Everything I Do Is Empty Without You

Sitting comfortably in the reclining chair in the living room, I slowly rocked my stepson to sleep as I watched old reruns of friends on TBS. With my fingers dancing around on his bare back, I listened to his steady breathing, wondering if I stopped rubbing his back now if he’d wake up and complain to me again. Loudly, the front door opened causing me to glance over my shoulder to see who was entering the house that belonged to Joel.

With a frown gracing my Wife’s face, Kodie let the door slam shut, luckily JJ is a deep sleeper and didn’t wake from the noise, “Babe, your son is asleep.” I informed her in a whisper.

Kodie’s eyes darted towards me with annoyance before they softened upon seeing JJ, “Is he still warm?” She wondered.

“Yeah,” I answered. Not only did the poor little guy split his head open the other day, this morning around four thirty he woke up and barely made it to the bathroom before vomiting until his little body couldn’t take it anymore, he’s been burning up ever since.

“Did you give him anymore Tylenol?” She went on, questioning me.

“I just did about twenty minutes ago, it’s starting to work.” I informed her.

Inhaling deeply, Kodie threw her bag onto the couch before tossing her keys onto the coffee table, “Fuck, California.” She snapped harshly, “I fucking hate it here, Barakat.” She growled at me before walking away towards the kitchen, “God Damnit!” She screamed from the kitchen.

Raising my eyebrow, I didn’t know whether or not to get up and follow her in there or to stay put with JJ. The last thing we all need right now is him to wake up and be fussy. Storming back into living room, Kodie came to a stop in front of me with a children’s ear thermometer. Carefully, she took the pre-schoolers’ temp, shaking her head at the results, she carefully scooped the boy up out of my arms, “JJ, baby wake up.” She said.

JJ opened his tired eyes with a soft whine. He looked at his Mother with a confused expression before turning back around to me and reaching for me, not that he wanted me over his Mother because he probably doesn’t, he just wants to get away from her while she’s trying to wake him up.

“No, c’mon baby …” She sighed as she adjusted him, “Look at me, does your stomach still hurt?”

JJ turned his attention back to his Mother and nodded, “Yeah, I’m stummy hurts.”

“Ok,” She sat him back down on my lap then walked over to the door, grabbing his shoes, “I’m taking him to the doctor’s.” She informed me, “In the meantime can you get the empty boxes out of the garage and start packing up my room?”

“Kodie?” I wondered, “What happened today?”

“Nothing, I’m just sick of this fucking place, I hate my fucking job … the pay may be amazing but I’m not happy there, everyone treats me like shit and like I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing. I may be just nineteen but I’m a fucking damn good nurse.” She growled as she finished putting JJ’s shoes on then looked around the living room, “Justin Jon, where did you put your jacket?” She wondered.

JJ shrugged as he turned around and wrapped his arms around my neck all while relaxing once more, “Rub my back,” He ordered with a raspy voice.

Listening to him, I started to rub his back again as I watched my Wife look around for JJ’s jacket, “Kodie…” I started.

“No, Jack.” She pointed to me, “Don’t talk me out of this!”

“I wasn’t,” I mumbled, “I was going to say that maybe he has strep.” I shrugged, “It seems like it hurts him to talk, like he’s straining.”

Kodie’s beautiful green eyes studied her son before she walked away down the hall, “Rian did this, Rian got him sick.”

I laughed softly, “He’s a kid, Kodie, he’s going to get sick … Rian just took him out to have fun, it’s not Rian’s fault.”

“First he breaks him, then he makes him ill.” She sighed as she came back into the living room with a shirt and his jacket, “JJ, get up … put your shirt on please, babe.”

JJ sat up once again and lifted his arms so his Mother could dress him. Once his shirt and jacket were both on, Kodie scooped him up before grabbing her bag and keys, “You can just throw my clothes into my suitcases that are in the closet, and JJ’s clothes go in the blue rubbermate bin out in the garage.” She adjusted him on her hip, “I’ll bring home something for dinner.” With that she left the house without a proper goodbye.

Frowning deeply, I wasn’t quite sure what just happened but I have a feeling that my emotional Wife just gave up on everything and everyone in California. Standing to my feet, I started towards the garage for the empty boxes when I heard Joel’s voice, “Jack!?” He called out from the living room, “What did you do to my sister!?” He snapped, “She’s speeding through the neighborhood like a bat out of hell with her son in the back.”

“Why do you always think I’m the root of her anger?” I wondered, “He’s sick and she’s pissed, they’re on their way to his Doctor’s office.”

Walking in from the living room, he eyed me, “How come you’re not with her, helping her?”

“She ordered me to pack up her shit.” I shrugged, “Apparently today wasn’t a good day and she’s moving home.” I eyed the oldest Cryer sibling before frowning deeply, “What’s it to you anyway, you’re selling the house.” I pointed out simply before exiting the house into the garage.

Just as the garage door shut, it opened up again and Joel stood there, “Who told you?” He frowned.

