I'll Be Your Girl

The rest of the night runs smoothly, meaning I didn’t have any more emotional freak-outs. I don’t know what happened there on the red carpet. Maybe some of my hair bleach had seeped through my skull and coddled my brain or something. Anyway, the boys won a few awards and even Frankie was presented with a Breakout Star award, which was cute. I was introduced to a bunch of people I’m never likely to talk to again, but they all seemed pretty sweet. Jeez, they’re celebrities - why can’t they be dicks like everyone expects?

In the limo on the way back to the hotel I rest my head on Nick’s shoulder, feeling like I could fall asleep here and now. “Did you have fun tonight?” he asks me through a yawn.

“Yeah, it was cool,” I mutter. “Kind of like junior prom, but with famous people.”

Nick sighs. “I’ve never had a prom. But that’s okay,” he amends quickly, looking at his parents. “I’m living the dream.”

“Livin’ the dream, baby. Livin’ the dream,” Kevin echoes, and Joe agrees with a tired “here, here”.

“So lame,” I giggle, only to receive a poke in the ribs from Nick. We pull up at the hotel and pile out, waving to a few persistent fans before heading inside. Joe, Kevin, Danielle, Frankie, Denise, and Papa J pile into an elevator and hold it for us, but suddenly an idea occurs to me. “Uh, you guys go ahead,” I say, plopping down on one of the couches opposite the lifts. “I gotta get these heels off. They’re killing my feet.”

“I’ll wait with you,” Nick says as I begin to fiddle with one of the straps, even though I have no intention of taking them off. Joe shoots us a suspicious glance, but Kevin Snr merely nods and lets the doors slide closed, too tired to argue. As soon as I hear their lift leave, I get up and stab at one of the buttons in the wall, calling another one.

“What’s going on?” Nick questions as I grab his hand and pull him inside an empty one. I hit the button for the top floor.

“Consider tonight as your prom,” I tell him with a smile. “The ceremony’s over so that leaves…”

He looks at me blankly. “The food?” he tries, and I shake my head.

“No, the dance, you moron.”

“Oh,” he says, now with a smile. “Wow Remy, I didn’t know you could be so…” He searches for the word. “…feminine,” he finishes, and I punch him in the arm.

“Tonight’s different. I’m wearing a dress, in case you haven’t noticed.”

A faint pink tinge colours his cheeks. “Uh, I noticed,” he mutters.

“Yeah, so that constitutes for feminine behaviour, right?” I say quickly, not allowing myself to be bashful about his reaction.

He grins. “Guess so.”

Ding! We step out onto the top floor and I pull him to the stairs leading to the roof. It’ll be the perfect place for a prom dance. Genius, if I may say so myself. As we step outside I look around. The place is deserted, just as I’d hoped, and the only lights shining are the ones of the city and the stars above us, even if they are a bit blocked out by the smog. I turn a smile on Nick. “Care to dance, Mr Jonas?”

“It would be my pleasure, Miss Holloway.” He extends his hand to me and I take it, letting him lead me over to an open space, free of pool chairs. Through the dim light, I see his face fall. “There’s no music.”

Oh, I hadn’t thought of that. “Well,” I say, improvising, “you’re the musician. Make some.”

He laughs, readjusting his hand around mine and placing the other on my waist. I reach up to rest my free hand on his shoulder. “You really want me to sing to you?”

“Why not? You are my boyfriend, after all.”

He sticks his tongue through his teeth. “If that’s what you want, then okay. What do you want to hear?”

Before I can even consider it, my mouth is already speaking. “One Day at a Time,” I hear myself say, and an expression of understanding comes across Nick’s face. He knows that’s one of my favourite songs of theirs, because I relate it to dad. I didn’t even mean to, but when they first played it to me, I thought of dad and burst into tears. It had been a few years since his death and after that, it was one of the only times I’d let anyone see me cry. It’s no secret that I hate opening up to people, and crying is just the worst for me.

Nick doesn’t need to say anything, just launches straight into the song.

Wednesday I came home from school
Did my homework in my room
Then I watched some TV
I still miss you…

We sway slowly and I close my eyes, letting Nick’s voice slip into my head, my heart, my body. It sounds so different now that his voice has changed, but still as beautiful as I remember it.

Everything I do - ohh
It brings me back to you.

I sigh and rest my head against the top of his chest. He places my hand on his other shoulder, then wraps both of his arms around my waist, pulling me closer as he continues to sing to me.

And I die
One day at a time
Cause I just can’t seem to get you off my mind
No matter how I try
Try to kill the time
Well I think that I’m juts going crazy
One day at a time.

