Alexithymia.

Hundreds of thoughts whirled through Adeline’s head all at once as she strolled down the vacant sidewalk. Thoughts about her sister, thoughts about Alex, thought s about her parents, and thoughts about herpathetic life.

It was about forty degrees outside, but the cold didn’t seem to daunt Adeline, she was far too immersed in her thoughts.

Adeline couldn’t stand the way things were now. She couldn’t stand the way her life was. Everything was just so . . . so wrong.

It seemed like everyone that had once cared about Adeline, or that she had cared about were gone. Gone forever. Except Alex—he wasn’t gone forever. That didn’t matter; all those things Alex had said earlier, every single cruel word had hurt Adeline in a way nothing else had. Now it was clear to her why Alex was ignoring her—he thought she was some messed kid with no parents and some freak disease.

But none of that mattered now—Adeline just wanted everything to end.

Adeline walked to a local vacant park, collapsed onto the nearest bench, laid down, and brought her legs close to her chest. Before any tears escaped her eyes she shut them tightly as her breathing became uneasy. Adeline just wanted to forget. . .

~

Alex’s fingers furiously pressed at the keypad of his Side Kick. His fingers were dialing the numbers of Adeline’s cell phone. For the past three hours Alex had been trying to get a hold of her, but every attempt was a failed attempt.

Alex was desperate to speak to Adeline, for he desperately needed to apologize for the words he had said, or rather shouted, before.

Alex didn’t mean those things. He couldn’t have meant those things. He loved Adeline. He was in love with her. Nothing could change that . . . or so he thought.

The unpredictable sound of a fist tapping on Alex’s door just about made him jump off of his bed. His head whipped towards his door. There he saw his best friend, Jack Barakat, standing awkwardly.

“Hey Jack,” Alex’s tension relieved. “What’s up?”

“Adeline called me. . .” Jack said just as awkwardly as he stood.

Alex jumped to his feet, “She called you? Where is she? Is she alright? Does she hate me? How’s Addaleigh?” these words poured out of Alex’s mouth rapidly.

“Woah there, Alex,” Jack stepped further into the room. “Calm down, man.”

“Is. She. Okay?” Alex’s voice was laced with anger and agitation.

“Um, well why don’t you come with me and see for yourself,” Jack nodded his head down the hallway.

Adeline was here? Alex all but leaped off his bed and barked at Jack to take him to Adeline.

Jack had lead Alex downstairs into the living room. There Alex saw a frail frame of a starch-white girl lying limply on the couch. The girl appeared to be dead, as if all the life that had once filled this girl’s body had been drained.

Alex didn’t believe this girl was Adeline. It couldn’t be.

Alex warily made his way over to the couch to study the girl some more. As soon as Alex saw her golden-blonde hair he knew it was Adeline.

“A-Adeline?” his voice was barely above a whisper.

Her eyes didn’t open, she didn’t move, but she did speak four words—four words that hurt Alex in a way he never thought possible.

She said, “Please, let me die.”