Vampire Kiss

My eyes were squelched together, I blink open slowly, the light was dim but I could see everything in the room. I looked down at my limp body, still fully dressed? I was asleep but I was wearing casual clothes? I was lying on a couch, a big black leather one with green cushions. I sat up right, trying to revive some memory as to what happened and why I wasn’t wearing pajamas (or at least just some form of comfy clothing). Not to mention why I was sleeping on a couch. No wait. Why was I sleeping at all? I haven’t slept in weeks. It's physically impossible for a beast like myself to fall into a peaceful slumber. Trusting the first time I sleep in weeks to be the one time I don’t know where I am or how I got here.

A discrete shuffling came from the other side of the doorframe, the light was on but the room was shadowed. I peeled the worn out blanket off of my body, checking too see that I was wearing jeans and shoes, silently swinging myself off of the couch. The floorboards lightly creaked as my weight shifted around to gain my balance.

Inhaled the air around me and smelt nothing, only the dampness of the blankets that lingered on the sofa. I couldn’t hear exactly what was happening around the corner in the other room. I couldn’t see throughout the shadowed area, my sight had shifted back to normality. My senses had softened back to an endangered human. Along with my strength as I pushed myself off the sofa, taking so long to rise. Like an adult human who hates their pathetic business-suit office job, wandering over to the water cooler to see if their was anyone to talk to so they had an excuse to have a break.

I pressed my fingers against the wall to keep my balance and creep around the doorway, shifting onto non-croaky floorboards. I was just on the other side of the room now, but still I only heard a faint shuffling and a humming tune whistling softly. I couldn’t stand it any longer, mezmerised by the melody that drowned out the movement. I treaded softly around the corner, ready for anything coming my way.

“Morning, here I made you breakfast.”

“What?” I coughed and spluttered, so it came out more so like wahhh?

“Breakfast! Here, I hope you like eggs.”-then he broke into song- “How do you like you eggs into the morning?”

“Wait, what?”

He waved his little spatula thing as me to go on.

“I can’t eat eggs anymore.” I half sang back, hoping to get some sort of helpful response from him, finding myself engulfed in the familiar smell of scrambled eggs.

“Boiled or fried? - wait what? You don’t like eggs?”

“Yeah, I just can’t eat eggs.”

“Course you can.”

“No, they make me sick and who are you?”

“Oh dear, how rude of me. I’m Caden.” He lowered the spatula and held out his oven mitt to shake my hand.

“Why am I here? And where is here?”

“I like to call it home.”

“And why are you wearing an oven mitt to fry eggs?”

“Well, I always burn myself. If only I had the power to cook. Not that I don’t make the most amazing eggs or anything.”He winked at me from under his floppy brown hair.

“You didn’t answer my other question. Why am I here?” I had no power over him, no persuasion, no strength, no superhuman senses. “Are you a…?”

“A…? What? Vampire? Werewolf? Shape shifter? Zombie? Gargoyle? Demon? God? Banshee? Disney character? Princess?”

“I was going for vampire but Disney princess crossed with gargoyle seems more likely.”

“Hey! I think you’ll find I was prince charming yesterday.”

“And why might that be?”

“Well your safe now aren’t you.”

“What? So you thought you were saving me!”

“Well think about this. People hear your screams. Rush over. Send you to hospital. ‘Uhh, she doesn’t have a pulse’. You wake up in a freezing body bag in a morgue! Or even worse a coffin.”

I opened my mouth to respond but nothing happened, partly because I didn’t know what to say to that. He was right, weird, but right.

“Don’t worry or anything. Theirs no need to thank me.” He huffed dramatically, sweeping his floppy hair to the side as he turned back to the eggs.

“But that doesn’t explain why my strength has vanished along with my super human senses.”

“Well you didn’t expect them to just let me take you like that, did you?”-he rolled his eyes dramatically- “I slipped you a little something to make you appear human, it temporarily takes away your instincts, blood thirst and other senses…”He went on for a while. I let him serve me up some scrambled eggs (no lie, he was actually a great cook, he just burnt himself a lot) and let him go on about all those little random things, like how he puts a secret ingredient in his eggs because it runs through the family.

“So just to be clear, you’re a vampire?”

“Duh”

He seemed abnormally cool about his being a vampire an all.

“And you have all your senses and stuff right now, yeah?”

He nodded, bopping his cute baby face, I noticed how tall he actually was when he stood up to take away the dishes, a hole head higher than me.

“So when do I get mine back?”

“Give it a few days, I gave you a pretty light dose anyway. Meanwhile you can crash here.”

“Umm, thanks.”

“Its about time.” He laughed to himself. I didn’t what that was supposed to mean, whether it was about time I thanked him or it was about time I got everything. I wasn’t sure.

***

I slept easily last night, I got to know Caden a little better, well, not really. I don’t think I got that much out of him that was important, just random things like favourite colours, what he does in his spare time. I didn’t really want to pry in why he lives in such a small place that had damp blankets and very little belongings. After all he had kind of rescued me, and it did feel nice to be rescued, a whole lot of weight had been lifted off my shoulders, I didn’t feel the need to go rushing off anywhere. He cooked me my meals even though he wasn’t eating any of it (apart from eggs). I have to admit he was a talented cook, maybe that’s one of his hobbies or something? I don’t know. He’s hard to figure out, I woke up this morning, once again to the smell of eggs but I could have sworn he left last night. I was too dreary too notice anything different, after all it was the best sleep I’d had in ages (well the only one really).

“Morning.”I stretched out my limbs in a yawn.

“Hey.”

“I could do that” I went to take the spatula from his hand but he batted it away playfully.

“Ah-ah-ah! You sit down miss, I make much better eggs than you.”

He poked his tongue out at me childishly.

“Oh really?”

“Yes, really.”

I started taking plates out just for something to do. Setting up the metal mini table set with only two chairs. He served up my eggs on some lightly crisped toast, pinching some for himself. I couldn’t help but smile at his mischievous grin as he chomped on his toast.

“You know what?” He half choked as he swallowed.

“Swallow your food before you start talking?”I smirked.

“No. I’m going to take you out today.”

“Why? You hardly know me.”

“I know enough to know you're not a psycho vampire slayer. I also know you’re a pretty lady and you're cooped up in a crap apartment.”

“If you think its so crap then why do you live here?”

“It's only temporary. C’mon lets go.”