I'll Tear Down the Stars for You

As I got to the needed hotel room, a screaming was heard through the wooden door.

“I am! I’m just a huge fuck up!” I instantly began to panic. Is this a bad time? Should I just leave? No Ebony. Just knock. You need to do this. Slowly, I raised my hand and balled it into a fist, gently knocking against the door. I stepped back and waited for either Bill or Tom to answer it. But to my surprise, it was neither of the twins.

“Ebony?” I blinked as I stared back at Georg, my eyes slowly looking over his shoulder to see Gustav and Bill walking towards me, confused looks on their faces. “What are you doing here?” I didn’t respond, I just looked around the room until I found Tom sitting on this sofa, his head lifted to look right back at me. He had tear stains on his face. He had been crying? Oh God.

Georg stepped back to allow me to enter. But I didn’t move. I just stood where I was and stared right at Tom who stared back at me, no words were uttered. Tears leaked from my eyes and splattered onto the floor, but still no words were said. Silence was tying knots around me, and I couldn’t stand it.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, more and more tears falling down my soft cheeks. I kept my eyes on Tom as he looked away from me, gently shaking his head. I hung my shoulders. I was too late.

“Ebony,” Tom whispered, looking back up at me and standing up. I was waiting for him to walk away and tell me to fuck off, but instead he opened his arms out for me. “Come here,” I didn’t move. I wanted to, but I couldn’t.

“Go on,” Bill urged, gently nudging me in the back. I smiled at Tom and slowly walked over to him. As I got closer to Tom, my smile widened and my pace quickened until I had slammed into his chest, his left arm wrapped around my waist and his left hand gripping my hair as if he was scared of losing me... again. I sighed, breathing in his scent that I had always loved.

“I’m sorry,” I wept. I could feel my tears soaking through his shirt, but Tom stayed quiet and placed his forehead on the top of my head. The clicking from the door of the hotel room closed shut, but I didn’t move. I stayed wrapped up in Tom’s arms. “I’m so sorry”

“There is no need for you to be sorry,” he whispered into my hair. “You did nothing wrong.”

“But I feel so guilty,” I cried.

“Well don’t. None of this is your fault. I’m just a big ass jerk. Okay?” I giggled into his chest, sniffing slightly.

“Eugh. I don’t think I’ve ever cried so much and now I’m really embarrassed,” Tom’s chest vibrated as he gently chuckled at my words.

“Cry all you want,” he whispered, softly running his fingers through my hair. I shook my head and pulled away from Tom. My eyes searched Tom’s as no words were said. I watched as tears began to fill Tom’s eyes, but he quickly blinked them away and smiled at me. “You’re beautiful,” he whispered, stroking my left cheek and sitting down on the sofa behind him, gently taking my hands in his and pulling me down so that I was straddling him.

“I’m not beautiful Tom. And I’m pretty sure that my makeup is smudged everywhere,” I sighed, absentmindedly rubbing at my eyes, only to find that my fingers were now black from the mascara and eyeliner.

“Well I think you’re beautiful, and what I say goes,” I blushed at his words.

“Oh really? Is that how it works?”

“Yes it is because I am God,” I laughed in his face and poked at his ribs, earning a pout from Tom. “But on a serious note, I feel terrible.”

“Tom,” I interrupted.

“No. Let me finish,” he placed his right hand over my mouth, only for me to lick it. “Ew. You’re disgusting,”

“I try,” I smirked.

“Oh you try alr- Ebony stop distracting me,” I winked. “Anyway. As I was saying before you distracted me with your ways,” he winked back. “If I wasn’t such a jerk, we wouldn’t be here today. Like, with me trying not to cry, and you trying to get rid of your makeup from all the crying. And I know that underneath all this makeup, you’re covered in bruises. Because of me. And I’m so sorry. Hell, I’m more than sorry. But I don’t think there’s a word to explain how much,” I shrugged.

“This only happened because Olivia is a slut, and your little buddy perked up at the thought of being with her and that ruled me out. You were still young back then,” I grinned.

“That sounded so incredibly wrong,” Tom chuckled. “My little buddy perked up!” He laughed, pretended to wipe away an invisible tear.

“I know. It was supposed to sound like that,” I shrugged, leaning forward and placing my head on his shoulder. Tom instantly wrapped his arms around my waist.

“Ebs?”

“Hmm?”

“What exactly made you ditch the wedding to come here?” I sighed and sat back up so that I was looking Tom in the eyes again.