Glancing over at him, I rolled my eyes, “You, you left the papers all over the kitchen table this morning.” I informed him as I picked up the blue rubbermate bin. Opening the lid, I saw that it was empty inside leading me to believe that this was the bin Kodie was referring to, “I put them in your room, not wanting Kodie to accidently find them.” I set the bin to the side as I went through the boxes, making sure they were empty before I took them into the house.

“It’s not that I was just going to kick Kodie out,” He assured me, “I found a nice townhouse for her and I was going to buy it for her.” He insisted, “But my trip home with Heath to visit my parents went better than I had expected, we’re moving to Baltimore.”

“City or county?” I wondered.

“City.” He answered.

“So, you were just going to leave Kodie out here with Trent?” I frowned, “Whom I know loves her unconditionally but he’s the biggest flake on the face of this planet.” I shot a glare over towards him, “You know just as well as I do that Kodie shouldn’t be alone, she doesn’t like to be alone, and who was going to take care of JJ? Kodie doesn’t want him in daycare, Rian doesn’t either. Trent sure as hell wasn’t going to do it …”

Joel clenched his jaw before pointing his finger at me, “Don’t get that fucking tone with me, Barakat, I’m not the jackass who left her alone for four years, I’m not the asshole who broke her heart, you’re the one who pushed her out of your fucking life!” He said, screaming at me by the time he ended his sentence.

“You don’t know a damn thing, Cryer.” I shook my head, “I wasn’t the one who pushed her out of my life, she left my life!” I snapped.

Without a warning, Joel came after me, attacking me with nothing but anger in his eyes. Not wanting to fight back but needing to, I swung my balled up fists towards the much stronger guy. I’m not sure how much time passed as we stumbled around in the garage, fighting and yelling profound words at each other before Joel managed to pin me down against the cold concrete floor, taking hit after hit on my face as I laid there, pretty much defenseless against him.

Then, suddenly he was lifted up off of me while another guys voice yelled, I wasn’t sure who it was but I silently thanked him as I rolled over onto my side, spitting out blood. After a few seconds of relief though, I felt Joel kick me in gut as hard as he could and all I could do was moan in pain while thinking that I was knocking on death’s door.

--------------------

Walking through the front door of the house that I’ll be leaving by this weekend, I let out a sigh as I shut the door then laid my son on the couch, “You lay here, buddy.” I whispered to JJ who, like Jack said, has developed strep throat, “Try to get some sleep.” I demanded as I kissed his forehead then walked away towards the kitchen with the bag of take-out food and JJ’s medicine that needs to be kept in the fridge.

Setting the food down on the counter, I went to the fridge and opened it up, placing the medicine on a door shelf, “Babe?” I called out, “Jack?” I went on but got no response. Frowning deeply, I looked around the quiet kitchen feeling like something was terribly wrong, it was then I saw the bloody kitchen towel in the sink, “Jack!?” I snapped louder as I turned around to hurry down the hall but I came face to face with Joel, “Who’s blood is that?” I wondered.

“Jack’s.” He answered bluntly as his blue eyes studied me.

“What happened? Is he ok?” I widened my eyes waiting for a response, “Where is he?”

“The hospital,” He muttered but he didn’t seem too worried or that he even cared for that matter.

Falling silent, I stared at my brother just like he was staring at me. After a long moment, I lifted my hand with no self control then slapped him across his face as hard as I could, knowing he had something to do with that blood in the sink. With a clenched jaw, he just closed his eyes tightly for a second before opening them up, “Someone had to put him in his place, Kodie.” Joel said coldly with no regret in his eyes.

“Fuck you, Joel.” I growled lowly, “You think me not talking to Jack for four years is bad?” I wondered, “Wait till you see me push you completely out of my life. You will have nothing to do with me, my son or my husband. As far as I’m concerned, you’re not family to me anymore.” I walked away without another word.

“Kodie,” Joel started.

“No!” I yelled as I turned around on my heel to look at him, “I will not tolerate violence in my life, I’ve already had to deal with that shit enough!” I screamed then I pointed towards my son in the living room, “You fucking lucky my son wasn’t around when this happened.” I then pointed my finger at Joel, “Don’t you dare try to apologize or even try to talk to me. Jack has been nothing but understanding with you, nothing but polite and you treat him like this?” I widened my eyes, “And why did he deserve something like this? Because he said something immature or rude … for fuck’s sake Joel, this is Jack Barakat we’re dealing with, he’s always been and always will be like that!”

Once that was said, I walked away into the living room to see JJ fast asleep on the couch and I thanked the heaven’s above that my yelling didn’t wake the little boy. Walking back into the kitchen I glared at Joel, “Who took him to the hospital?”

“Trent.” He answered as he sat down at the table.

“You should be fucking ashamed of yourself.” I growled then entered the living room once again. Not wanting to do this but not wanting to leave my son with Joel, I carefully picked the little boy up and left the house. After buckling JJ into his booster seat, I got behind the wheel and drove as fast as I could to the hospital.

