Lost In You

I left the house feeling content and somewhat more informed. I seemed to be Gerard's only friend since no one else cared to speak with him. Now i felt even more obligated to speak with him since he seemed to enjoy the company. We could maybe move up from just friends to something else? I hitched a ride on the last bus of the night and headed home with a smile on my face.

I was his friend.

He was my friend.

My mom was still at work when I got home, she did evening shifts until eleven at a a fancy restaurant downtown. My dad on the other hand, well I didn't really know where he ended up. All I knew was that he was somewhere in the country with a new wife and probably a few perfect kids. I went up to my room and locked the door. I scanned the space and mentally compared it with Gerard's. My room seemed so lame compared to that place. I threw myself on my bed and kicked my shoes off. I sighed and stared at the ceiling without bothering to remove my hoodie.

With that visit today I just grew to like him even more and now I was dangerously on the verge of obsession if not already there. I rolled over and leaned over my bed and looked under neath. I pulled out my shoebox and sat up on my bed again with the box. I proceeded with opening it and pulling my favorite picture of Gerard. I bit my lip as I scanned it with my eyes. His facial structure was just... perfect. His teeth were small that only added onto my attraction for him. Maybe it was just lust but I wondered how his body looked. I knew he was pale but that was all. He wore a lot of layers on most days so I have never really 'seen' him. I found my hand slowly trailing down to my pants. I didn't take my eyes off of the picture and I unbuttoned my jeans and undid the zipper. I let my eyes slip shut for a moment as I kicked my pants off with a slight bit of difficulty. The boxers flew off moments later and my eyes resumed the action of gazing at the photograph. I imagined it was him doing this to me. My hand wrapped around my dick and I proceeded with teasing myself. I wanted him to do this to me. I bit back a moan as I imagined his lust filled eyes gazing into mine and whispering my name. A moan finally did slip between my lips but I wasn't worried. I was vocal. I sped up my actions so that my mouth was agape with pleasure and I couldn't even look at Gerard's image because I was so close to the edge.

"Gerard!" I moaned. "Fuck... me..." with that I spilled all over my hand. I stopped all movement and tried to catch my breath since I was breathing so hard. That felt so amazing but it would be better if Gerard were really here. He was an artist and could work with his hands so I bet he could perform magic with the same hands. I reached over and grabbed some tissue and proceeded with cleaning myself up. I pulled my boxers back on and stripped myself of my hoodie so that I was only in my boxers and a t-shirt. I pulled the blankets over myself and looked at Gerard image again which I was holding the whole time.

"Goodnight Gee." and with that I kissed the paper and laid it on the pillow beside me where I always put it when I went to sleep.