Altansetseg
Let's get drunk and go out DRIVING!
*Altansetseg’s POV*
“Altansetseg! Altansetseg!”
I hear my name being called. Yes, my name is Altansetseg. Altansetseg Anne Wright, to be precise. You see, my mom was on drugs when she named me. A lot of them. My mom was a whore, too. That’s why I’m even alive. She died of AIDS on July 14, 1991, on my 5th birthday. So here I am, in an orphanage. It sucks here by the way. They make us scrub floors and shit.
“Altansetseg!”
Oh, shit. I forgot. I turn off my old personal CD player (donated to the orphanage), and a CD called Kerplunk by a band called Green Day. It was donated, too, but they didn’t want it so I stole it. Nobody’s loss. I go and see what Mrs. Walrus wants.
“Altansetseg, you’re late for mealtime!” I gaze at the…stuff. Screw lunch. I go and sit by Amy. Right then, Mrs. Walrus makes an announcement. “I would like to introduce a new staff member-Mr. Frank Edwin Wright III.” He is wearing plaid shorts and…a t-shirt with a sombrero on it. He has hair the same color as mine-reddish brown. He had it styled in a messy faux-hawk, and has bright blue eyes, once again, like mine. Hmm. I guess we have a lot in common.
“Please,” he interrupts Mrs. Walrus, “Call me Cool. Tre Cool!” I like him already.
*Tre’s POV*
I was sitting at home one day with my son and ex-wife, and I decided to get drunk and go out driving. “I’m going to go get a DUI,” I announced. So I drove off to the nearest bar, and got as wasted as possible. Then, I decided to drive aimlessly, while blasting the song ‘DUI’ on my car radio. I manage to swerve and miss a deer, hitting an old lady instead. Hmm…what a pleasant evening. I hear sirens. Slowly, I pull over, hitting 3 midget children.
“’Ello, officer. How are you this fine ev’ning?” I say in an Aussie accent.
“Sir, have you been drinking?”
“Yes,” I respond, over DUI, still in an Aussie accent.
‘I must ask you to step out of the vehicle, sir.”
I get out of the car, tripping over an Asian kid who is stuck in my tire. Apparently I am under arrest.
“Altansetseg! Altansetseg!”
I hear my name being called. Yes, my name is Altansetseg. Altansetseg Anne Wright, to be precise. You see, my mom was on drugs when she named me. A lot of them. My mom was a whore, too. That’s why I’m even alive. She died of AIDS on July 14, 1991, on my 5th birthday. So here I am, in an orphanage. It sucks here by the way. They make us scrub floors and shit.
“Altansetseg!”
Oh, shit. I forgot. I turn off my old personal CD player (donated to the orphanage), and a CD called Kerplunk by a band called Green Day. It was donated, too, but they didn’t want it so I stole it. Nobody’s loss. I go and see what Mrs. Walrus wants.
“Altansetseg, you’re late for mealtime!” I gaze at the…stuff. Screw lunch. I go and sit by Amy. Right then, Mrs. Walrus makes an announcement. “I would like to introduce a new staff member-Mr. Frank Edwin Wright III.” He is wearing plaid shorts and…a t-shirt with a sombrero on it. He has hair the same color as mine-reddish brown. He had it styled in a messy faux-hawk, and has bright blue eyes, once again, like mine. Hmm. I guess we have a lot in common.
“Please,” he interrupts Mrs. Walrus, “Call me Cool. Tre Cool!” I like him already.
*Tre’s POV*
I was sitting at home one day with my son and ex-wife, and I decided to get drunk and go out driving. “I’m going to go get a DUI,” I announced. So I drove off to the nearest bar, and got as wasted as possible. Then, I decided to drive aimlessly, while blasting the song ‘DUI’ on my car radio. I manage to swerve and miss a deer, hitting an old lady instead. Hmm…what a pleasant evening. I hear sirens. Slowly, I pull over, hitting 3 midget children.
“’Ello, officer. How are you this fine ev’ning?” I say in an Aussie accent.
“Sir, have you been drinking?”
“Yes,” I respond, over DUI, still in an Aussie accent.
‘I must ask you to step out of the vehicle, sir.”
I get out of the car, tripping over an Asian kid who is stuck in my tire. Apparently I am under arrest.