P.S. I Hate You

Benji is playing a little video game, waiting for me. I come up the walk, just in time. “Hey, kid,” I greet him and ruffle his hair. “How was your day?” I ask as we head off.

He proceeds to tell me about his teachers and classes as we walk to the bookshop and he finishes just in time. I settle him in a corner to read and work on his math before I hurry off to find Mrs. Walker. I do and proceed on my job.

Finishing up that hours later, I walk home with Benji and we finish up the last of his homework as mom fixes dinner. It actually doesn’t taste too bad for once, and then I have to hurry off and finish my homework which is just frustrating and all, but it’s not like I have much of a choice, you know?

I’m in the bathroom when it happens. Then, when I turn on my light and give the usual look around, I screech and step back, hitting my head hard on doorjam, making me groan and close my eyes, backing out.

“What is it?” Gerald grumbles at the stairs.

“Um…” my eyes widen, glancing back at my room. “Well…”

He frowns and hurries up then steps into my room. Then of course, he gives a curse word or… ten that he’ll never let me repeat. “Who did this?” He finally demands.

My worst enemy. Who else?

“I don’t know,” I lie, and continue rubbing my throbbing head. Wow, that hurt…

“You don’t know who would duct tape three bloody and very dead rats to your window?” He checks. I quickly nod, wishing we’d just get that over with, get it out of mind… ew, make it go away!

Yes, I am a girl, when occasions like that arise. I glance at it again, and shudder. Mother takes one look, gasps, nearly faints, and stumbles down the stairs for something to drink and sleep with. Benji just stares wide-eyed at it.

Gerald huffs and leaves. He comes out from his room in normal work jeans then proceeds to go and get it off everything in the dark. I wait on the stairs, chewing my lip and feeling very, very scarred. Finally, it’s dealt with and Gerald starts up the stairs. I quickly stand. “So it’s all gone?” I ask hopefully.

He glances at me, passing by. “Yeah.”

“Oh…” I hesitate, scratching my head. “Well, thanks,” I mutter and scurry into my room.

I don’t sleep very well after that, of course. Who could? Four hours at the most, I think, is what I get. I just really remember all the tossing and turning that I did- very, very tiring but I just couldn’t get myself to sleep. I considered looking for some sleeping pills, but chose against it.

Benji peaks in around six thirty. “Good morning,” he brightens when he notices my eyes are open.

I manage a tired smile. “Good morning, Benji. Ready for the day?”

He shrugs and shuts the door softly, smiling to himself. Well somebody woke up in a good mood. I sigh, sitting up, scratching my head and wondering how I’ll survive the day. I yawn and stumble out of the covers, and walking off into the bathroom to take a long and very hot shower, in the hopes of it waking me up some more. Unfortunately, it doesn’t really help and thirty minutes later, I’m staring at my closet, wondering if I’m colorblind or something. Not really- just insanely tired, I suppose.

Finally, it’s just some gray jeans and red graphics T-shirt with matching shoes and I pull back most of my hair into a ponytail, brushing it out of my face. I gather my school stuff, and finish reading the last three pages to a book I hadn’t dealt with yet, and head downstairs.

I get to peacefully eat some cereal, not in a rush for the first in forever and listen to Benji chat away about his video game and how he’s been trying to get to another level or something or other… I have no idea, having never played any sort of video game.

“Time to go,” I finally say, standing and taking my bowl over. “Are you ready to go?”

“Yeah,” he agrees, picking up his backpack.

He walks ahead, in an upbeat mood. Caleb’s car passes, but I ignore it as my brother waves to his friend. It makes me recall last night… the guy keeps pulling stunts on me in my home. I embarrass him at school.

Who’s winning? I want revenge, doing something more to him- he can’t just get away with that! How dare he, that meddling fool. That rat, that selfish greedy evil little thing, stealing valuable oxygen! I would do something like that to him… but his mom. I shuffle my feet, looking down. His mom is such a sweetheart, and I can’t really bring myself to do anything that I’ve thought up.

Talk about frustrating.

Well, at least I can humiliate him at school, I suppose. Not that its enough… but it will have to do.

Benji runs off and I head off to my school, bored and practically sleeping as I walk. My day just doesn’t get better, seeing him with her. Gosh, I still can’t believe it. Wow… how could she, though? Is she trying to prove something? Or what? Because I just don’t get it- she’s always been on my side, but she’s suddenly with the enemy. What does she see in him, anyways? I mean, look at him. Sure, he’s tall with good hair, decently smark, a lopsided grin and eyes that could sparkle. But he’s a jerk! That means you just stay away and everything! Doesn’t it?

I shuffle into class after a few waves to my friends, and slump in my chair, closing my eyes in hopes of getting a little sleep before- the bell rings.

Ugh, I hate this. I sigh, peaking my eyes open as everyone trails in. Caleb comes by and I stick my foot out. He totally stumbles and nearly falls, but its still not enough to make me smile. Especially when he turns, rapping my head with his textbook. “Ow!” I snap, jerking up.

“Mr. Williams, please refrain from hitting other students with your books.”

Like that would stop him?