Ghost.

Gerard and I had been siting in a comfortable silence for some time. The noise of the city had died down a little, leaving the lazy hum of late night traffic behind. I'd been desperately trying, in my head ,to piece together some memories of Gerard and I, but nothing was coming to me. I put it down to an accident I'd had soon after prom. My mother told me I'd fallen and hit my head giving me major concussion. Of course, I don't remember. I changed after that. Gerard had disappeared, and it was like I'd lost my whole life all at once.
'What are you thinking?' Gerard was slouched beside me, leaning on his hand. He reminded me of a boy, from a scene of a movie, leaning on his hand and desperately in-love with the person he was with. I smiled. 'Not a lot, I don't remember a lot'
'You wont' Gerard sat up 'Not after that nasty bump' He reached up to my forehead, where, under my fringe was a scar along my hairline.
'How do you know that's there?' I retracted, trying to push him away but putting my hands through him again.
'I guess your Mom told me, I don' t know' He shrugged, turning away and sighing. I watched him a while in confusion, realizing there must be something my stupid brain wiped from my memory. He was so beautiful, so innocent, just as he was then. I annoyed me how I could ever forget anything so stunning.
'Gee?' I whispered 'What happened to you?'

Frank had really rubbed me up the wrong way. In hindsight, I know it was totally unnecessary of me to go off like that but I needed him to understand me, and, more than anything understand himself.
'Amanda?' She was Franks 'date' to prom. I refused to go because of her, again, pathetic. But if I was having a drink before I got there heaven knows what I'd do. I'd flipped out earlier that day at Frank for taking her and told him I hated him, words he was too used t o. Obviously he ignored me, and all because I can't tell him two stupid tiny words.
The music was crap, and he sickly smell of fruit punch on the sticky floor was enough to drive me insane. No to mention the crazy array of brightly colored frilly shirts and huge dresses. I actually wanted to be sick.
Amanda's face twisted angrily when when she realized it was me, and she folded her arms in that girly defensive way. I bit my lip nervously.
'Where's Frank?' She demanded.
'He went home' I squeaked. She rolled her eyes and sighed.
'What the fuck did you say to him this time Gerard?' The look in her eyes said it all. I bet she thought I'd brutally murdered him and chucked him in a ditch.
'Nothing, I swear I didn't..' She waved her hand, cutting me off.
'Look, whatever you said it doesn't matter' She pushed me aside ' I like Frank, but I can't be doing with you in the way all the time. Just do everyone a favor and fuck him already' and she was gone, into the crowd of dancers.
'Ok..Sorry' I whispered to her back and left the dancehall, a streamer stuck to my shoe.

'So I don't know if you'll get this..Well you may get this..But, you might not even listen to it..not that I've said a lot. Just smoked cigarettes.. damn I've smoked a lot of cigarettes..don't fall over those in the morning..' his happened to be the longest answer machine message I'd ever left, and one that didn't make much sense at all. I was 2 am and I was groveling on Franks doorstep. 'I'm on your doorstep, but obviously you're not or you'd be talking to me..or perhaps not, because you don't like me' I heard a squeak and a latch but it didn't register. 'Well your door is opening..which means there's someone in..but it's not you. Oh my god i think you're being robbed..'
'I'm not being robbed you prick'
I jumped, throwing my phone a few feet in the process. I then looked up to see Frank, his shirt half unbuttoned and his tie gone. He looked tired.
'I thought you were ignoring me' I exclaimed as he helped me up and pushed me inside.
'I was, until you started getting really annoying' He locked the door behind him and I placed myself on the kitchen floor.
'Jesus have you been drinking?' Frank leaned over the counter and looked at me.
'Not that much' That was a lie, I'd had more than enough and was beginning to feel a bit sick.
'Oh my god Gerard' Frank sighed, getting a glass from the cupboard and filling it with water. 'every fucking time, seriously I can't keep helping you, one day i'll be old'
'And married' I added. He looked at me funny.
'I doubt that'
I leaned against the counter as Frank handed me the water and sat beside me.
'Good job y parents are away' He mumbled 'My mother trusts you with her life'
'Yes, but does she trust me with her son?' Franks face creased in confusion.
'Whats that supposed to mean?'
I didn't reply. Instead, I don't know what made me do it but I placed my hand on Franks thigh.
'Gerard what the fuck are you doing?' He leaped up, his face flustered and red. I shrugged, not fully aware of myself.
'I don't get it' Frank grabbed at his hair 'This whole thing...It's like you're obsessed with me or something?'
I just looked a him expecting me to say no, but the truth is, I couldn't argue with that.
'You're not obsessed with me are you?' He tried to laugh it off but I remained emotionless. I saw it dawn on him, his face fell as he realization hit him.
You're obsessed with me?' He slouched onto a stool, his voice was barely audible 'Aren't you?'
I just nodded. There was nothing left for me to do but agree with him.

Gerard scratched the back of his head nervously, waiting for my reply. I sniffed, close to tears as the memories of that moment came flooding back.
'I hated myself right then' Gerard whispered. 'When I told you, it was as if the whole world had just collapsed in your eyes'
Still, I remained silent, but looked at Gerard. 'Your eyes are like that now' He added.
I smiled, wiping them. 'No, these are just tears'
'You know, for 18 years, I don't think I ever saw you cry' Gerard whispered.
'Thats because you did enough for two' I chuckled.
'Oh shut up' Gerard brushed me off.
We were silent again, looking back over the city for the millionth time.
'Is that why you disappeared?' I mumbled 'Because you told me that. I didn't take it well?'
Gerard sighed. 'I wish, but you took it very well'