Learning How to Swim

I walked into the office, mind completely blank. I saw my sister sitting in one of the chairs, staring at her feet. She heard me shuffle in and glanced up at me, her pupils so dilated it was scary. Her hands were trembling and her eyes were darting around the room. It was then that I noticed my mother right behind me with Dad, both not looking too good.

“What’s going on?” I asked as the nurse left the room.

My mother took in a shaky breath, but Dad spoke for her. “It’s no one’s fault, okay?”

“What is going on?” I asked again, holding my stomach. I was going to throw up.

It turns out that a young woman had seen Kara sitting under the bridge out in the country. She wasn’t going to stop, but then she saw how young she was. She had asked Kara if she was okay, and she said no. When asked if she wanted help, Kara told her no again. Kara had been trembling, screaming at someone that only she could hear. She pulled her up, but Kara had screamed and flailed, dropping a bag.

The methamphetamine.

“You knew, didn’t you?” Mom asked me, going into a sudden delirium. “You knew, but you didn’t say anything! You tried to kill your sister! You knew she was cutting class, but you didn’t tell us! I bet you knew about the drugs, too!”

“I’m—!”

“No! No! You’re a selfish little witch!”

“Theresa, please,” Dad murmured, placing his hand on her shoulder.

She shrugged him off. “No! No, no, no! Look at Kara! Look at her! It’s all Alyssa’s fault!”

“You’re just saying that. You don’t mean it.” He tried comforting her again.

She pushed him away. “No! I am not just saying that!” She grabbed Kara’s hand and pulled her out of the office.

“I... I didn’t mean to hurt Kara,” I told Dad. I tasted water in my mouth, but no tears came.

“I know you didn’t. You just wanted to keep her safe. You probably tried to tell us, sweetie. We just weren’t listening.”

And Kara was off to Beckham.