Let My Heart Rest In Pieces

Let My Heart Rest In Pieces 081

My Life

Like it always seemed to happen, my life got busy fast, which it seemed to do whenever I found myself frustrated or angry; mostly with Frankie. Speaking of the stupid boy, I hadn’t seen him in about a week, which made me pretty mad but sad at the same time. He was my best friend, so of course I missed him, but he was also being an absolute idiot. But he was a guy, what do you expect?

Every other night, I would find myself at the Art Center with my teacher, and sometimes Tamara, to go over the soon to come performance. The times that Tamara and I were together, we were never spoiling the concert to one another, always just going over the order or where we were going to enter and exit the stage. When alone, we would work with the orchestra and band when it came to the live music. Everything was going along smoothly, but it was also wearing me out. Sometimes I wanted to shoot myself for doing all of this, but I know the end result would be worth it.

Right now I was in my Free Block, which meant escaping to the library, where I found myself comfy on one of the couches to take a nap. It wasn’t the most comfortable thing in the world, but when you were as exhausted as I was, it didn’t really matter. The moment I had curled up on to the scratching material I fell into a nice cat nap.

I wasn’t very happy when someone woke me up, and if it was one of the librarians, I was going to flip shit. I thought we had become friends, wouldn’t they let me sleep for a little bit? When I managed to open my eyes, I was surprised to see a red head standing over me.

“Tamara? What—?”

“Hey V,” Frankie said, popping up from behind her. I wanted to yell at him—both of them—to go away, but was too happy to see my best friend smiling at me that I smiled back.

“What are you both doing here? I mean, not that the library isn’t public, but still.”

“Frank was telling me what was going on between you two, that you were concerned about our relationship, but we’re fixed now. And now I want you two to be fixed.”

After announcing that, she walked out of the library, leaving her boyfriend alone with me. I looked up at him and he gave me a soft smile. I sat up, seeing as I was still somewhat lying down, patting the spot next to me. The boy sat down, very close to me, and we were quiet for a little while.

“How do you always get out of your class?”

“I’m a guitar God, Envy. Gods can do whatever they want.”

I shook my head at him with a smile, chuckling softly.

“V, I’m sorry.”

It was a very simple apology, something that should have been heard if he had bumped into me while we were walking, not for the big blowout that we had only a week ago. But I felt in his words all the things that he could have possibly said to me in that moment. A simple “I’m sorry” might not have meant much to some, but I noticed it was heartfelt. And to me, that’s all that really mattered. I smiled at him again, though it wasn’t a whole hearted smile of happiness.

“When did we start fighting so much? Last time I checked, BFFs didn’t do that.”

“We’ve never been what you call ‘normal’ Envy.”

“Seriously Frankie, what is wrong with us? It’s almost like every time we come up to one another we’re at each other’s throats.”

Frank sighed, losing his cheery smiled while running a hand through his dark hair. It looked more messed up than usual, seeing as he liked to keep it somewhat nice. It meant that he had done this a few times today. That let me know this really was bothering him as much, or maybe more, as it was bothering me. He leaned his head back on the couch, staring up to the ceiling.

“I’ve never really been good with girls. Not with catching their attention, because I can do that, but with keeping them close. Roxy and Taylor are the only girls that were with us until you, and that’s because I never could deal with anyone else. Plus, a lot of other girls won’t put up with our shit. Then you come along and we’re almost instant friends because you call me out and put me in my place. But even you can’t do that all the time with the stupid things we do. So we fight. But because you’re so important to me, I need to fix it.”

Frankie sat up right then and turned his body to me so that I could stare into his hazel eyes while he could look into my brown ones. The raw emotion I saw in his almost made me turn away, but I kept looking while he talked.

“Now here I am trying to mess up everything with Tamara and I don’t know why; with you being thrown into the middle to top it all off. You were only trying to help while I was driving you away. Don’t tell her this, but I worked hard to fix everything with Tamara because I was so worried about us. All I could think about was what you had said to me, and I knew I needed to get you back.”

He held up his tattooed wrist to me, showing the copy of my bright red lips permanently inked onto his skin. I raised mine as well, showing mine off and he gave me a sad smile.

“This means more to me than you will ever know. I came up with it for Christ’s sake. I’m so sorry that I barely ever show it. Do you forgive me for everything?”

Only seconds after he had finished his rant/apology, I threw my arms around him in a tight hug, pulling him close and resting my head on his shoulder. He didn’t hesitate to hug me back with the same amount of passion. I was so happy, I was almost in tears. Man, am I a loser or what?

“You’re such a pansy,” I laughed, pulling away from him. He gave me the usual Frank smile and shrugged his shoulders.

“You love me for it.”

My heart got a little bit tighter after that, but I didn’t mind and nodded my head. Nothing was going to ruin how happy I was right now.

“I do, but sometimes I wonder why.”

“Maybe because of my devilish good looks, or maybe it’s the sex appeal of being in a band or—.”

I slapped my hand over his mouth—hoping that he didn’t lick it like the child we was—and rolled my eyes.