Once there, I walked in through the emergency room. Taking a quick glance around, I saw Trent sitting in a corner seat by himself, flipped through a magazine. Hurrying over to him, I let out a stressful sigh, “Where’s Jack?” I wondered.

Trent looked up at me, “In the back,” He answered as he shifted his eyes to JJ, “Oh God, Kodie … why did you bring him?”

“Because I wasn’t about to leave him with Joel.” I handed JJ over to Trent, “Hold him, I’m going to see if they’ll let me back there.”

“Fair warning, he looks bad.” Trent assured me, “It’s mainly swelling, it looks worse than it really is but he’s pretty doped up for the pain.”

“What happened?”

“I don’t know, I came over like I planned on all day, when I get there Joel has Jack pinned to the floor in the garage, just going at him. Jack fought back as much as he could but Joel is stronger.” He shrugged before kissing JJ’s temple.

I rolled my eyes before walking away towards the check in window. The lady behind the glass looked up at me then sighed, “Can I help you?” She wondered.

“Yeah, my husband came in and I was wondering if I could go back there and see him?”

“What’s his name?”

“Jack Barakat.” I answered.

She looked at some papers then nodded as she pointed to the door, “Pull it open when it buzzes.” After that, there was a loud buzz and I tugged the door open. I walked through it then she looked over the counter at me, “Room 6.” She informed me.

“Thank you.” I said with a polite smile.

Maneuvering my way through the long hospital hall, I searched for the room, finally I came into a rather large room with smaller ‘rooms’ sectioned off but curtains and numbers on the walls above the ‘rooms’. Finding room six, I tugged the curtain back just a little and peeked in to see Jack laying back on a bed, fully dressed with his shoes on, “Oh God,” I whispered at the sight of his mangled face.

Lifting his head, he opened his eyes just a bit and sighed before laying his head back, “Kodie,” He whispered, “I’m fine, really.”

“Bullshit,” I said as I entered all the way and stood by the side of his bed, “Jack,” I whispered as I gently touched his cheek, making his wince and reach up to my hand, grabbing it loosely, pushing it away, “It hurts,” He mumbled before carefully kissing the back of my hand with is swollen and cut lips.

“How long have you been here?”

“About two hours, I was passed out when I got here, I woke up in this bed.” He cleared his throat, “I’m just waiting for my discharge papers, which is taking for fucking ever.” He rolled his eyes a little bit, “How’s JJ?”

“You look like you’re about to die and you’re worried about JJ?” I whispered with a smile.

He nodded, “It looks worse than it is,” He assured me, “So, how is he?”

“He has strep and just wants to curl up with someone who’ll rub his back while he sleeps.” I smiled, “The doctor gave me some cherry flavored medicine for him. He wouldn’t take the first dose at the doctor’s office so I bribed him with a jamba juice.” I smirked.

Jack laughed lightly but said nothing.

“What happened, babe?” I asked as I sat down on his bed next to him.

“Um, Joel and I were talking, he was making a big deal out of me helping you pack up then I told him I found the paper’s he signed to put the house up on the market…” He paused for a second, “We then continued to have what I thought was a small disagreement and the next thing I knew he was coming after me.” He shrugged.

“Were you at fault too?” I wondered, “Did you pressure him into hitting you?”

“No,” Jack shifted his weight before letting out a sigh, “Why would I willingly want to fight him?” He frowned a little, “I didn’t know it was going to get out of hand … he was basically calling me out on something that I didn’t do and I told him what really happened the next thing, he was swinging at me.”

I lowered my head and frowned deeply when I saw that his clothes had blood all over them, “I lost my temper with him, Babe.” I whispered, “But if he did this, what’s stopping him for doing it again?” I wondered, “If he has that much bottled up anger that he has to go after you for something so petty, what if he loses his temper with JJ?” I shrugged, “Or me … I don’t like violence, Jack, there’s other ways to settle things besides getting violent and hitting each other. I did, however, slap him before telling him he’s dead to me.”

Jack sat up and wrapped his arms around me, “He would never hurt JJ or you that I know for sure.”

I hugged back and nodded, “Yeah, but I don’t know for sure.” I shrugged, “I have trust issues, what can I say?” I asked before pulling away and studying his face, “How bad?”

“Broken nose, two black eyes, he dislocated my jaw.”

“Then how are you talking?”

“It wasn’t that bad, plus I can’t really feel much of anything right now.” He informed me, “They gave me some great drugs, my whole face is numb,” He gave me a soft smile.

“Boys,” I whispered before rolling my eyes.

He laid himself back and closed his eyes, “They also made sure I didn’t have any internal bleeding.” He whispered before pulling up his shirt just enough to show me his bruised stomach.

Gasping at the sight of his black and blue skin, I shook my head but said nothing.

“So, no baby makin’ tonight,” He teased, trying to lighten the mood.

I let a smile pull on my lips, “I love you, Jack.”

Opening his eyes, he looked down at me, “I love you, too.”

I nodded before taking his hand in mine and falling quiet, not really wanting to talk anymore. This definitely hasn’t been the best of days for sure, hopefully things will look up tomorrow.