Six Long Weeks

Gerard sat staring out his window. He was lonely; he had been in this place for six weeks. Six long, boring weeks. He was waiting…waiting for his love to return. He hadn’t left his house since Frank stormed out yelling at Gerard, saying things like ‘You’re only taking me down with you’ and ‘I bet you love Vodka more than you love me’. It hurt Gerard to think about it. How could Frank think so low of him? Couldn’t Frank see that he was the only thing keeping Gerard alive? Gerard sighed as it started to get dark. Another day without Frank had gone by and Gerard would keep counting until he returned. Gerard slowly moved away from the window sighing to himself. He was beginning to doubt that Frank would ever come back. Frank probably is already with someone else; he’s probably already forgotten about him. Frank probably never loved him.

Gerard made his way to the bathroom and got out of his clothes. He turned on the taps on in the tub making sure that the water was at a perfect temperature. Once ready, Gerard slipped himself into the lukewarm water. As he watched the rippling the water made every time he moved he realized something. No one would care if he died. Mikey, Gerard’s brother, was in New York making something of his life. Gerard’s parents hadn’t spoken to him since he came out to them around a year ago. His Grandmother, Elena, had died about 9 months ago…that’s when the drinking had started. She was the only one who understood him, well, until he met Frank. Frank was Gerard’s world, but Frank had left so all that was left was an empty black hole.

The swirling water taunted him; he wanted to be in its depths, to feel its power…to end his worthless lonely life. He took a deep breath in before sinking lower into the tub. He was fine for a couple of moments, but then his lungs started to want air…air that he wouldn’t give them. His lungs started to sting and pain shot through him as things started to go black. He smiled, this was what he wanted…needed.

Suddenly air hit Gerard’s lungs. He groaned in frustration…he was so close! He opened his eyes slowly to see an angry Frank. He had to blink several times as to make sure that he wasn’t hallucinating from lack of oxygen.
“What the f**k were you thinking?” Frank yelled.
Gerard didn’t answer, Frank didn’t understand. He just clung to Frank, scared that if he let go Frank would disappear into the air. The sound of Frank’s heartbeat soothed Gerard more than anything in the whole world.

Gerard couldn’t remember how he got there, but he was in his pyjamas in his bed and Frank was standing next to him. He did not look happy.
“Why are you here?” Gerard asked in a small voice.
“I came to get my stuff,” he replied, his voice portraying no emotion.
Gerard’s hope was destroyed. Frank was only here to finalize the end of them…to get rid of any evidence that they were ever together. All was silent but for their breathing and the beating of two broken hearts.
“Why did you do it?” Frank asked breaking the sorrow filled silence.
Gerard looked at Frank.
“Why did you stop me?” He asked in a whisper.
Frank shifted uncomfortably. The expression on his face was hard and still filled with rage.
“Gerard…why?” he asked again.
Gerard didn’t say anything. Why should he? Frank didn’t care anyway! He just wanted him to suffer, that’s why he pulled him out of the tub. That’s why he left Gerard in the first place.

“Gerard, why the f**king hell did you try to drown yourself?” Frank yelled, snapping Gerard out of his dark thoughts.
Gerard stayed silent which made him even more furious.
“Tell me Gerard or I’ll call Mikey…or you’re parents,” he threatened.
“That would do nothing, no one cares about me Frank…no one,” Gerard murmured.
“You’re kidding right?” Frank hissed.
Gerard shook his head, which caused his head to ache.
“Are you that blind?” Frank snapped.
Gerard turned away from Frank…he couldn’t bear the pain.
“Why don’t you just leave?” Gerard growled.
Frank was shocked…Gerard wanted him to leave?
“Just get all your stuff and go!” Gerard snapped.
Frank didn’t move.
“LEAVE!” Gerard yelled.
Frank nodded and headed towards the closet still shocked at Gerard’s hostility. Gerard was shocked at himself…didn’t he want Frank to stay? Or was he scared of getting his hopes up for them only to be crushed by Frank’s small hands?

Frank came back from the closet with a small big filled with clothes.
“Gee…” he started.
“Don’t!” Gerard hissed at the sound of the nickname on his ex-lovers tongue.
Frank ignored Gerard and sat down on the bed.
“Geebear,” he cooed, his hand grasping Gerards.
Gerard tried to pull his hand away nut Frank had a firm grip and wasn’t letting go. He gave up, but refused to look at Frank.
“Come on Gee, please look at me,” Frank begged, no trace of rage in his voice…it had been replaced with sadness.
“Gee, why tonight? Why did you choose tonight? Frank asked the curiosity clear in his voice.
“No one would care if I die, I realized this tonight,” Gerard replied reluctantly.
“How many weeks have we been apart?” Frank asked trying to ignore Gerard’s answer.
“6 weeks, 1 day and 3 hours…I counted,” Gerard replied looking away.
Frank put his free hand on Gerard’s cheek making him look at him.
“6 weeks too long,” he whispered bringing his lips to Gerards.
At first Gerard was unresponsive, thinking this was just some cruel joke, but then he started to kiss Frank back. They both smiled into the kiss as Gerard pulled Frank from his sitting position to lie beside him in his arms.
“I’m sorry for leaving,” Frank murmured into Gerard’s neck.
“I’m sorry for being an alcoholic, Frankie,” Gerard replied kissing Frank’s nose.

Gerard and Frank lay there in each others arms; the thoughts of Gerards attempt at suicide leaving them. They were content being in each others arms. The loneliness, sadness and pain that they had felt in the past 6 weeks had evaporated as they held each other as close as possible. Their breathing slowed into a rhythmic pattern as they drifted off into dreamless sleep.