“Just shut up and give me another hug.”

~~~~~~

“You know V; I kind of hate you right now.”

I gave Jeremy a faux-surprised look while placing a hand over my chest dramatically.

“How could you ever say such a thing to your loving girlfriend?” I questioned with a smirk. That kind of ruined the whole “innocent” thing I had been going for though.

“You put me in such a traumatic position! Even though it’s been a week since our public kiss—which I liked by the way, if I never told you—the guys still make fun of me for it!”

I seriously had to remind myself not to roll my eyes at his antic and just continued walking to his house with him.

“You’re such a baby. Just punch them or something. That’s what I always do when they don’t leave me alone. It works pretty well. I think Jepha still has a—“

“It’s different when it comes to girls,” Jeremy interrupted with a scoff, “sometimes you guys can pack a punch. If not, you’re still a scary woman, so of course they’ll leave you alone. It’s not that easy between bros.”

This time I couldn’t stop the eye roll. Boys; they were way more complicated and confusing than they claimed us girls to be.

“It’ll all stop soon. Bert will do something stupid like he always does then they will rag on him. We’ll be old news in no time.”

“Not to my parents,” Jeremy sighed, looking up into the sky as he walked. It wasn’t the safest thing for him to do, but I guess he trusted me enough not to let him fall into the street to get run over by a car.

“You’re parents are just glad that a girl is interested in you,” I teased with a smirk. Jeremy made a sound but didn’t defend himself, being so used to my teasing that it was just normal behavior now.

“Come on, you have to admit it’s nice that your mom is cooking for us. She’s such a sweet mother, and she’s happy that her boy found a good girl.”

“You’re so modest, you know that?” the boy said, looking over at me now. I just grinned up at him.

“Oh, I know.”

In no time, we were in Jeremy’s house and I could smell our early dinner cooking in Jeremy’s kitchen. I sighed in content and walked in there to see Jeremy’s mother, Karen, slaving over a stove while her husband, Brent, was cutting some things up on the cutting board.

“Hi guys!” I exclaimed, waving at them for full effect. They turned to me and smiled, seeing as their hands were full.

“Our dinner is a surprise, get out of here and go set the table or something. Be useful.”

I gasped at them, seeing where my friend got his wittiness from, and went to the dining room like she had asked. My boyfriend laughed at my expression and gave me a quick kiss to make the pout go away. I smiled at him for that and he helped me make the table.

In case it was confusing to why we were having what you would call dinner so early in the afternoon, Brent had a night time job that took him away from his family for most of the week. Since the relationship Jeremy and I were in really meant that much to his parents, Brent wanted us to all have dinner together as a kind of family. I didn’t mind because Jeremy’s parents were funny as hell and amazing.

Unfortunately for our dinner utensils, the teen boy and I got into a fork fight, both verbally and physically.

“The forks go at the very end of the line, not in the front Jeremy.”

The boy looked over at me with his mixed eyes that were full of confusion. “No, they go on the inside. I do this all the time on holidays.”

“Then you’ve been doing it wrong, because it goes on the outside.”

Our argument continued along like that for a couple minutes before I went at him with my fork like it was a sword fight. He was quick to catch on and we were battling like pirates across the table. We were even making grunting noises and those of pain, really getting into it.

“I really wonder about the sanity of this generation.”

Jeremy and I stopped mid-battle to look over at his mother, who was giving us both a disapproving look. Mumbling apologies, we set the forks down, in the ways that we thought were right, and sat down as she brought the food out.

“Envy, you’re supposed to be a good influence on my son,” Karen said, teasing and giving me a smile.

“It’s impossible to change… that,” I replied, motioning to Jeremy.

“Hey!”

~~~~~~

When I arrived home after the amazing dinner with what seemed like my second family. Brent had driven me home on his way to work, and I was now being lazy on the couch and watching TV, my belly full and in overall a happy mood.

“Envy~!”

Giggling at my father’s sing song voice, I turned around on the couch as he walked through the door, a goofy smile on my face. He threw his coat over the chair like he always did, and threw his keys on the table by the door before coming over to sit next to me. He was almost bouncing next to me in excitement.

“What’s got you all happy? Not that I mind, because I love a hyper Dad.”

He grinned at me without saying a word and gave me an opened envelope, which I took with a weird glance.

“Sorry I opened it, but I thought it was something of mine. Now read it!”

Without reading who the letter was from, I pulled a thick piece of paper out of the crisp white envelope and opened the pre-folded pages. Before even reading a word, I noticed how elegant the typing seemed to be and had to wonder what it was.

“Dear Ms. Envy Moore,” I spoke out loud, “we are glad to inform you that you have been accepted into Pepperdine University with a full ride for all four years.”

My eyes were wide once I finished reading that one sentence and I couldn’t form words. Dad was shaking even harder next to me, practically vibrating. I didn’t surprise him when I screamed in happiness and jumped up to dance around. He even joined in and squealed along beside me.

“T-this isn’t some sick joke is it?”

“No, you got accepted!”

I screamed again and looked down at the letter with a huge smile on my face. I would read the rest of the letter later; right now I was still in a blissful shock from just being accepted. A while ago, I had sent out my applications to schools that had an opportunity for large scholarships, or full rides like this one did. I had really been hoping for this one because it had been so close to my former home. And here it was, like a dream come true.

My life could not get any better at this point in time. I was ready to explode.