Letters From Jack

Making Things Better

The Joker groaned as he heard the bedroom door upstairs slam. He had expected her to take it badly, but he didn't expect her to just walk away. He licked over his lips and stood up off the couch. Why couldn't this conversation take place at a different time? Why couldn't he have just shut his mouth and swallowed the guilt? She was fourteen weeks pregnant. She defiantly didn't need this right now. He needed to walk upstairs and fix things.

He locked up downstairs and then turned the television off. He shook his head as he started walking up the stairs. With each step he took, he tried to think about what he could possibly say to her to make things better. He knew an apology would be in order. He would need to say the word he hated so much.

He stood outside the bedroom door for several minutes. He listened for crying but didn't hear anything. He sighed, as he turned the knob and walked inside the room. She had the covers up over her, and her body was turned against him. He walked over and stood in front of her. She looked up at him, but she really didn't say anything.

"We going to talk?" He asked.

"Why should we?" She hissed, in a dry voice.

"We need to talk, Zoe."

"I don't need to talk to you about anything right now. I'm staying calm to keep our baby safe. So if you would please just leave me alone then I would appreciate it."

He sighed, and then stripped his t-shirt over his head and unbuttoned his jeans. He walked over and shut off the lights before crawling in bed beside her. He scooted close to her and wrapped his arm around her. He was surprised when she didn't push him away.

"I'm. .s-sorry, Zoe. If you'd just give me time to explain." He whispered.

She had fought back the tears to appear stronger than she was. It killed her to think that he had been with another woman besides her. Especially recently. She rolled over and looked at him. His pale features stood out with the glowing moon light coming in through the window.

"Why?" She asked, her voice still dry.

"I was trying to forget about you. It was driving me crazy that every thought I had contained you. It only happened once, well, I don't even consider it a time considering I didn't get anything from it other than guilt."

"It's actually quite funny," he started to explain, "I saw her get the condom and my mind went completely to you. I remembered how we didn't have anything, and I found myself questioning if you were on birth control or not. The entire time she was on top. . . I just couldn't think about anything but you. I was completely numb and couldn't believe I had dropped to this level to forget you. When she finished, I basically just pushed her off me."

"And then you killed her?"

"Later, yes."

"What if she had been pregnant?"

"She wasn't pregnant."

"Jack! She could have been pregnant!"

"Listen, she wasn't pregnant! I didn't even fucking get off! I didn't do anything! I fucking went limp half way through, okay? I only want you. I don't know why I done it, Zoe. I was trying to get you off my mind and it didn't help."

She nodded her head, and scooted closer to him. She didn't want to stay mad at him. He had made a mistake, and she wouldn't hold it against him forever. She didn't know when she could fully forgive him for it, but she really didn't want to stay mad at him right now.. They had a strained relationship already. She didn't want to make it worse.

He kissed her on the forehead, "I love you."

"I love you too, Jack."

"I'm really sorry."

"I know you are."

He sighed, as then scooted even closer to her. They couldn't get any closer. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close to him. She leaned up and kissed him softly on where ever she could.

"Baby, I'll give it up soon. Okay?"

"Only if you want Jack." She told him, hoping he would do it for himself rather than for her.

"I promise soon. I just need to get some more things done. I've got a great start. I'm doing this for you and the baby now though, okay? It's not about being the Joker anymore. I'm done with that. The reason I was him to begin with doesn't exist anymore. You're with me again, and I don't need anything but you. but I do need to do a few more things before I fully give it up. Just promise me you trust me and won't leave."

She sighed, "I trust you, Jack."

He nodded, and then leaned down and kissed her softly on the forehead, "Get some rest. I'm taking you out tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" She asked.

"Yes, you and I are going to go have a nice day out."

She smiled, and then cuddled up close to him and closed her eyes. She smiled knowing he wasn't lying. Soon he would give up being The Joker and they would live happily for the rest of their lives.
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