Fake Boyfriend

Being single can be such a bitch sometimes. Danica had started dating a new guy, Braxton. He was sweet and simple in his romantic gestures. He showed up with flowers and held the car door open for her. Craig was doing the same for Morgan even after a year of dating. And there was me, all alone. Well, I wasn’t all alone. Jesse was there, right in my sights. Of course when I say my sights, I meant the trajectory of my macaroni and cheese. Danica caught me and made me put the spoon down. Morgan did the same to Jesse and our food fight was halted. We had chosen a local hot spot for our dinner together, the six of us. I had been made to sit across from Jesse and as usual we started our tirade on each other. It was about halfway through the dinner when all the couples were quietly talking to each other when I noticed Jesse staring at someone in the bar.

“What?” I said, shoving food into my mouth. His eyes trailed a path, as if he was following someone.

“Just hush,” he said.

“You following a hot chick?” I said. He glared at me.

“Don’t freak out,” he said. Thoughts rippled through me, wondering what he meant. Then it hit me, more like his lips did. The unexpected kiss tasted like lemon pepper, the seasoning on his chicken. I kept my eyes closed, wary of what my friends were thinking. After a few seconds he abruptly pulled away and started eating his chicken again.

“Would someone please explain to me what just happened?” Morgan asked.

“I’m at a loss for words,” Danica said.

“I thought you guys weren’t dating,” Craig said next.

“Best. Dinner. Ever.” I rolled my eyes at Braxton’s comment. I knew there was a snar ky little bastard just waiting to come out.

“We aren’t dating and I’m just as confused as anyone else,” I said. Jesse rolled his eyes.

“You didn’t see him?” he asked.

“Apparently not. Who, the Easter Bunny? Santa Claus? All I saw was your lips coming towards mine. Care to explain?” I said to him in a hushed but angry tone.

“Taylor was here and I think he saw you. He was coming right towards you but I don’t think he saw me. I chose some evasive action. Thought you’d appreciate the gesture. Once again, you owe me,” he said. I sat there speechless. Danica and Morgan decided that was the best opportunity to have a girl bathroom break. They drug me to the back of the restaurant and almost threw me into the door trying to get me in there.

“Whoa ladies. I think I can manage going to the bathroom myself,” I said as I adjusted my now messy clothing.

“I think you enjoyed that kiss,” Morgan said as she aimlessly fixed her hair. Her blonde hair had been worn down and looked gorgeous. My short dark bob didn’t measure up to her luscious locks.

“I think you’ve been drinking too much wine tonight,” I said. I joined her at the mirror and reapplied my lip gloss.

“Making sure your lips are in perfect condition in case Jesse wants to steal another kiss?” Danica said. Her curly auburn hair bounced as she walked to the mirror.

“He smeared most of it off when he did kiss me. There are available men in this place and I want to look presentable,” I said.

“Well after they saw that kiss, your hopes of even landing some digits went out the window. You could try on some guy but then you’d seem easy. We don’t want that to happen now do we?” Morgan said.

“I hate you guys,” I said and left the bathroom. I heard their laughter as the followed me and flipped them off.

“Wow. Classy,” Jesse said.

“Shut it you. You just possibly ruined my chance of snagging that cute guy at the bar number. So I think we are even,” I said.

“Why don’t you go get yourself a drink and see if he goes for it. I don’t think he saw the kiss. I think the football game had most of his attention. Lucky guy,” Craig said. Morgan promptly kicked him under the table.

“Well, I guess the alcohol could wash the taste of Jesse out of my mouth. I’ll be back,” I said. I went up to the bar and put on my best act. I smiled, laughed at his jokes, and flirted like it was my full time job. As dessert arrived and he left for the evening, I had managed to get his number and a date for tomorrow night. His name was Joseph and he worked for one of the local tv stations as a producer. That’s all I needed to hear to get me hooked, nice steady job with a steady paycheck.

“Well?” Morgan asked as I sat back down at the table ready to engorge myself on a piece of chocolate cake.

“I knew there was a reason I liked Craig. The jury’s still out on Braxton though,” I said.

The next night went amazingly well. We had a great dinner and talked over drinks. Conversation was very much lax on his end but I made up for it. I knew sooner then later I’d get him talking. We were with each other almost every night the following month, except for the next movie night. I had stopped at Blockbuster to grab a movie since it was my night to chose. When I found the one I wanted (which happened to be the only one remaining) I reached for it to find it snatched out from underneath me.

“Oh sorry. Oh, it’s you,” Jesse said. I gritted my teeth.

“Yes it’s me. Could you please hand me that movie, it’s for tonight,” I said, holding out my hand for the dvd.

“Maybe I want to watch this in the privacy of my own home and have you pick something else.”

“Jesse would you quit being so difficult and give me the movie?” He held out the dvd halfway before pulling it back.

“Is Joseph coming over?” he asked. I grabbed the dvd from him.

“No. He, unlike my present company, understands the term ‘girls night’ and will be joining us tomorrow night for the party,” I said.

“Good, just wanted to make sure it was just us girls,” he said and walked away. I don’t know why I let him pester me so much. I paid for my dvd and left, only to find Jesse waiting by my car.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“Waiting for you.”

“And here I am. Now what do you want?”

“I just wanted to know if you wanted to stop by the store with me to get some snacks. That way you don’t lose half your food supply when Morgan goes through your cabinets,” he said.

“You walked here didn’t you?”

“Yes.”

“I knew there was an ulterior motive with you. Fine we’ll go the store. Just keep your hands and arms inside the vehicle if you value your safety,” I said after I unlocked the door.