Apology Accepted

I gripped Sam's hand in mine, swinging it in the air as we walked around the downtown part of Sheffield. I looked at Sam, all bundled up in a sweat shirt, coat and scarf. She'd also securely wrapped one of my beanies around her head, making her hair stick out in odd places. Her face was uncovered, turning red against the cold air. Her eyes were so blue, because of the brightness of the sun reflecting off the snow.

"Are yeh excited?" I asked.

"Of course!"

"Yeh know what yeh want yet?"

She shook her head, "Not really. I mean, I have an idea. But, I do know that I want it to have something to do with us."

"Yeh don't 'ave teh--"

"I know I don't." She said, cutting me off, "I want to."

I grinned at her, squeezing her hand tighter, "Well if that's what yeh want Doll."

It meant so much to me that Sam wanted a tattoo that had at least something to do with me. It gave me a sense of confidence, knowing for a fact she honestly cared about me and loved me that much. Some people refuse to get tattoos that remind them of someone else, in fear of the fact that they'll no longer want them later. That is, unless that person is dead. Tattoos don't wash off. They're there forever. Which means Sam, if she doesn't want to stay mine, at least wants to remember me. She wants to look at that tattoo and remember who I was.

"Yeh wanna get somethin' teh eat first?" I asked.

"How about after?" She paused, "I don't want to get sick or something."

"Well alright." I grinned.

We walked past a few more shops and stopped in front of the tattoo shop. I pushed the door open and pulled Sam in behind me, looking around for Justin.

"'Ey Olleh!" Justin yelled, poking his head out of the back room, "Yeh in fer some more ink?"

I shook my head, pulling Sam from behind me, "She is."

Justin wiped his hands on a white towel and walked across the shop, holding out his hand for Sam to shake, "Who 'er yeh?"

"I'm Sam." She smiled.

Just looked at me, grinning, "Aye. She's right cute Ols."

I chuckled, looking down at Sam, who'd dropped his hand and let a furious blush take over her cheeks.

"Yeh ever get ink done, Doll?"

She shook her head.

"Any piercings?"

"I've got microdermals in my hips."

He nodded, "So yeh know 'ow teh take care of somethin' like this? Yeh just let it breathe and make sure yeh wash it every once in a while with non scented soap and some lotion."

"Yeah, I can do that."

"Well then," He said, clapping his hands together, "Yeh know what yeh want?"

"Kind of." She paused, "Do you have any books I can look through, maybe?"

Justin nodded, pointing towards a stack of tattered tattoo books and Sam made her way over to them, opening the one on the top.

Justin tapped me on the knee, "What're yeh bringin' in birds all the way from America now?"

I laughed, "She's 'ere teh visit."

"She best not be like that last bird yeh brought in 'ere."

"SJ?"

He nodded, "She was a whiny tit. I swear, I 'ate tattooin' whiny girls. They're so damn annoyin'."

"Yeah," I replied, "They are. But I 'ighly doubt Sam will give yeh any trouble. She's tough."

"What're the two of yeh doin' in 'ere the day after Christmas?"

"This is 'er Christmas present."

"Yeh spoil girls I swear. Yeh best not ever 'ave any kids. If they're birds, yeh're gonna be one poor dude."

I laughed at Justin, looking over my shoulder as Sam walked over to us again.

"Okay." She said, grinning down at me, "I figured out what I want."

"Well, show meh." Justin said.

"It's not a picture. I just thought of it while I was over there."

Justin leaned over and grabbed his sketchbook and pencil, opening it to a clean page and looking up at her, "Alright. Go."

"So I want these two skeletons, okay?" She paused, looking out the window, "One a boy and the other a girl. And I just want them sitting together, like side by side, so you can tell they're a couple. And I want them to be smoking." She stopped talking and looked down at both of us, who sat there with our mouths slightly open, "What? Is that stupid? Maybe don't have them smoking, I mean--"

"Aye, calm down love. It ain't stupid. I just never 'eard of a tattoo like that before. Yeh see it somewhere?"

She looked at me and turned back to Justin, shaking her head, "No."

"Where do yeh want it?"

"On my stomach."

"Well, gettin' the cigarettes in there might be 'ard, and it's gonna be a lot of detail, but 'm gonna do it."

"Thank you!" Sam practically squealed.

Justin chuckled at her and turned around, placing his pad of paper on the desk and began drawing. After spending about thirty minutes curled up with Sam in my lap and looking through some tattoo books, I still hadn't figured out exactly how Sam and I related to the tattoo she was getting. But, that didn't matter. Justin had started preparing everything and Sam was now lying back on the tattoo chair, a nervous grin on her face as she exposed her stomach.

"Alright Doll. This ain't gonna feel amazin', but it won't 'urt that bad, unless yer a right twat."

She laughed, glancing over at me, "I think I'll be okay. If Oli can handle it, I'm pretty sure I can."

I crumpled up a ball of paper and tossed it at Sam, "Yeh best hush up, or else I ain't buyin' yeh lunch!"

She stuck her tongue out at me and fixed her gaze on the ceiling as the tattoo gun started up. She placed her arms over her head and closed her eyes, flinching every once in a while. I didn't blame her, getting your stomach tattooed sure has hell doesn't feel good. Nonetheless, just as I'd suspected, I didn't hear her bitch once. She asked a couple times how much longer it would take, but I knew she was asking because she was impatient. And I'd guessed she was probably hungry. Seeing as how we'd woken up at about eleven and left the house after showering. Everyone was still in Christmas mode, seemingly oblivious to Tom and Audri's current situation.

