Behind Closed Doors

Fight- [fahyt] noun, verb.
1. a battle or combat.
2. any contest or struggle.
3. an angry argument or disagreement.
4. a bout or contest.
5. a game or diversion.
6. ability, will, or inclination to fight.

Also see;daily event at the Jonas'.

I used to think that my parent's fights were bad, but that was until I was invited inside the life of the Jonas family. When they fought, they fought. Combine the stress of the spotlight, the pressure of Hollywood, along with the confinement of Disney, you have a ticking time bomb of anger and frustration. I cannot recall how many times I've witnessed those siblings fight, and how shocking it was to see every time. You think I'd get used to it, but it seemed like that every time one occurred, they just got worse and worse.

I can clearly remember the first day I saw a glimpse into their life outside of the public eye. It was the first time Joe decided to bring me home for dinner, which would seem a little nerve racking to any girlfriend. But, picture how nervous I was, just a normal girl, who caught the wandering eye of a super star. Not like that mattered to me, I liked Joseph for who he was as a person, not that he was wanted by millions of girls on the planet. And almost every single one of them, hated me. Even though they didn't know me, they'd find some reason to hate me. They'd bring my past back to haunt me, and sometimes even affected my insecurity. But, I kept telling myself, this is worth it. All of this is worth it, because I'm with the love of my life. I'll tell you one thing in advance; it wasn't worth it.

Joe bringing me to dinner, was possibly, a turning point in the next three years of my life. After the awkward questions and silence, dinner went moderately smoothly. But, when Mr. and Mrs. Jonas left the table, things took a turn for the worse.

"Kev, how long until Mom calls Emilie a whore?" Nick asked nonchalantly, glancing over at his brother, a sly smile playing on his lips. I remember looking up, my heart sinking to my stomach, and I glanced nervously at Joe. His eyes were staring down at his hands, his nostrils flaring with every deep breath he took, he looked completely different from the guy I fell for. "I give it a week," Kevin replied swiftly, an equally smug smile on his face.

"Shut your mouth, Nick." Joe mumbled lowly, his eyes now on me, and I stared awkwardly down at my drink, as my heart sped up immensely. "She always does that Joe, and you're the ass who listens to her." His voice was calm , as if this subject has been talked about often. "You're one to talk." Joe's voice was sharp, and I clearly remember jumping at his sudden temper.

"Emilie has it written all over her," Nick continued to talk seamlessly, "Mom thinks she has you wrapped around her finger," Joe's hands tightened into fists, as his eyes shot his brother a look that could kill, "And frankly, it looks just like that."

I cleared my throat quietly, starring over at Kevin, who was examining me head to toe. "But it's not, Nicholas. I'm sorry you're jealous, but don't try to ruin something yet again for me." Joe's voice was stern, and I just averted my eyes down, not really sure of what to do. I remember hoping this was a dream, that this wasn't really happening.

"Jealous?" Nick chuckled in a cocky way, which was not what I expected from him, this wasn't what I expecting from any of them. "I could surely do better than her." His words stung, as I sucked in breath as built up the courage to actually look at him.

"Shut up, jackass." Was the only thing I could think of saying, my eyes were stinging with tears. "Em, don't listen to him. He's a jealous, stuck up, ass hole." Joe tried to comfort me, and I could see it in his eyes, he was more than embarrassed. He was ashamed, embarrassed, and apologetic for his own brothers actions. This wasn't like Joe, and he knew it.

"You're the asshole, Joe. You're always so oblivious to what girls do to you. Just because she has killer legs and a nice face, you swoon over every word she says. You're stupid." Nick spoke all too quickly, and I remember considering standing up and leaving at that point. Yeah, he's a jonas brother, but that gives him no right to ever speak of me that way, or anyone. But, I'm the gullible one who sat there and watched, just because I'm wasn't strong enough to leave it all behind. I thought I needed Joe, and back then I did. Oh, how wrong I was.

As that night went on, I sat there and took the blows, and fell for a Joe a little harder every time he stuck up for me. "Joe, your skank is in my seat." Nick stood over me, and I did nothing but roll my eyes. Looking back on it now, I would say so much more than I did, I would change half of that night, but there's no use in that. "She's not a skank, go sit somewhere else." Joe didn't even look at him, and I could tell he was holding back a lot of anger, because the vein in his neck was much more visible, and the grip he had on my hand was getting tighter.

