Dirty Little Secret
I Should've...
Gerard’s POV
It was three years ago when they met. My brother was intrigued by this young, quiet boy, who hadn’t so much as looked in our direction since he had arrived. He wasn’t alone; he had three friends with him. But I really didn’t know anything about him. I was rarely the observer; that was always my brother. It was usually me that initiated the conversation, but while I tried to get the measure of this young male, my brother had already taken the first steps and walked across the room, sat beside him and spoken.
”Hey there, I’m Mikey.” A hand was offered, taken, shaken, and released.
”Ryan.”
And that was the start of a friendship. I didn’t understand it then. I don’t understand it now.
I should’ve stopped it before it started and spoken first.
Let me know that I’ve done wrong
When I’ve known this all along
I go around a time or two
Just to waste my time with you
Frank’s POV
It’s been about two years since they started sleeping together. I remember Mikey coming to me and asking me about it. He was worried because he couldn’t get this kid out of his head.
I did the most stupid thing I could’ve done. I told him to go for it. Don’t worry about Alicia unless either relationship becomes something serious. Looking back on it now, I wish I hadn’t. I should’ve just kept my mouth shut.
I remember watching him approach the kid. I remember their conversation perfectly.
“Ryan, remember what we talking about?”
“Yeah…?”
“I think we should give it a shot.”
And just like that, Ryan’s face lit up. First he glanced around, checking there was no one that would call them on it. Then Mikey slipped his fingers around Ryan’s chin and lifted his face, leaning down and kissing him.
I should’ve kept my mouth shut.
Tell me all that you’ve thrown away
Find out games you don’t wanna play
You are the only one that needs to know
Ryan’s POV
It’s been a little under two years since I asked him to give up his girlfriend for me. I had dumped mine; I wanted to know if he’d do the same for me.
“I don’t see why it has to be a secret.”
“This isn’t exactly something we could broadcast to the world. Think about our labels, what they would say, our bands, our families.”
“So, this has to be a secret then.”
“Yeah, it does.”
“What about Alicia? I dumped Kelsie, are you going to ditch Alicia?”
“I don’t know if I should yet…”
“When you’re ready then…as long as you pick me over her…”
“I promise you, I will.”
I should never have asked.
I’ll keep you my dirty little secret
Don’t tell anyone
Or you’ll be just another regret
I hope that you can keep it
My dirty little secret
Who has to know?
Ray’s POV
It’s been a year and a half since I caught Mikey lying to his brother. Well, I say that, but at the time, I had no idea Mikey was lying. Of course I didn’t. Everything was a secret with him recently, but then again, it wasn’t much of a change from normal Mikey.
“So what’s going on then?”
“Nothing Gee.”
“Are you sure? You and that Ross kid seemed pretty chummy.”
“Gee, I told you, I’m with Alicia.”
“Alright Mikes. Fair enough.”
I should’ve backed up Gerard and continued the questioning.
When we live such fragile lives
It’s the best way we survive
I go around a time or two
Just to waste my time with you
Spencer’s POV
It’s was about a year ago that Ryan told me about Mikey. I was surprised to begin with, but it was obvious that Ryan had serious feelings for him, so I let him talk to me. I was his best friend after all.
“It’s just not fair… he said that if we don’t keep it secret everything will fall apart, but I don’t see how, I mean, yeah, sure, he’s relationship with Alicia will be no more, but he told me he was going to dump her anyway. So what’s the big deal?”
“Ry, have you ever thought that you’re getting played?”
“What do you mean?”
“It sounds like it has to be a secret because he has no intention of giving everything up for you.”
“Well, he did say I shouldn’t tell anyone… but I don’t think he’d do that…”
“Just think about it Ry.”
I should’ve told him to end it.
Tell me all that you’ve thrown away
Find out games you don’t wanna play
You are the only one that needs to know
Bob’s POV
It was about nine months ago that Mikey told me he had proposed to Alicia. I knew then, something was wrong with this situation. He didn’t seem nearly happy enough. But then again, Mikey never really bounced around or anything.
“Me and Alicia are getting married.”
“Congrats Mikes.”
“Yeah, it’ll be great.”
“Is something wrong?”
“Just nerves I think. Nothing major.”
“Alright then, going to Starbucks. I’ll talk to you later.”
I should never have let it go so easily.
I’ll keep you my dirty little secret
Don’t tell anyone
Or you’ll be just another regret
I hope that you can keep it
My dirty little secret
Who has to know?
