Lies

Bam!

“What the fuck?” I scream after making contact with the…floor? I raised an eyebrow as I glanced around my room. Had I fallen out of bed…again?

“Logan sweetie Damien will get here in a few minutes!” My mother shouts causing me to go into a panic. Not because I was scared he’d leave without me. Damien wouldn’t do that. I’m panicking because I am very self-conscience around him.

After all he’s the reason I questioned my sexuality in the first place.

Yeah, I know horrible right? I end up having a boy crush on my best friend who I know is straight. I sigh at the bad luck I have. There must be something in the air…

I stumbled around my room managing to savage a shirt, boxers, and jeans. I tripped the entire time while trying to pull them on. I heard Damien down stairs and I was praying that he didn’t get here until after I put my shirt on. Sadly, my bad luck was still here and Damien opened my bedroom door just as I pulled up my tight as hell jeans.

I give a toothy grin, which causes Damien to laugh. The laugh made my heart pound unusually fast inside my chest. My lips curled up into a smile as I watched the angel in front of me laugh at my “predicament.”

“Hey,” I greet hoping he couldn’t hear how breathy I sounded. The boy had and always will take my breath away with one glance.

“Morning,” Damien greets before leaning against the doorframe. Really did he have to always lean and look all fuckable like that? “Having fun?”

I didn’t realize he was talking to me until after I saw the raise of his brown eyebrow. Immediately I grinned out of embarrassment before I slipped my shirt over my head, extremely happy he couldn’t see my chest anymore, and answer, “Oh yes, lots.”

Damien chuckles lightly. It was such an adorable sound. Part of me wanted to just rip his clothes off and fuck him senseless now while the other, more rational part, knew that there was no way in hell that Damien would be sharing the same feelings towards me that I had for him. He just thought that we were friends, best fucking friends.

“Lets go,” Damien says before walking out of the room. I felt my shoulders slump as I followed behind him. Only friends, that’s what we are. Can I manage to stay that way though? Every year that has passed it’s been harder and harder to keep my crush obsession a secret.

It was seventh grade that I got the crush. As I got older it got worse. I started actually having wet dreams about him while he was at my fucking house! He’d get me hard with a simple touch. There were times that I had to excuse myself from whatever activity we were doing because he gave me a problem.

I was starting to wonder, maybe I should tell him? No I can’t. There was no way he’d accept me and there was no way in hell I was chancing giving up such an amazing friendship.

It’s better to be his friend then nothing at all right?

I hopped into Damien’s car before we drove off to school. At school my friends surrounded me. I had lots of them. I’ve always been popular with everyone. The girls wanted me and the guys thought I was pretty cool so that gave me a highs social status.

I’m pretty sure if I told everyone to roll over, they’d roll over. I never took advantage over the “power” I held though. I definitely wasn’t like that.

Damien and I sat in homeroom. As usual I got lost in his eyes and found out that I’d miss out on what he was saying. I’d just nod and make ‘hm’ sounds when I felt needed. That seemed to make him think that I was actually listening and not day dreaming about a life we could have together.

I sighed as yet another day passed without Damien knowing my true feelings. Another day passed without Damien knowing how much I really, truly loved him.