Every Inch of Sanity

I raised my eyebrow questioningly , confused by his expression of bewilderment.

"Yes! Who else?", I answered, hesitating.
The weird conversation attracted the attention of Bob and Ray,who were still fumbling with their instruments in the garage.They slowly left everything and walked over to where Gerard and Frank where standing.
Mikey, still adjusting the cord of his bass guitar - almost absent-mindedly - had not moved at inch.He merely looked up, then looked right back at his guitar.But, as I continued watching him, his head rose slowly, and a weird glint ignited his eyes.He slowly put aside his guitar, and quietly took small steps toward us.
Everyone silently watched him as he passed them and continued toward me.As he got closer, I felt my heart hammer against my chest, racing.
He halted right in front of me, about half a meter separating us.With my peripheral vision, I could see Eliza and Jamia retreat slowly.
Mikey's lips slowly parted, and my breath hitched .His frail arm slowly rose from by his side, and came at my cheek.
I closed my eyes, waiting for the blow that accompanied such movement, not pausing for a minute to think why he would slap me.My wait was rewarded with a very different kind of touch, a gentle , soothing hand on my cheek.Certainly not meaning to slap me.

"You look beautiful."
My eyes flashed open, starting at the source of the voice that I have never heard before.
I stared in silence at Mikey's hazel eyes, glinting behind his glasses.He stared back, not removing his hand from my cheek.
Suddenly aware of his hand, I felt blood rush up to my cheeks, tainting them a deep pink color.
My lips parted as I tried to say something, but I couldn't utter a work.The silence rang in my ear, deafening me.Everyone watched us.
Finally, I swallowed and managed to get my tongue moving.

"Thanks...", I whispered quietly.And that's what triggered it.

As soon as I uttered that word, Mikey's expression changed, and I felt his hand tremble.
Eyes widening, he withdrew his hand and stared at it in horror, then at me.In a flash, he started running past me, hurriedly mumbling a broken 'sorry'.
We all stood in our places,transfixed.My hand flew instinctively to cover my cheek.

"Wow...", someone breathed, but I couldn't figure out who it was.I spun around and watched Mikey run.

"Um, okay...Let's go inside you guys.".This time I know it was Eliza who was talking.I saw her run up to Gerard and whisper something urgently.Gerard quietly agreed , and started walking towards the direction Mikey went.

Unthinkingly, my arm flew up to stop Gerard.

"No, let me...", I whispered, my mind working slowly.

Gerard looked at me , uncertainty in his eyes.

"Don't worry about it.", I slowly patted him on the arm, and started walking, searching.

I didn't have to search long, after about 5 minutes of walking, I noticed a lonesome figure sitting on a bench in a deserted park.I slowly sped up my pace, approaching the creaky bench.
I nervously tugged at the sleeve of my black hoodie, feeling a weird chill creeping on me.

"Mikey...?", I called out, unsure.

The frail figured slowly looked up at my call, and what I saw in his eyes made me halt.
Agony.Pure, raw agony, burning it's way through every cell of his being.
Although he didn't say much, his eyes said all. I could feel how much he was hurting, how hard it was.
I slowly approached him, careful not to trigger any sudden reaction.

"Can I sit here?", I quietly asked, pointing to the empty space beside him, feeling really awkward.

His nod was so subtle I barely acknowledged it.I slowly sat down.

"Gerard wants you so they could start practice.", I smoothly lied, thinking of no better reason for me to be here.

He merely glanced up at me.
The silence beat down hard on my eardrum,making me feel even more awkward.

"I'm sorry",he suddenly said, so quietly that I doubted he even said anything.

"I'm really sorry.",he repeated, and suddenly it was like all the barriers had been broken.Mikey looked up at me, tears overflowing, his eyes deeply apologetic.

I opened my mouth to say something, to contradict him.
But he talked first.

"I'm awfully sorry, ", he sobbed."It's ...it's just that..I really miss her.And....you remind me so much of her...".

I watched, unable to say anything.

"She was the best thing that happened to me in a long time.I loved her....", he suddenly trailed off, staring at the ground again.
A sudden impulse struck me, and for the first time in my life,I followed it.
I slowly wrapped my arm around his frail body, holding him in a calming embrace.My hands slowly rubbed his back as I thought of something to say.

"Ssh.No one deserves your tears, Mikey.", I slowly uttered those words, not knowing how he'll respond.

I slowly rocked him back and forth for a while, and slowly, the racking sobs began to subside, until they ceased completely.
Delicately disengaging from my hug, his eyes went up to his glasses.

"Thank you.", he whispered as he wiped away the wetness and replaced his glasses."I am sorry about this.This must be very embarrassing to you.I mean, we barely even talk."

His cheeks turned a light pink as he let out a forced chuckle, and I felt my cheeks do the same.

"No, it's okay.", I slowly stood up."I think we better get back.They'll be worried about you."

"Yes , yes.You're right.", he agreed, sniffing.

He slowly stood up, and both of us began walking back to Frank's house, side by side.