Brendon’s POV
It was exactly six months ago I walked in on the biggest argument I had ever seen. Mikey versus Ryan. I was all ready to jump in on Ryan’s side, until I heard what it was about.
“YOU PROMISED ME! YOU PROMISED ME YOU’D GET RID OF HER!”
“Ryan, baby, it’s not that simple…”
“IT IS THAT SIMPLE! IT’S HER OR ME!”
“Why should it be?! HUH? YOU’RE ALWAYS SAYING THIS!”
“BECAUSE I THOUGHT YOU WOULD HAVE DONE IT BY NOW!”
“I’M NOT GOING TO CHOOSE BETWEEN YOU TWO!”
“FINE!”
Ryan picked up his jacket from the back of a chair, and left in a hurry.
I had just witnessed an argument I shouldn’t have.
I should’ve chased after Ryan and calmed him down.
The way she feels inside
Those thoughts I can’t deny
These sleeping dogs won’t lie
And now I’ve tried to lie
It’s eating me apart
Trace this lie back
Jon’s POV
It was two months ago that Ryan moved in with me. He said he wanted someone to be around that he wouldn’t get sick of, and he’d get sick of Spencer.
I let him.
One night I found him curled up on my sofa, murmuring to himself about ‘how it all began’. I listened to him that night and worked everything about Mikey and his relationship out for myself.
I should’ve sent him home.
I’ll keep you my dirty little secret
Don’t tell anyone
Or you’ll be just another regret
I’ll keep you my dirty little secret
Don’t tell anyone
Or you’ll be just another regret
I hope that you can keep it
My dirty little secret
Who has to know?
Who had to know?
Mikey's POV
It’s been two days since he told me he loved me. We were standing in the roof garden at Frank’s apartment block in New York. He looked so gorgeous that day. He had a long sleeve shirt on, with his black and white scarf, his green hat and his hobo gloves. Perfect Ryan. He walked over to the edge of the building and looked down into the traffic.
“Have you ever wanted to fly?”
“You make me fly Ryan…”
“You never dumped her.”
“No.”
“You married her instead.”
”Yes.”
He straightened up and turned to face me.
”I love you Mikey Way.”
I didn’t notice him step back until it was too late.
I should’ve said it back.
I should’ve chosen him over Alicia.
I should never have listened to Frank.
I should always let Gerard do the talking.
What do people THINK?
It was three years ago when they met. My brother was intrigued by this young, quiet boy, who hadn’t so much as looked in our direction since he had arrived. He wasn’t alone; he had three friends with him. But I really didn’t know anything about him. I was rarely the observer; that was always my brother. It was usually me that initiated the conversation, but while I tried to get the measure of this young male, my brother had already taken the first steps and walked across the room, sat beside him and spoken.
”Hey there, I’m Mikey.” A hand was offered, taken, shaken, and released.
”Ryan.”
And that was the start of a friendship. I didn’t understand it then. I don’t understand it now.
I should’ve stopped it before it started and spoken first.
Let me know that I’ve done wrong
When I’ve known this all along
I go around a time or two
Just to waste my time with you
Frank’s POV
It’s been about two years since they started sleeping together. I remember Mikey coming to me and asking me about it. He was worried because he couldn’t get this kid out of his head.
I did the most stupid thing I could’ve done. I told him to go for it. Don’t worry about Alicia unless either relationship becomes something serious. Looking back on it now, I wish I hadn’t. I should’ve just kept my mouth shut.
I remember watching him approach the kid. I remember their conversation perfectly.
“Ryan, remember what we talking about?”
“Yeah…?”
“I think we should give it a shot.”
And just like that, Ryan’s face lit up. First he glanced around, checking there was no one that would call them on it. Then Mikey slipped his fingers around Ryan’s chin and lifted his face, leaning down and kissing him.
I should’ve kept my mouth shut.
Tell me all that you’ve thrown away
Find out games you don’t wanna play
You are the only one that needs to know
Ryan’s POV
It’s been a little under two years since I asked him to give up his girlfriend for me. I had dumped mine; I wanted to know if he’d do the same for me.
“I don’t see why it has to be a secret.”
“This isn’t exactly something we could broadcast to the world. Think about our labels, what they would say, our bands, our families.”
“So, this has to be a secret then.”
“Yeah, it does.”
“What about Alicia? I dumped Kelsie, are you going to ditch Alicia?”
“I don’t know if I should yet…”
“When you’re ready then…as long as you pick me over her…”
“I promise you, I will.”
I should never have asked.
