High School Is the Least of Our Worries.

Mikey.

I turn the key in the lock of my house, sighing as I notice all the lights are off. Gerard must not be home yet; he must still be with Frank.. I grit my teeth as I think of his... ugh, I don’t even know what Frank is to him. Boyfriend? I doubt it. He probably is just fucking with Gerard, his dirty little secret while he plays the superstar jock in the public eye. I feel a wash of anger rush through me. How dare he treat my big brother this way?

I stop dead in my tracks as I see the shards of glass buried in the carpet. I look up and see the window broken, smashed to pieces from the outside. As I look outside, I notice Gerard’s car, badly beaten up and hidden around the other side of the house. I must have missed it earlier.

My eyes widen in terror as I take a better look at the carpet. Small splatters of blood are sunken into the coarse material and lead out of the room. My blood runs cold.

“Gerard?” I whisper, my voice shaking. I return to the stairs and walk up them slowly, my mind running through all the (worst) possibilities. Did we have a break in? Did something happen to Gerard? My heart pounds steadily.

“Gerard?” I ask again, slightly louder, as I open the door to his room. The first thing I see is Gerard lying on the ground, blood pouring out of his chest. I swear my heart stops beating. No...

“Gerard!” I breathe, rushing to his side and stroking his face. “Gerard, Gerard, please! You’re not dead, you can’t be!” I whisper, tears rolling down my face. “Gee, please, wake up...” I plead desperately, my voice barely higher than a mumble.

Suddenly, I hear the cock of a gun and I freeze. Slowly, frightened, I turn my head to the source of the noise and my eyes instantly narrow. The tall, intimidating body of Frank Iero is turned away from me, his eyes out of the window. He holds a gun in his hands, stroking it with absent-minded hands. I see tears staining his face.

“You!” I say in barely a whisper. “You... you killed him.” When he doesn’t answer I get up from Gerard, hysteria building within me. He killed my Gerard. “You fucking killed him!” I yell, tears running down my face without any sign of stopping. My body shakes with disbelief and grief and anger and pain and... my body is so full of so many incomprehensible emotions.

He doesn’t answer and I let out a strangled scream and launch myself at him, hitting him over and over again, my fists ramming into his shoulders, back and chest.

“You killed him! You murderer! He’s fucking dead!” I scream, enraged that my punches barely make him flinch. His eyes don’t even flicker to me and after a few more fruitless attempts to hurt him I crumple, bursting into furious and hopeless tears. “He’s gone... he’s gone...” I say in a squeaky whisper. I flinch away furiously as he tries to place a hand on my shoulder.

“G-get away f-from me. You k-killed him... y-you killed him!” I sob.

“I didn’t kill him, Mikey,” Frank says quietly, and I look up at him with wild eyes.

“Drop the g-gun, Frank,” I say threateningly, cursing myself when I realise my voice is quivering. He looks at me and then looks back at the gun as if he’s never seen it before, releasing his grip from it. It hits the ground with a metallic thud and I cringe away from it... the weapon that killed my brother.

“I didn’t kill him,” he whispers, crouching down and I scowl at him through my tears. “I would never, ever kill Gerard. Please, believe that.”

I try to hold back a sob but I can’t. Gerard... I lean forward and lock eyes with him, my hatred for him burning within me.

“Prove it.”

Frank.

“H-how can I prove it?” I whisper in a shaky voice, trying not to look at Mikey’s face, so cold and full of hatred for me. I guess I can’t really blame him.

Mikey shakes his head, not answering as he leans down and presses his hand to Gerard’s pale lifeless face.

“W-what’s he done to you Gee?” Mikey whispers, holding back tears.

“Mikey… I haven’t…” I start but realise he’s not listening, he’s pressing kisses all over Gerard’s face, small shaky gasps emitting from his lips.

“I-I’m sorry Mikey…” I whisper as I leave the room, taking one last glance at Gerard’s face. I let a short sob fall from my lips as I shut the door, blocking out the sounds of Mikey’s whimpers of ‘wake up’ and ‘come back’.

I walk through the house as if in a dream, nothing makes sense anymore and probably never will again. Not without him.

I pause outside Gerard’s room, debating with myself weather to go in or not. I take a breath and place my hand on the handle pressing down and letting myself into his room. Mikey would probably bury me alive if he found me in here.

I close the door quietly and glance around the room. It’s almost exactly the same as it was when I was last here…God that seems like a life time ago now. The only difference is that Gerard’s not here with me, and more bottles and cans have accumulated in the corners.

I walk to his bed, brushing my fingers over the many drawings. I brush away stray tears and sit down, freezing as I see something on his pillow… a letter.

I whimper quietly as I realise it’s written on the back of his only drawing of me. I pick it up gently and unfold it, the writing on the page is shaky and uneven. He must have been so scared.

When I finish reading it, the paper has tear stains on it, the ink running down the page. I fold it up again and put it in my pocket, laying my head down on his pillow and breathing in as the tears start to fall.

I have to prove to Mikey how much he meant to me… how much Iloved love him.

I turn over and something catches my eye, a picture of Gerard and Mikey, probably taken a few years ago, they’re standing next to a man, their dad. They’re all smiling. I run my finger over Gerard’s face slowly, his smiling face looking back into mine.

“I love you,” I whisper.