“I’ve been thinking this for a while. As in, thinking that marrying Mark was the wrong thing to do, but I thought it was too late to back out of it. And then at the altar, I was watching Mark say his vows, and he was sort of like, wincing and gulping as he said the words, and his face was slowly turning white. It was as if he didn’t want to be there, just like me. And then I knew that it was now or never. So as the priest started to say the words that I had to repeat, I stopped him and told him I couldn’t marry Mark and ran out of the hall and into the changing room to change into this. I didn’t exactly want to run in a wedding dress,” I laughed. “And now I’m here, on your lap telling you the story,” I shrugged as if it was nothing as Tom smiled wide at me.

“I’m so proud of you,” he grinned, patting my head.

“I thought you would be. I knew you hated Mark because I was with him and not you. It was blatantly obvious. And quite early on in the relationship, I knew it wasn’t right. But I couldn’t help myself. I was so pissed off with you, the thought of having a boyfriend and waggling him in your face felt so thrilling. And it was. It made me feel like I had hurt you as much as you had hurt me.”

“And you did,” Tom interrupted.

“Good. That was the plan. But yeah. I guess it sort of got a little too far and too much to handle and it all got turned into shit. But the kids were really beginning to miss you, and then they found out about what Mark was doing to me and they hated him with a strong passion. When I put Hayley and Emily to bed, they would often tell me how much they want you back in our family. Robbie would tell me when I’m taking him to soccer practice how much he hates Mark and wants you back. And I’m sure Megan told you herself.”

“Yeah she did. In fact, she had told me to come to the wedding and stop it part way through. But I just couldn’t do it. That’s why I’m dressed a little smarter than usual. I was dressed and about to leave this hotel room, but I just couldn’t do it. I couldn’t find it in myself to stop the wedding to take you back, because I knew Mark would do something to one of us or both of us, and, well. Yeah.”

“But I’m here now. It’s all going to be okay,” I leaned my forehead against Tom’s and slowly closed my eyes, enjoying the feeling of Tom’s warm breathe on my lips.

Soon, Tom began to hum to a song that I had recently heard Megan playing in her room.

“I was blind, didn’t know you hurt so bad. I saw inside, when everybody said I’m mad and, Ran away, never to be seen again, I found a friend, when all you need is just a friend, And all you need is a friend. I don’t want you to go, One million miles away, Let you know that it’s okay, I will bring you back home, Shelter you from the wind, Light a path with a burning flame, We can start with today.” Tom began to sing, but stopped.

“I was lost, time was moving by so fast, Felt alone cause I was living in the past and, I ran to you, hoping we could make amends, Cast away, when all I needed was a friend.” I sang back to Tom. I heard Tom take a breath as he continued to sing.

“I don’t want you to go, One million miles away, Let you know that it’s okay, I will bring you back home, Shelter you from the wind, Light a path with a burning flame, We can start with today”

“Would you take me by the hand?” I began to whisper as I sang the next part with Tom.

“I’m gonna take you by the hand.”

“Would you take me by the hand?” my voice cracked, but still no tears fell.

“Yeah,” silence. And then what seemed like hours, although it was only minutes, Tom began to softly sing again. “I don’t want you to go, One million miles away, Let you know that it’s okay. I don’t want you to go, One million miles away, Let you know that it’s okay, I will bring you home, Shelter you from the wind, Light a path with a burning flame, We can start with Today. We can start with today,” tears slipped down my cheeks as Tom kissed my forehead, his voice still ringing through my ears.

“Tom?” I sniffed.

“Yeah?”

“I love you,” I whispered, opening my eyelids to stare into Tom’s chocolate brown eyes.

“I love you too. I’m sorry for putting you through so much,” he whispered back.

“It’s okay. I forgive you,”

“Good. Because I don’t know what I’d do to get your forgiveness. I’d do anything to have you in my life. I’d even go to the lengths of tearing the stars down for you,” he gently kissed the tip of my nose and I grinned at him. He knew that I loved it when he did that.

“You’re so cheesy, Dork Kaulitz,” I giggled, poking him in the ribs again.

“Please don’t poke me. You have long nails,” he groaned.

“Sorry,” I giggled again, stroking his cheeks.

“Ebony?”

“Yes Tom?”

“Will you take me back?” I leaned into Tom and placed my lips against his. Instantly, Tom kissed back, his grip on my waist tightening. I pulled away seconds later and looked into Tom’s eyes once more.

“Always,” I whispered, gently kissing his lips again.