Adolescence
Damn Girl
When we got back to Billie's house, I unpacked sort of neatly and laid down on the bed.
"What are you thinking about?" Billie asked.
"My life. What's gonna happen now? Am I gonna start smoking again? Will I do drugs? Will I go to school? Will I ever see my parents again? Am I going to live with you my entire life? Is Amber going to be pissed? Will she become my best friend again?...And most importantly, am I happy?"
"Ok...I'm gonna try my best to answer those...What's gonna happen now is you are going to live a better life with me. I won't pressure you into smoking or doing drugs, I hope that you will go to school. I'll try my best to make sure that you never do see your parents ever again. I hope that you do decide to live with me forever. Amber should just be happy for you now that you're in a better place and you should become friends again. And I pray to God that you're always happy."
I kissed him quickly and buried my head in his shirt. "I love you."
He held me closer to his body. "I love you too."
"Would you ever marry me?" I asked.
"Well...I would hope...one day. I thought you didn't want to get married."
I shrugged. "I guess I met this one really great guy and he changed my perspective of everything. Maybe I'll have kids, even."
"Wow! Kids? This guy must've really had an impact on you."
"Definately. Whenever you meet the right person, there's really no way else to have it."
-February 1, 1994-
I only have a couple of months left of school and Billie said he had a surprise for me. I hadn't seen nor heard from either of my parents since that night almost 3 years ago. Amber had her first child towards the end of our junior year with John and is currently still on drugs and the last I heard from her, she's moved in with John. I haven't seen her since the day before she became a mom. Billie and I have a belonged engagement and plan to get married sometime after I graduate. What Billie doesn't know is that I have a surprise of my own. I found out yesterday morning that I was pregnant. I haven't found the correct moment to tell him, but I hope he'll be happy.
"Jessica?" I heard from the front door.
"I'm in the bedroom."
He swung open the door and held up a piece of paper.
"What is that?"
"I bought a house!"
"You-you bought a house? Why? Where?"
"Yes I bought a house. 3700 square feet, two stories, five bedrooms, six bathrooms and a pool!"
"What?! We can't afford that! It's too big for us."
"Yes we can. Dookie came out today and they predict big sales. Babe, we're gonna be rich! And it won't be just us...Tre and Mike are coming along."
"Well...where is it?"
"It's in Berkeley."
"Wow...We're moving really far from Sharon. Why did you buy a house without me?"
"I wanted to surprise you. And it would be better if we were closer to the studio...it's kind of a pain to fly out there all the time, leaving you behind. Besides...aren't you tired of this place?"
"No...not really. I like the character this house has. The cigarette burns on the walls and anonymous stains on the carpet are cute."
"You have an odd definition of cute."
"You know what I mean."
"Yeah, yeah. But won't you move with me? To be forever separated from your parents."
"That does sound tempting. And besides...I think we can really use a spare bedroom."
"What makes you say that?"
"Oh, I don't know," I toyed and messed with his hair. "Friends, family, in case I can't stand you anymore...and children."
"Children? What-" his eyes enlarged. "Jess, are you pregnant?"
"Yeah!" He walked over to me and hugged me. "All I want from you is to be okay with this."
"Okay with this? I am so happy right now!"
"Really? My blocked airspeed hinted nothing."
He smiled and let go. "Sorry." He paused. "Oh my god I'm gonna be a dad! I'm gonna be a dad!"
"And I'm going to be a mom...Well if we're moving, how am I going to go to school?"
"Hmm...Well...We could either move there without anyone knowing right now, or we could wait out the rest of the year."
"Can we wait out the rest of the year? Please? For me?"
"Absolutely." He kissed my forehead. "Wait, if you're pregnant...does that mean we can't have sex anymore?"
I laughed and pushed him away. "That's exactly what it means! Can you stand 8 and a half months of a sexless life?"
He sighed. "Oh I guess. Well how bad is it gonna show until graduation?"
"Well, that's about four and a half months, so I don't think it'll be that bad. Maybe I'll look like I'm overweight."
****
"Billie! Get me a mountain dew..." He came into the living room with the cold soda. "Machine."
"What?"
"I want a mountain dew machine."
"Well, when we move next week, I'll buy you anything. A mountain dew machine or a never ending supply."
I smiled. "Aww you're sweet." I paused and threw up a little in my mouth. "Whoa...Billie! I miss my friends!" I broke out in tears and grabbed his shirt and forced him to sit next to me.
"Um okay...What do you want me to do? Do you want me to call Amber?"
"What would I want to talk to her for? I'm sure she's doing just fine with her little boyfriend, Johnny Boy, and her kid."
"Is that how we're gonna be?" he asked quietly.
"No. You won't be my boyfriend. I want to marry you whenever I can fit into a beautiful wedding gown, so that means whenever this thing," I rubbed my stomach, "comes out."
"Why do you wanna marry me?" he asked with a smile and rubbed my leg.