But it probably didn't mean as much to everyone as it did me. While Audri's and Tom's problems were being solved, mine were starting up again. Which was only because Sam was leaving with Marilyn once the adoption papers were signed and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it.

I glanced over at her, still laying down and she grinned at me, holding her thumbs up in the air. I chuckled lightly and picked a string on my pants, doing my best to dismiss the fact she was leaving so soon. Audri and Tom's baby was being passed over to Marilyn so it wasn't like we'd never see each other again, there was no way in Hell I'd let that happen. And she didn't seem to want that to happen either. And as much as she shied away from the situation, or acted like everything would be alright, I still knew the real Sam. And she was scared. Insecure and scared. Unfortunately for me, when Sam is scared, she runs. And even though she's forced to leave this time, I have a bad feeling part of her wants to leave. Which upsets me, and I wish I could do something, but I can't. I just have to live with the fact that I know Sam loves me, but there are things more important in her life right now.

Before I noticed it, Sam was standing up, looking at her tattoo in the mirror. She laughed excitedly as she turned to me, "Oli? Do you like it?"

"Love it Doll. Told yeh Justin does a good job."

She beamed and walked over to me, "Thank you so much."

"You're welcome Love, say thanks to Justin."

We walked over to the counter as Sam reapplied her bandage and pulled her shirt down. I handed Justin the money I owed him and Sam said thank you about four more times before we left the store, the bell jingling behind us. The sun was out now and most of the snow had melted, seeing as how we were in the shop for at least three hours. Sam slipped slightly on a patch of ice and squealed, gripping my hand and bracing herself against the wall.

"Whoa there. Calm down!" I laughed, "Yeh're gonna kill yerself!"

"That was the best Christmas present I've ever gotten." She said, standing up straight and kissing me on the jaw, "Thank you."

"Yeh're welcome, Love. But I think yer's was better."

She shook her head, "I don't think so."

"What made yeh wanna paint meh somethin'?"

She shrugged, "I wanted to give you a present that actually meant something. I mean, as long as nothing bad happens to it, you'll have it forever."

"I'd never let anythin' bad 'appen teh that Sam, 'ts incredible."

She merely looked up at me, smiling. I could tell another blush was creeping to her cheeks, so I just kissed her on the top of the head and continued walking down the sidewalk with her. We walked in silence, besides the occasional couple strolling past us, the clinking of store bells, or a car driving down the road. I kept my eyes peeled for a shop to eat at, wondering why in the hell it was becoming so hard to find what I was looking for.

"Are we going to eat soon?" Sam mumbled, looking at me.

"Yeah, 'm just tryin' teh find," I paused, looking across the street, "Aye! There it is!"

I dragged Sam across the street and held open the door to Patti's Pasta. We walked into a pretty busy atmosphere and found ourselves sitting in a quiet corner, with two small menus.

"What're yeh gettin'?" I asked.

Sam surveyed the menu one more time, "I think I want the alfredo."

"Yeh best not be gettin' that 'cause it's cheap."

"I'm not, I swear!"

"Okay," I grinned, taking a drink of my ice water.

Shortly after, we ordered. We both ate in a comfortable silence, minus the few bits of small talk we made with one another. I swallowed a bit of water and started chewing on an ice cube. I pushed my plate away from me and put my hands on the table, looking at Sam.

I nodded towards her stomach, "It itchin' yet?"

"Not really. It just burns a little bit. I want to look at it again."

I grinned, "Yeh really like it, huh?"

"I love it."

"I'm glad. Tattoos always look so much better on skin than they do on paper." I grinned slightly, "It looks so hot on yeh Sam, I swear. I thought yer 'ips were hot, and now yeh've got that tattoo, and mmm."

"Stop it!" She laughed, "You're making me want to look at it really bad."

"Well, do it then."

"Not in the restaurant." She laughed, "I don't want you getting uncomfortable."

"Here." I said, leaving money on the table, "We'll go outside then."

Once outside, Sam held her coat over one arm and lifted up her sweatshirt. She peeled back the gauze, looking at it. As I peered at it, I realized just how sexy it looked on her stomach, right between her hip piercings. I had to practically hold myself down. I wanted to jump her so bad, just throw her up against the wall and shove my tongue down her throat.

"Are yeh gonna tell meh 'ow that 'as anythin' teh do with us?" I asked, after she'd put her shirt down and buttoned her coat up again.

She grabbed my hand as we started walking, "You'll think it's lame."

"No I won't. What'd I tell yeh 'bout bein' so insecure?"

She laughed slightly, "Okay. I'll tell you."

After a few seconds of her not saying anything, I squeezed her hand a little tighter, "'m waitin' Doll."

"Well, they're a couple. Which is me and you..." She trailed off, seeming to think of a reason.

"Why'd yeh make 'em skeletons?"

"'Cause," She paused, "Skeletons are already dead. They've found who they love and they know that's the only person they're ever going to truly love," She stopped, looking down at the ground, "And if I'm gonna be honest with you here, I have to tell you that's how I feel about you."

Again, her sentence stopped. And I didn't know what to say to her. I wasn't sure if there really was anything I could say to her that would even be equivalent to what she'd just told me. I was literally speechless.

"…And they're smoking because you're the only person that I like to smoke with."

I looked down at her, tears glistening in her eyes and I squeezed her hand tighter, feeling sick to my stomach, "Yeh're the only person I like doin' anythin' with Sam."