When Gerard woke up and Frank’s side of the bed was cold all his hopes of happiness went away. It was all only just a dream! He sighed as he got out of bed – why did he have to think such things when they only made the pain worse? He walked sleepily towards the bathroom and was about to open the door when something caught his attention. There was a different smell in the air, one that made Gerard’s stomach growl with hunger. He sniffed the air again just to make sure. He ran down the hallway and almost fell down the stairs in his rush to the kitchen. He smiled at what he found when he stumbled into the kitchen.

Frank was in his Pokémon pyjamas and was humming a catchy tune as he cooked pancakes. Gerard couldn’t believe his eyes…it wasn’t a dream after all! He couldn’t contain his happiness so he put his arms around Frank’s middle and started nuzzling into Frank’s soft brown hair making Frank giggle.
“Good morning to you Gee,” he sang before bursting into another fit of giggles.
Gerard couldn’t help but grin; Frank was back in his life and he was as cute and giggly as ever! Frank turned around and placed his hands on either side of Gerard’s face. He gently kissed Gerard’s lips before pulling out. Gerard gave Frank a confused look.
“Can’t forget about the pancakes!” he exclaimed making Gerard grin even more.

Frank set the plate of delicious pancakes on the table and sat down. He took a big one and saturated it in maple syrup. Gerard watched his boyfriend devour the pancake…he couldn’t quite understand how Frank managed to get so much maple syrup on his face. Gerard took a bit longer to eat his pancakes, so Frank, being slightly impatient, decided that he would help Gerard by stealing most of his pancake. When the plate of pancakes was empty except for a few stray crumbs, both of the lovers understood that this meant that it was time to talk. They had to talk about previous events…things that Gerard would rather forget.

Frank’s cheeky grin faltered and Gerard found it hard to sustain a straight face when Frank’s was still covered in maple syrup.
“We need to talk,” Frank said breaking the silence with what was on both of their minds.
Gerard nodded as Frank wiped his face. They both left the table and entered their lounge room. The curtains were shut tightly, not letting any light in. Frank pulled on a string, opening the curtains causing light pour into the room. They both blinked as their eyes adjusted to the sudden brightness. All was silent; neither of them knew where to begin. The drinking? The attempted suicide? The depression? How much they needed each other?...were they going to last? They sat down on their soft couches, trying to buy as much time as they could so that they could get their thoughts together. The beating of their hearts rose as Frank went to break the silence. He opened his mouth to speak, only to close it again.
“Gee…” Frank started but stopped when he rethought what he was going to say.
Gerard kept silent; he didn’t deserve the rite to speak. He’d treated Frank badly; neglected him of the love and care that he so very needed. He was worthless and his thoughts meant nothing. Frank was everything…the air he breathes, the warmth he feels and the very blood that pumps through his veins. He turned away from Frank; he didn’t even deserve to look at him. Frank was too good, too angelic to be submitted to Gerard’s evil ways…if only Frank had been warned before.

“Gerard….Gerard look at me!” Frank ordered firmly, a slight tinge of anger portrayed in his voice.
Gerard complied; he had to obey Frank’s every wish. Frank looked at him with loving eyes…that love which Gerard wasn’t worthy of.
“Gerard, it hurts to see you look away from me…it makes me feel like I’m not good enough for you,” he told the silent Gerard.
Gerard stared his lover straight into the eyes.
“Don’t say that! You will always be good enough for me…it’s me that isn’t good enough for you!” he told him, his anger flaring through the air with his frustration.
“Why are you always like this? So down on you’re self…it’s like you don’t want to be happy!” Frank muttered towards his angry lover.
“I don’t need happiness! I just need…” Gerard cut off, slightly embarrassed at what he was about to say.
“You just need what?” Frank asked curiously.
“I just need…you,” Gerard whispered as his face turned a crimson colour.
Frank couldn’t believe it. One second Gerard was so angry that he looked like he was about to kill someone, the next he was stating his undying love for Frank…a love that would be there for eternity.

They stared at each other for a while, the air surrounding them that was before filled with nervousness and silence was now filled with the love and compassion that the two males had for each other. The gap between them grew shorter as they stood from their seating positions and embraced each other. They kissed each other like there was no tomorrow. This kiss wasn’t like the sweet ones that they’d shared last night and this morning. This was a passionate one that was realising the six weeks of love, pain, longing and devotion that they had for each other. It proved that they were supposed to be together and that their love could withstand the many hurdles that they faced.

As they broke apart with big grins on their faces from the release of such intense feelings, the two men couldn’t help but feel like nothing bad could happen to them as long as they were in each others arms.
“Geebear…will it start again?” Frank asked, fear heavy in his voice.
“Will what start again?” Gerard asked confused.
“The drinking…and drugs,” Frank whispered.
Gerard gazed at the wonderful and beautiful man in front of him; his hazel eyes filled with love and adoration.
“No Frankie, because you’re way better than any drug,” He told Frank, kissing him gently.
All was silent as stood in each others arms, Frank with his head on Gerard’s chest listening to its even beat. He thought to himself, every beat of Gerard’s heart was filled with pure love. He didn’t want to break the peaceful and love filled silence, but there was a question that was set in his mind.
“Gee, do you reckon we’ll last?” He asked looking up at the older man.
“We’ll be together forever…or die trying,” Gerard stated, his words filled with promise and passion.
“Gerard...” Frank warned; Gerard’s attempted suicide was still fresh in his mind.
“We’ll be together for eternity…until the end of time…until the end of everything,” Gerard promised as he gazed lovingly down at Frank.

Six Long Weeks was what it took to make these young lovers realize that they needed each other to live and that their love was supposed to last forever. They weren’t two men anymore…they were one. The six long weeks would’ve been the worst of weeks of their lives, but in the end it proved to be the best thing that ever happened to them.