Hurricane

July 2005

When I woke up a little while later, Pete was still holding onto me but he wasn’t asleep. He smiled at me and I smiled back.

“Did you sleep at all?” I asked him.

“A little,” he said.

“What time is it?” I asked.

“Around 12,” he said. “Are you hungry?”

“Yeah,” I said.

“Well let’s get up and we’ll go eat,” he said. He let go of me and slid out of the bed. I got up as well, and shivered. I had been so warm from the blanket and Pete. Pete chuckled. “Cold?”

“Yeah,” I said. I followed Pete out of his room and we went downstairs and to the kitchen. When we got in the kitchen, I started to dig through the cabinets looking for something to eat like I always did. The first time I was here Pete had told me that he couldn’t cook and that I was welcome to help myself to whatever I wanted in the kitchen.

After making a sandwich, I sat with Pete at the kitchen table. Pete was eating some chips. We were silent as we ate and when I was done, I had decided that I needed to just talk to Pete about how I was feeling. I was realizing that he always did or said something that would make me feel better—I just hoped that it would work this time.

“Can we talk, Pete?” I asked, sitting down at the table again.

“Yeah,” Pete said. “I told you that you can always talk to me.”

“I know,” I said. We were quiet.

“So what is it?” Pete asked. I hesitated for a moment.

“It’s just—I’m worried,” I said. I took a breath and looked at my hands. “I’m worried about how I’m going to be when you’re gone just because I couldn’t even make it through a whole day without you.”

“Molly,” he said. “That was just because your mom kept checking on you. I talked to her about it and she understands now.”

“But, if I’m not going to be coming here, where am I going to go?” I asked. “What if it’s like how it was before I started coming here? Is my mom really going to trust me to be alone all day when she’s off work?”

“I talked to your mom about this as well just this morning,” he said. “I told her that I think you’ll be fine on your own. I trust you. Your mom trusts you. She’s not going to stay home to keep an eye on you.”

I nodded my head.

“I’m also going to get you something before I leave that I think you’ll like,” he said.

“You don’t have to get me anything,” I said, looking at him.

“Trust me when I say you’ll be glad to get it,” he said. I rolled my eyes.

“If you say so,” I said.

“You’ll see when you get it,” Pete said.

Pete stood up and I followed. We went back to Pete’s room and I sat on his bed. He sat next to me.

“You know,” Pete said. “I think you should meet my band. I think you’d like them.”

“I’d like to meet them,” I said.

“Really?” Pete asked me. I nodded my head. “Cool. I’ll set that up for one day.”

We were silent and I rested my head on Pete’s shoulder.

“So,” Pete said after a moment. “What do you want to do for the rest of the day?”

“I don’t know,” I said.

“That’s helpful,” Pete said. I looked up at him and smiled.

“I try,” I said. Pete smiled before leaning down to kiss me. I turned slightly so that I was more comfortable and placed my hands on the back of Pete’s neck, pulling his face closer to me. So far, the kisses we had shared were soft—but this one was a bit harder. And I liked it. It had been a while since I had kissed like this. I parted my lips slightly and moved my tongue to touch Pete’s lips. Instead of giving my tongue entrance to his mouth he pulled away.

“I hope you don’t mind if we take this slow,” Pete said. I nodded my head. “It’s just, the last time I was in a relationship things went too fast and things just kind of took a turn for the worst.”

I smiled at him.

“It’s fine,” I said. He smiled back at me before kissing me softly. He pulled away.

“If there’s nothing you want to do, I’m going to write,” Pete said.

“That’s fine,” I said. I smiled as Pete sat down at his desk and started to write. This time I didn’t mind that he was writing. I just kept telling myself what Pete had told me: That everything would be fine.