I Don't Want To Be In Love

October 5th, 2009

Dear Journal,
You’d think life was enjoyable once that one person you couldn’t stand. That one person that you hated and that hated you back became best friends would be well okay again. It was for almost half a year. Then she came around and ruined everything. Moreover, by she I mean Liberty Shillings and known as my cousin. However, I prefer to think of her as the Devil’s Daughter. Sure she’s just my cousin and why would I care, it’s not just that she started to date the one guy I actually fell for and then two days before my birthday I found out she was his Fiancée. So now, I need to paste on a smile and pretend everything is okay and that I’m happy for him. I’ll help him plan the wedding and keep my mouth shut when all I want to do is scream at the top of my lungs ‘I Love You’. I’ll pretend nothing’s wrong when people ask me. However, most of all I’ll pretend I’m not slowly breaking apart inside. Especially since I don’t want to be in love.