Pieces of Me

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GERARD'S P.O.V

What have I done? I was trying to reason with Laura, I didn't think she'd be there. Why was she there? I was just mad, I didn't mean it, I could never say that to Roxy. I think I might have broken her heart. A knot began to wind itself in the pit of my stomach to know that I had made those tears slide down her face.

Frank turned the corner, with a concerned look.

"What happened?" he asked.

"I fucked up, big time," I sighed.

"Did she say anything?" he asked.

"No, not really," I replied, my eyes glued to the hall where I saw her run away from me.

"Nothing, you think you should know?" Frank asked.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"C'mere," He said and sat down on the floor over by the wall. I came over and sat down.

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ROXY'S P.O.V

I had managed to scrape together enough money for a taxi to take me back to the dorm. I decided that I would call the guys when I got to the room where I had gone. My heart was broken, shattered into millions of pieces, I don't think it's possible to put it back together. Horrific thoughts ran through my mind. Did he really mean what he had said? Does he really think I'm just another kid? I was crying when the taxi pulled to a stop and I handed him the money and got out.

I did not expect that shadow lurking by the stairs of the dorm to be looking for me. He stepped out of the bushes so suddenly that I screamed. It was Jack, he was drunk again. He looked me up and down.

"Fuck off!" I yelled not in the mood at all. I knew if he go me on the ground he would do his worst, and I knew I would not have the strength heart or determination now to stop him. I had no reason to try to defend myself anymore. No reason to try to stop him. I had nothing now.

"You told," he slurred.

"How do you know that?" I merely asked.

"I know just about everyone in this fucking town," he slurred. Someone must have over heard, and told Jack. Which means people have had to have known that he did this to me. Did people really hate me that much to watch me suffer and do nothing to stop it? Are people really that heartless? I guess so. I can't believe it took me this long to realize it.

"You know what I'm gonna do to you?" he asked and came closer.

I didn't take a step back, I didn't even budge. "No," I said darkly.

"You're gonna wish you never opened your mouth," he spat.

I looked to the ground where I probably be in about five minutes or less.

"Would be a lot less painful than what I've already been through," I said to him.

"Aww, did someone break little Roxy's heart?" he teased and began to circle me.

I picked up my head a little, and it began to sprinkle at first but then it began to rain harder. I knew Jack would hurt me much more than he did ever before. Would he possibly go to far? Would someone find my body all bloody, mangled and my eyes starring like my dad's were in my dream? Oh how I wished I could hear Gerard call my name now. I would give anything to hear him say my name gently instead with anger.

"I'm gonna break more than that," he hissed and came up close to me. I starred him straight in his cold blue icy eyes. I tried to picture them Gerard's soft beautiful hazel eyes, but Jack's eyes kept breaking my dream of them.

"I dare you to!" I whispered.

He picked me up by the color of my shirt, and looked at my face, into my eyes with what little life I had in them. He punched me in my mouth, and he dropped me. I fell to the floor and I landed with a yelp of pain, but stayed on the floor. I could feel the blood from my bottom lip flow down my chin and down my neck. It was better than having Gerard say I didn't matter.

"Get up!" he yelled and circled me. I didn't get up, I laid on the floor as a tear came down from my eyes. Thoughts of how long I would have to endure this until he got bored or until I slipped into unconsciousness.

He didn't wait for me to get up, he picked me up by my left arm and punched me in the stomach and dropped me again. I fell hard onto the floor, gasping for air, he had knocked the wind out of me. I layed on my back at the raining clouds, as the water mixed with the blood on my lips. More tears came, but not from the pain, no. I was used to pain, I had to go through it when I woke up first in the hospital, when I found out I might not get my memory back, when I saved Gerard and myself and when I realized who my dad was and how I had lost him for ever. I cried from what Gerard had said.

"I said get up!" he yelled. This time I did get up and he kept circling me.

"If your gonna do any worse, hurry up and do it," I challenged.

He smirked and came close to me, next to me his face maybe half an inch from mine

"But I want you to suffer," he whispered evilly into my ear. I felt his hand jab into my side, I moaned from the pain and sunk to my knees and hugged my side. I tried to imagine I was some where else. Any where except here, maybe even my dream forest. I heard the sound of a car pull up and someone getting out. I looked up at Jack, he had seen them to.

"Hey!" I heard a man's voice call out.

Jack picked me up by my collar again, and looked deep into my eyes. I was positive that what ever life or light that had once been in them was gone. It would have been better for them to be black holes instead of eyes. The same for my heart. I was sure it had stopped, sure that it had burst into millions of pieces. Pieces to small to put back together.

Jack lifted up his hand, rain water sliding off of it. I closed my eyes waiting for it to come full speed somewhere on my face. But instead when I heard a punching noise I didn't feel it. He dropped me to the ground and I fell on my face. Nothing unusual about that, I always fall on my face with help from Jack or not.

I took a breath in waiting for him to some back. But instead I heard someone punch again. I opened my eyes and looked up. A man had Jack up against the outside dorm walls and was punching him. I watched the man punch him twice in the face, then three times in the stomach. The man dropped Jack from the wall and he landed with a thud. My hair was now soaked and so were the rest of my clothes. It was raining twice as hard and it was pretty dark except for the one street light that hung from the building's doors.