I smiled and kissed him quickly. "Because you look great in my clothes."
"What are you thinking about?" Billie asked.
"My life. What's gonna happen now? Am I gonna start smoking again? Will I do drugs? Will I go to school? Will I ever see my parents again? Am I going to live with you my entire life? Is Amber going to be pissed? Will she become my best friend again?...And most importantly, am I happy?"
"Ok...I'm gonna try my best to answer those...What's gonna happen now is you are going to live a better life with me. I won't pressure you into smoking or doing drugs, I hope that you will go to school. I'll try my best to make sure that you never do see your parents ever again. I hope that you do decide to live with me forever. Amber should just be happy for you now that you're in a better place and you should become friends again. And I pray to God that you're always happy."
I kissed him quickly and buried my head in his shirt. "I love you."
He held me closer to his body. "I love you too."
"Would you ever marry me?" I asked.
"Well...I would hope...one day. I thought you didn't want to get married."
I shrugged. "I guess I met this one really great guy and he changed my perspective of everything. Maybe I'll have kids, even."
"Wow! Kids? This guy must've really had an impact on you."
"Definately. Whenever you meet the right person, there's really no way else to have it."
-February 1, 1994-
I only have a couple of months left of school and Billie said he had a surprise for me. I hadn't seen nor heard from either of my parents since that night almost 3 years ago. Amber had her first child towards the end of our junior year with John and is currently still on drugs and the last I heard from her, she's moved in with John. I haven't seen her since the day before she became a mom. Billie and I have a belonged engagement and plan to get married sometime after I graduate. What Billie doesn't know is that I have a surprise of my own. I found out yesterday morning that I was pregnant. I haven't found the correct moment to tell him, but I hope he'll be happy.
"Jessica?" I heard from the front door.
"I'm in the bedroom."
He swung open the door and held up a piece of paper.
"What is that?"
"I bought a house!"
"You-you bought a house? Why? Where?"
"Yes I bought a house. 3700 square feet, two stories, five bedrooms, six bathrooms and a pool!"
"What?! We can't afford that! It's too big for us."
"Yes we can. Dookie came out today and they predict big sales. Babe, we're gonna be rich! And it won't be just us...Tre and Mike are coming along."
"Well...where is it?"
"It's in Berkeley."
"Wow...We're moving really far from Sharon. Why did you buy a house without me?"
"I wanted to surprise you. And it would be better if we were closer to the studio...it's kind of a pain to fly out there all the time, leaving you behind. Besides...aren't you tired of this place?"
"No...not really. I like the character this house has. The cigarette burns on the walls and anonymous stains on the carpet are cute."
"You have an odd definition of cute."
"You know what I mean."
"Yeah, yeah. But won't you move with me? To be forever separated from your parents."
"That does sound tempting. And besides...I think we can really use a spare bedroom."
"What makes you say that?"
"Oh, I don't know," I toyed and messed with his hair. "Friends, family, in case I can't stand you anymore...and children."
"Children? What-" his eyes enlarged. "Jess, are you pregnant?"
"Yeah!" He walked over to me and hugged me. "All I want from you is to be okay with this."
"Okay with this? I am so happy right now!"
"Really? My blocked airspeed hinted nothing."
He smiled and let go. "Sorry." He paused. "Oh my god I'm gonna be a dad! I'm gonna be a dad!"
"And I'm going to be a mom...Well if we're moving, how am I going to go to school?"
"Hmm...Well...We could either move there without anyone knowing right now, or we could wait out the rest of the year."
"Can we wait out the rest of the year? Please? For me?"
"Absolutely." He kissed my forehead. "Wait, if you're pregnant...does that mean we can't have sex anymore?"
I laughed and pushed him away. "That's exactly what it means! Can you stand 8 and a half months of a sexless life?"
He sighed. "Oh I guess. Well how bad is it gonna show until graduation?"
"Well, that's about four and a half months, so I don't think it'll be that bad. Maybe I'll look like I'm overweight."
****
"Billie! Get me a mountain dew..." He came into the living room with the cold soda. "Machine."
"What?"
"I want a mountain dew machine."
"Well, when we move next week, I'll buy you anything. A mountain dew machine or a never ending supply."
I smiled. "Aww you're sweet." I paused and threw up a little in my mouth. "Whoa...Billie! I miss my friends!" I broke out in tears and grabbed his shirt and forced him to sit next to me.
"Um okay...What do you want me to do? Do you want me to call Amber?"
"What would I want to talk to her for? I'm sure she's doing just fine with her little boyfriend, Johnny Boy, and her kid."
"Is that how we're gonna be?" he asked quietly.
"No. You won't be my boyfriend. I want to marry you whenever I can fit into a beautiful wedding gown, so that means whenever this thing," I rubbed my stomach, "comes out."
"Why do you wanna marry me?" he asked with a smile and rubbed my leg.
I smiled and kissed him quickly. "Because you look great in my clothes."