I’ll keep you my dirty little secret
Don’t tell anyone
Or you’ll be just another regret
I hope that you can keep it
My dirty little secret
Who has to know?
Ray’s POV
It’s been a year and a half since I caught Mikey lying to his brother. Well, I say that, but at the time, I had no idea Mikey was lying. Of course I didn’t. Everything was a secret with him recently, but then again, it wasn’t much of a change from normal Mikey.
“So what’s going on then?”
“Nothing Gee.”
“Are you sure? You and that Ross kid seemed pretty chummy.”
“Gee, I told you, I’m with Alicia.”
“Alright Mikes. Fair enough.”
I should’ve backed up Gerard and continued the questioning.
When we live such fragile lives
It’s the best way we survive
I go around a time or two
Just to waste my time with you
Spencer’s POV
It’s was about a year ago that Ryan told me about Mikey. I was surprised to begin with, but it was obvious that Ryan had serious feelings for him, so I let him talk to me. I was his best friend after all.
“It’s just not fair… he said that if we don’t keep it secret everything will fall apart, but I don’t see how, I mean, yeah, sure, he’s relationship with Alicia will be no more, but he told me he was going to dump her anyway. So what’s the big deal?”
“Ry, have you ever thought that you’re getting played?”
“What do you mean?”
“It sounds like it has to be a secret because he has no intention of giving everything up for you.”
“Well, he did say I shouldn’t tell anyone… but I don’t think he’d do that…”
“Just think about it Ry.”
I should’ve told him to end it.
Tell me all that you’ve thrown away
Find out games you don’t wanna play
You are the only one that needs to know
Bob’s POV
It was about nine months ago that Mikey told me he had proposed to Alicia. I knew then, something was wrong with this situation. He didn’t seem nearly happy enough. But then again, Mikey never really bounced around or anything.
“Me and Alicia are getting married.”
“Congrats Mikes.”
“Yeah, it’ll be great.”
“Is something wrong?”
“Just nerves I think. Nothing major.”
“Alright then, going to Starbucks. I’ll talk to you later.”
I should never have let it go so easily.
I’ll keep you my dirty little secret
Don’t tell anyone
Or you’ll be just another regret
I hope that you can keep it
My dirty little secret
Who has to know?
Brendon’s POV
It was exactly six months ago I walked in on the biggest argument I had ever seen. Mikey versus Ryan. I was all ready to jump in on Ryan’s side, until I heard what it was about.
“YOU PROMISED ME! YOU PROMISED ME YOU’D GET RID OF HER!”
“Ryan, baby, it’s not that simple…”
“IT IS THAT SIMPLE! IT’S HER OR ME!”
“Why should it be?! HUH? YOU’RE ALWAYS SAYING THIS!”
“BECAUSE I THOUGHT YOU WOULD HAVE DONE IT BY NOW!”
“I’M NOT GOING TO CHOOSE BETWEEN YOU TWO!”
“FINE!”
Ryan picked up his jacket from the back of a chair, and left in a hurry.
I had just witnessed an argument I shouldn’t have.
I should’ve chased after Ryan and calmed him down.
The way she feels inside
Those thoughts I can’t deny
These sleeping dogs won’t lie
And now I’ve tried to lie
It’s eating me apart
Trace this lie back
Jon’s POV
It was two months ago that Ryan moved in with me. He said he wanted someone to be around that he wouldn’t get sick of, and he’d get sick of Spencer.
I let him.
One night I found him curled up on my sofa, murmuring to himself about ‘how it all began’. I listened to him that night and worked everything about Mikey and his relationship out for myself.
I should’ve sent him home.
I’ll keep you my dirty little secret
Don’t tell anyone
Or you’ll be just another regret
I’ll keep you my dirty little secret
Don’t tell anyone
Or you’ll be just another regret
I hope that you can keep it
My dirty little secret
Who has to know?
Who had to know?
Mikey's POV
It’s been two days since he told me he loved me. We were standing in the roof garden at Frank’s apartment block in New York. He looked so gorgeous that day. He had a long sleeve shirt on, with his black and white scarf, his green hat and his hobo gloves. Perfect Ryan. He walked over to the edge of the building and looked down into the traffic.
“Have you ever wanted to fly?”
“You make me fly Ryan…”
“You never dumped her.”
“No.”
“You married her instead.”
”Yes.”
He straightened up and turned to face me.
”I love you Mikey Way.”
I didn’t notice him step back until it was too late.
I should’ve said it back.
I should’ve chosen him over Alicia.
I should never have listened to Frank.
I should always let Gerard do the talking.
What do people THINK?