Lost In You

After a hot shower, I slipped into my warm pajamas and a hoodie to keep warm. I made myself a cup of hot chocolate and sat down in front of the TV. My mom was working really late tonight so I got the house to myself. I began to think about Hayden and Gerard. Who was the right one? The scary vampiric- like boy who frightened me or the quiet outcast who let me gain his trust? Two boys but I could only have one... only one. I looked at the clock and saw that it was only six in the evening, the storm made everything seem so late. I thought for a moment and took a sip of my drink. I flipped on the TV but in moments all the lights on the house including the TV shut down. I jumped in surprise and just sat there. The storm knocked the power out.

"Perfect..." I mumbled. "Just perfect." I placed my hot chocolate on the coffee table and carefully stood up. I slowly made my way over to the kitchen. Without injuring myself on my journey, I reached the counter and opened the drawers looking for a flashlight. I dug one out and turned it on. It was dead. "Fuck." I mumbled. I found another and this time it flicked on. I scanned the room with the beam of light and instantly landed on a human face! I screamed and dropped the flashlight.

"Sorry dear, didn't you hear me come in?" my mother asked. I was breathing heavily as I clutched my heart with my hand.

"You nearly gave me a heart attack!" I gasped.

"Sorry, they let me go early because of the storm." she said.

"That's cool." I mumbled.

"How was school?" she asked and used the flash light I found to rummage through the cupboards in search of potential dinner.

"Fine. " I lied. "The whole school got a detention today."

"Why?" she looked into another cupboard.

"Someone left a dead raccoon in the principals office and puked on his chair." I didn't mention it was me.

"Really?" she turned and looked at me to see if I was lying. "That's horrible!"

"Yeah." I agreed. "I'm going to head up to my room."

"Il call you when dinners ready." she smiled. I smiled back and carefully made my way back to the living room to retrieve my hot chocolate then I went up to my room. There was a storm light in the hallway in case the power went out, it lit the hallway despite the power outage. I walked into my room and looked out the window. The wind was howling and the rain pounded against the house. It was really spooky. Hayden's favorite weather...

I couldn't see Gerard's face because it was hidden behind his raven black hair. I really did love art class, it was so calming so... Hayden free. It felt like he couldn't read my mind here of hurt me because I was with Gerard but in reality, Gerard was as vulnerable as I was and he didn't even know it.

"Do you like me?" I blurted out. He raised his head, his eyebrows knitted in confusion.

"Like you how?" again we were early for class so we were alone, I loved these moments. Suddenly my courage deflated and I was blushing.

"Like... like..." I mumbled. His eyebrows shot up in surprise.

"Do I like you more then I friend you mean?" he asked, I nodded shyly. Now he was trying to hide either a smirk or a laugh, I couldn't tell.

"Hayden said it was clear you did..." I mumbled. I felt stupid now. Now he was smirking.

"He said I liked you?" now he was laughing. I felt really bad now. Maybe he didn't understand that I liked him? I sat there while he laughed. Then he abruptly stopped and watched me. I think he picked up on my mood.

"Do you?" I mumbled. I think he understood why I was asking. His hazel eyes studied me. Then he leaned back slightly and stared at his sketchbook.

"You like me." he stated. "That's why you're asking." he gasped as he suddenly understood. I always thought he was a smart boy. "...and Hayden hates me because he likes you and that's why he kissed you! He was trying to make me jealous because he thinks I like you because we hang out!" he shook his head. He hit the nail on the head with that one.

"So do you like me?"

"No." and my heart shattered.