Even after the song ends we’re still in each others’ arms, still swaying. We continue to move like that for a time until Nick whispers my name.

“Remy?”

I lift my head and look up at him. “Yeah, Nick?”

He opens his mouth to speak, but shuts it again when he can’t find words. Instead he lifts a hand to stroke my cheek, his eyes softening at the touch. I’m not sure when it happened, but we’ve stopped moving now. We’re just standing here, staring at each other. Man, he’s beautiful, with his dark eyes and perfect curls. And the look on his face - it’s enchanted and enchanting at the same time. I take in a breath and feel him do the same, and the next moment our faces are moving closer. This moment feels so right, so--

“There you are!” The stair door has been flung open and there stands Joe, staring at us triumphantly. “I knew you’d be up to mischief.” Then he finally notices our proximity and grins smugly. “So cute together. Why can’t you two actually be dating?”

Nick and I, still frozen from the shock of it all, just stare back at him. Finally I step away, pulling myself out of the moment. I’m feeling kind of dazed. Did that really almost happen? Was that even a good idea? I press my lips into a thin line and walk towards Joe, forcing a smile on my lips. “I have no idea what you’re talking about, Joseph,” I say. “Oh but hey, I want to show you something. C’mere.”

I crouch down by the side of the pool and point into the water. Joe, the curious fool that he is, joins me. But as he looks in, trying to see what I was pointing at, I stand up quickly and place my palm flat against his back. Obviously thinking the same thing as me, Nick’s already on his other side in the same position. There’s a split second where we grin mischievously at each other before Joe’s toppling into the icy water, letting out a yelp as he does so. We step back as he resurfaces, spluttering and teeth chattering. “So c-cold!” he shrieks, flailing around for a few seconds out of panic, then he swims back to the edge and pulls himself out. “I hate y-you both,” he stammers, sending us a murderous glare.

Nick simply grins back at him. “That’s what you get for ruining my prom.”

“Au contraire, Nicky. I’d have to say this is the highlight of the night, don’t you agree?” I say slyly.

“Actually, I think you’re right,” Nick laughs, then Joe lunges. I double over with laughter as he lands on Nick, soaking his clothes as they tussle on the ground. But now Joe’s rolling off Nick and glaring at me, an evilness glinting in his eyes.

“You’re next, Holloway,” he hisses. I shriek and try to run away, but my heels don’t work in my favour as Joe quickly catches up, grabbing onto both of my wrists.

“No, Joe!” I plead, trying to twist out of his grip but failing. “Please just think of the dress! You wouldn’t want to ruin this, would you?”

He hesitates, and for a moment it looks as though he’s considering it as his eyes travel up and down my body, but then the malicious grin is back. “Yep,” he says simply before pulling me to him. He wraps his arms around me in a tight hug and I whimper as I feel the wetness seeping into my dress and over my skin. It’s freezing and I struggle to pull away, but this only makes Joe cackle and shake his wet hair in my face.

“Nick, help!” I cry out, but he’s standing off to the side, laughing as I was before. Damn Jonai. Suddenly I feel my feet lift off the ground and I realise with mounting dread that Joe’s carrying me back towards the pool. “No! No no NO! Joe, put me down! Put me down! This is not fair. Nick - HELP!”

“Joe,” Nick gasps through his laughter. “Maybe you shouldn’t--”

But it’s already too late. Joe’s arms loosen around me and then I’m falling, plunging into the icy water with an ear-piercing scream. It’s even colder than I’d imagined and I panic as I swim back to the surface, gasping for air when I finally reach it. “Joseph Adam, you’re going down!” I yell, swimming back to the edge and hoisting myself up. However, I’ve forgotten that I still have heels on, and they slip against the edge as I try to lift myself out.

“Here,” Nick’s bemused voice says above me, and he places his hands around my upper arms.

“Oh no you don’t,” I mutter and throw my weight backwards, pulling Nick back in the pool with me. “Deeply regretting not saving me now, aren’t you?” I jeer when we both resurface. He flicks his wet hair out of his eyes in order to glare at me. The dangerous look on his face makes me giggle nervously. I try to swim away quickly but he’s next to me in two seconds, fingers going for my waist and finding my ticklish spots first try. I yelp and splash about, struggling to get away. My limbs start to thrash and I completely lose control, which holds me entirely unaccountable for what happens next.