I saw as he breathed heavily and starred at Jack's still body that only moved as he breathed slowly. The man had knocked him out and his nose was bleeding. The man spit on him and turned around and walked to me. I looked back down at the ground as a wave of excruciating pain swept over me.

"Oh Angel," he whispered. I felt a warm gentle hand on the back of my shoulder.

"Why didn't you tell me?"he asked. I looked up, I tried to smile but it hurt to much. Gerard kneeled next to me.

"Because you said..." I didn't even continue it made me feel so heartbroken.

He sighed and I tried to get up.

"Careful," he said softly and helped me up.

"Oh my god, how long was he doing this until I came?" he asked.

"A while," I admitted.

"You didn't try to fight back!?!" he asked.

"Nothing can be as painful as what you did to me," I said. He looked down, thinking.

"I didn't mean what I said Rox, you know that," he said and looked me back in my eyes.
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GERARD'S P.O.V

There was absolutely no light in her eyes. She was still alive but she was at the point where she could care less if she was dead or alive. Don't tell me I did this to her.

"Then why did you say it?" she asked. It was raining hard, we were both soaked, our hair clinging to our faces and she shivered lightly.

"I don't know," I admitted. And that was the truth.

"It was just to give Laura what she wanted, I guess," I said. She looked away, over her shoulder, even with the heavy rain I could tell she was crying.

"You know she hates me? And I wouldn't mind if she got hit by a bus," she said. I would have laughed at that if we were anywhere else, but she was dead serious.

"That's crazy talk," I said and put my hand on her cold shoulder. She picked it up a little. She was silent for a little while, thinking.

"Is it?" She asked with eyes that said: Don't tell me your that blind.
Okay I admit it, they hated each other. And yes Laura is a little more, pink, and doesn't like all my drawings and habits as much as Roxy does, she can get upset easily which can get on my nerves some times.

"Gerard, I don't understand you anymore," she said in a desperate tone.

"You put away your drawings, you always put her before friends, I know you wanted to come to dinner with everyone, she's the kind of girl that would pick on you in high school. She, she, she doesn't love you for who you are!" She said and walked a few feet from me.

"And how would you know this?" I asked defensively.

"How wouldn't I?" She asked turning around.

"Gerard, please, all I'm saying is, you've broken my heart to many times, I don't want to see her break yours, because then mine will break all over again," She said and began to walk inside to her dorm.

I didn't want her to leave, but I knew she always stayed when I yelled, she was so hurt so me yelling a little couldn't do to much.

"Break your heart?'' I asked sarcastically.

"I've risked everything for you! I'm not even to sure Laura will take me back after tonight!" I yelled. She looked down at the floor then back up at me.

"I've risked everything for you, even my life. You know Jack wouldn't hesitate to kill me, hell he was gonna try tonight!" She yelled back.

"I kept quiet to try to save you and Laura. Gerard, I'm sorry I cost you your girlfriend who didn't love you like I know someone else could, I'm so damn sorry I cost you your perfect life!" she said. Something in me lit up, someone finally turned on the light bulb.

When Roxy was gone I had missed her, but I blamed my feelings on being single. Laura was beautiful, single, and I needed someone. But the thing is Roxy never left my mind, not since we first found her hiding in Bob's bunk. When I proposed to her, it was because I was scared of feelings that were building for her. I was scared of losing what I thought I wanted. And here poor Roxy was being beaten up, and dying on the inside.

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ROXY'S P.O.V

I said it with the most apologetic way I could do it in. I meant everything I said, and I could see him, thinking in the rain.

"What are you saying?" he said picking up his head. My heart was already beyond being saved, there's no way any more damage from his words could hurt me even more.

"I'm saying, I'm sorry I love you," I finally said. It felt like I had broken down a wall that had been building, and building for so long, and now it was gone. I had told him how I felt, and now I look at him with tear filled eyes begging inside that he will at least let me down gently.

"I'm sorry I'm in love with you. I'm sorry I love you because of the beautiful dork that you are, and that I could care less if you like to draw creepy drawings, that you care for other people besides me," I said and went to go inside.

I pulled open the door, sobbing but the rain water hid that fact.

"Roxy," I heard him call. I heard him jog up behind me. I took a deep breath.

"I need to know something," he sighed.

"What?" I asked.

I just then noticed we were close, close enough I felt his breath on my cheek. He wound his arm around my waist, like I dreamed so many times how he would do. How I wished every night how he would hold me.

"I need to know why I feel the way I do," he whispered.

He put the other hand behind my head, gently losing it in my soaking hair. The rain now gently sprinkled our faces. I put one hand on his shoulder, he was wet but warm. I put the other behind his head, letting my own hand get lost in his dark wet hair.

I think in that moment he took the pieces of my heart and magically put them together with out any effort what so ever. He brought my head closer and brought my body up so his, and he kissed me. It was how I dreamed it. First he just kissed my lips then began to put more passion, letting his tongue explore my own mouth.

When he pulled back my eyes were wide and my heart was beating as fast as it could.