"Get up." He was staring down at me, a blank expression on his face, which I should have took as a warning, but of course my stupid self didn't listen. "No." I replied with attitude in my voice, trying to show that he didn't intimidate me. He was merely my boyfriends brother, and I wouldn't let him get to me. "Get the fuck up." He said with a glare, and I felt my stomach twirl. This wasn't the Nick Jonas everyone knew, if only they could see him now. "It's just a seat, stop being immature." Kevin even said, knowing that he was taking this out of hand.

I think Kevin knew what Nick was going to do next, because I saw it in his eyes. I saw the worry they held, and even though he wasn't who I thought he was, I knew he felt for me within that short moment. "No, Kevin I won't stop being immature!" Nick raised his voice, and I flinched back, gripping Joe's hand tighter than he was before.

"Nick, shut up and sit down!" Joe snapped next to me, dropping my hand and getting to his feet. I sighed as I was expecting this all night, the first night I meet my boyfriends parents and siblings inside their home, all hell breaks loose. "Don't tell me what to do!" Nick screamed in his face, and I took a wavering breath. Kevin was still sitting down, his hungry eyes surveying my entire body again, obviously ignoring his brothers bickering.

"Please stop." I whispered hopelessly, falling back into the couch my eyes fixed on Joe, almost on the verge of crying. They both exchanged mumbled words, their faces close and their bodies almost in contact. "Joe, please just stop." I repeated, this time a little louder. Kevin knew exactly where this was going to go, but there goes my mind pushing me to do foolish things again.

Without thinking I was on my feet, and in front of Joe, my hands on his chest, trying to separate him from his younger brother, who was snickering behind me. "Joe, calm down baby. Please, just... stop." I begged as he looked down at me, the vein in his forehead visible, and his stare almost scared me. I stayed silent, my breathing audible as he blinked slowly a couple of times.

I thought I was getting to him, I thought everything was going to be fine that this was just all going to be a faint memory of ours. Something that would be forgotten about in a couple of months. But Nick decided differently, his hand snaked around my waist and he pulled me close to his body, as he nuzzled his head in my neck. My hands were pulled off of Joe's rising and falling chest, and I elbowed him desperately trying to get him off of me.

"Nick stop!"I shouted, not even daring to look at Joe, as Nicks hand teased around my hip, which made me physically ill. I could've thrown up right then and there. "Get the fuck off of her." Joe spat, and I glimpsed up at him, his eyes were fierce as he rolled up his sleeve a little past his elbow, and then I broke at the mere sight of him. A tear escaped my eye and I kicked at Nick, who let go of waist and pushed me over to the side and onto the hardwood floors.

Nick got in the first punch, hitting Joe square in the mouth, even causing me to cringe at the sight. Joe wasn't slowed down by the hit, as he immediately shoved Nick into the wall behind him, pinning his face against the wall. "Joe, stop!" I screamed desperately, I didn't know what to do. Where was his parents? Why didn't they care that their sons were physically hurting each other?

"Kevin, do something." I looked over at him, as he was just leaning back against the recliner, without a care in the world. Kevin didn't care about his brothers fighting, because it didn't involve him. It didn't involve his girlfriend, so why should he give a crap? These boys weren't who I thought they were, the public Kevin would be up on his feet breaking up this fight, but not the real Kevin.

It took me quite a while to break them up, as whenever Joe would calm down, Nick would do something repulsive to me which angered Joe again. I was desperate, and actually got Kevin to lock up Nick in his room. At the end of this ordinary occurrence at the Jonas household, Joe had a swollen lip, which was cut by his adorable overbite. I nursed all of his bruises or cuts, and tried to hide my tears from him.

"Why are you crying?" He had managed to ask me, pushing my hair away from face, the Joe I had fallen for back in my grasp. I came up with a lie, something about me fearing for him, but I never told him the true reason why I had shed numerous tears that night. I was upset over him, and his brothers. They weren't who I thought they were, along with everyone in the entire world. It all was an image, that millions of girls swooned over, and one I had hoped for. It was all an image, that would never be mine. The Jonas' were far more than a normal family from New Jersey who made it big. They were a normal family from New Jersey who made it big, with bigger problems than their fame.