I roared, the pitch of my voice startling even me. He stepped back and looked at me in shock and anxiety. His hands were trembling, and I almost felt bad for making him this nervous. I rushed out the door, down the stairs, and out the front door carrying all of my things. I ran, I ran as fast I could. I ran away from Bryan's street, hearing Max, Jessi, and Bryan yelling for me. I was pretty sure Jessi even ran after me, losing her breath shortly after though. I just kept running and running. My lungs felt like they were going to explode, but it didn't phase me at all. I passed fast food restaraunts, apartment complexes, gas stations, and road signs. I didn't know where I was going, and at that moment I didn't care.