“Ungh!” Nick grunts painfully as my knee connects with something that feels suspiciously like his crotch. My suspicions are confirmed when he shrinks away, his face contorting in agony as he places his hands between his legs, all the while trying to stay afloat in the cold water.

“Oh shit,” I mutter, clapping a hand over my mouth. “I’m so sorry, Nick,” I say through my fingers, but I don’t think he can respond, he’s in so much pain.

“Oh my God, did you just--?” Joe questions, then lets out a bark of laughter. “Remy, I didn’t think you’d strike that low!”

I try to hold back my own laughter because really, the look on Nick’s face is too funny. If only he could see himself right now. “Shut up, Joe. Help me get him out of here,” I demand, gently pulling Nick to the edge of the pool.

“Sure he doesn’t need to stay in there? The cold water could ease the pain some,” Joe giggles.

“Just help me up, Joseph,” Nick says through gritted teeth, shooting a glare at his brother. It’s a bit of a struggle, but eventually we manage to pull him out and lay him on the ground, his face still twisted with pain. I kneel beside him and reach out to smooth my fingers across his forehead. “I’m so sorry, Nick,” I repeat, and he gives a tight nod in acceptance of my apology. “Is there anything I can do?”

Joe snorts. “Maybe you should offer to kiss it better,” he suggests in a fakely innocent tone, and even though both Nick and I are freezing, our faces heat right up.

“Shut up, Joe,” we say simultaneously, only making Joe laugh more.

After a minute or so Nick recovers a bit, and is able to roll out of the foetal position. “Oww,” he groans, squeezing his eyes shut. He hisses with pain as he sits up, and I bite my lip guiltily.

“I really am sorry, Nick,” I sigh, but he holds up a hand.

“I’ve already forgiven you,” he says, and I wrap my arms around his chest from behind.

“In that case,” I mutter into his ear, “you should have seen your face. So funny.”

He lifts a shoulder, nudging my chin. “Shut up, Remy. You try getting kicked in the balls sometime. It is not funny.” He shifts uncomfortably as he’s reminded of his pain, and I give his shoulders one last squeeze before standing up.

“I’ll keep that in mind for when I become transgendered,” I say, my tone mockingly serious. “But it’s getting really cold up here. Do you think you can walk?” I draw my arms tight around me, feeling the goosebumps that are raised along them.

Nick holds up his hand. “I’ll try. Help me up.”

I wrap my fingers around his as Joe moves to Nick’s other side, and we slowly but surely get him to his feet. “Showing weakness at last, little brother,” the older Jonas sniggers as he loops one of Nick’s arms around his shoulder.

“I’m not weak,” Nick grumbles, finding his footing then pulling away from Joe. “See?” And he remains stubborn like that, refusing to let me or Joe help him as we move back inside. That’s the thing about Nick: as soon as someone makes a comment like that, he immediately puts up a front. Not with anyone, though. He couldn’t care less if a random stranger said it in passing. The people he cares most about are the close ones, the ones that get under his skin. It’s as if he has to prove himself, even though we already think the world of him. It annoys me mostly, but I don’t challenge it. That’s just the way Nick is; the way he thinks and functions. Who am I to take it away?

Papa J’s waiting in the hallway for us when we reach our floor. He doesn’t say anything, but the look on his face as he eyes our drenched clothes speaks volumes. “Night,” I say hastily, then disappear into my room to escape his gaze. A few seconds later I hear Joe and Nick’s door close and Kevin’s footsteps retreating down the hallway. I look down at my shivering body and grimace at the soggy look of my once beautiful dress. I hope it’s not ruined. When I get home I’ll take it straight to the dry-cleaners, but for now, I really need to get warm.

Once I’m showered and comfortable in my PJs I crawl into bed, my eyelids beginning to droop with my tiredness. It takes me a little while to get to sleep though, because somehow my mind has returned to the slow dance with Nick. I know I’d been so ready to kiss him if Joe hadn’t shown up, and that scares me. When and how had I developed such feelings for him then, and why am I so weirded out now? Was it just something that had us caught in the moment? Most importantly, what’s Nick thinking about it?

I strain my ears in the darkness, and a moment later I think I hear a knock at my door. Moving quickly across the carpet I go to answer it, but the hallway is empty as I peer out. Shit, is this what I’ve resorted to, all because of one tiny moment? I shake my head and close the door quietly, so as not to disturb anyone else. I have to stop letting my mind get away from me. Nick and I are just friends, and that’s all we’ll ever be. I’d know if I felt something - something real - for him by now.

Still, I wonder why he hasn’t made up some lame excuse to crawl under my covers and hold me tight, like he usually does.