Status: trying to make weekly uploads
It's Not the End of the World
Day Seven
The black asphalt streets are now stained red. The park with the squeaky swings is in pieces. Actually one of the cord things that attaches the swing to the wooden frame had been used as a whip. The pieces of mulch that used to cushion our falls, are now cradling pieces of humans. Lucy couldn’t take looking at the wreckage; she turned back after one glimpse down the street. It is taking all of my will power to keep writing because the scene was so disturbing, I feel someone must record it. We tried to see if we could someone we knew but the bodies that littered the streets and parks were so mangled they were unidentifiable. We thought there might be some people left that hid in time, and that weren’t affected by the high pitch noise like us; if there are they’re better hidden than us. After the scene at the park Anna turned back, she couldn’t stomach the smell of week old bodies; a smell that only intensified in the afternoon when the temperatures got into the upper 90’s. Carrie and I went to the local mall, not much but it was a nice place to hang out after school. I never thought about the damage human beings can do to each other. What about humanity? I thought we were supposed to be inherently kind and decent. I don’t think I will ever look at another person or even myself the same way after today. The entrance to mall used to be nice, with gray tiled floors and a big water fountain in the center where everyone tossed some coins. Now the gray tile is black, the fountain is broken and overflowing, flooding most of the stores, and the chairs we used to sit in to sip lemonade while having a heartfelt conversation with our very best friends are being used as skewers, the legs are. The actual seat part of the chair was covered in what I could only think of as bits of skin, hair, and some grayish, sponge like organ. It is a very disgusting sight.
When we came back to the school Carrie and I went straight to the girls locker room, running past everyone with their questions, so that we could try to wash this horrific day off of us. It wasn’t logical; you can’t un-see something simply by washing off, no matter how hard you scrub. Oh we tried though, I know I must’ve rubbed off at least two layers of skin because I was red as could be when I got out of the shower; which, I only did because Anna mentioned something about having so much water, and not to waste it needlessly. Afterwards the guys, Lucy, and Anna wanted us to tell them what we saw. We tried as best we could to describe it to them, starting with the streets being stained red. Once we got to the part about the park, Carrie and I had to stop it was just so sickening thinking about what we saw. Not only what we saw, but the thought that people did those things to each, I mean you’d expect that from animals not humans. The destructive power each of us processes is intense and terrifying.
I can’t stop thinking about what we saw; it was like a car crash. You don’t want to look, but you do anyway because somewhere deep down inside you want to make sense of what happened even though you know you can’t. I don’t know why this is happening; all I know is that it is. This is the world we live in now, whether we like it or not. I wasn’t even able to take any pictures; I couldn’t bring myself to document something so terrible.
I know eventually I will. Eventually we’ll all get used to this world, this way of life. But for now, I’m going to try to hold onto my humanity as tightly as I can; I don’t want to lose myself, my values, simply because the setting has changed. Which is why I kept working on the greenhouse last night, hours after Lucy called it a day. I do NOT want to have to take a life to survive, after what I saw I just can’t justify it anymore. I won’t judge the others if it comes down to it and they have to defend themselves, I can’t even judge those who took the lives in town. I don’t know what drove them to it, what switch was flipped that made them think it was ok to take a person’s life. I just know that to me, my life is not any better or worth more than other person’s life. I will protect myself and my friends, but I refuse to kill someone. I will not risk my humanity, not even for my own survival.
I know I sound intense or extreme, but I feel this situation calls for intensity and extreme reactions. This situation is pretty extreme and you have to meet one force with a greater force to get it to change. Or something along those lines, physics never really was my cup of tea. Any way Lucy and I never completed the greenhouse. I came close to it last night, or at least I think I did. It looks like a house now, and doesn’t fall over when you bump it so I’d call that an improvement. Speaking of which I need to go and work on that right now, I’ll be sure to blog tomorrow.
When we came back to the school Carrie and I went straight to the girls locker room, running past everyone with their questions, so that we could try to wash this horrific day off of us. It wasn’t logical; you can’t un-see something simply by washing off, no matter how hard you scrub. Oh we tried though, I know I must’ve rubbed off at least two layers of skin because I was red as could be when I got out of the shower; which, I only did because Anna mentioned something about having so much water, and not to waste it needlessly. Afterwards the guys, Lucy, and Anna wanted us to tell them what we saw. We tried as best we could to describe it to them, starting with the streets being stained red. Once we got to the part about the park, Carrie and I had to stop it was just so sickening thinking about what we saw. Not only what we saw, but the thought that people did those things to each, I mean you’d expect that from animals not humans. The destructive power each of us processes is intense and terrifying.
I can’t stop thinking about what we saw; it was like a car crash. You don’t want to look, but you do anyway because somewhere deep down inside you want to make sense of what happened even though you know you can’t. I don’t know why this is happening; all I know is that it is. This is the world we live in now, whether we like it or not. I wasn’t even able to take any pictures; I couldn’t bring myself to document something so terrible.
I know eventually I will. Eventually we’ll all get used to this world, this way of life. But for now, I’m going to try to hold onto my humanity as tightly as I can; I don’t want to lose myself, my values, simply because the setting has changed. Which is why I kept working on the greenhouse last night, hours after Lucy called it a day. I do NOT want to have to take a life to survive, after what I saw I just can’t justify it anymore. I won’t judge the others if it comes down to it and they have to defend themselves, I can’t even judge those who took the lives in town. I don’t know what drove them to it, what switch was flipped that made them think it was ok to take a person’s life. I just know that to me, my life is not any better or worth more than other person’s life. I will protect myself and my friends, but I refuse to kill someone. I will not risk my humanity, not even for my own survival.
I know I sound intense or extreme, but I feel this situation calls for intensity and extreme reactions. This situation is pretty extreme and you have to meet one force with a greater force to get it to change. Or something along those lines, physics never really was my cup of tea. Any way Lucy and I never completed the greenhouse. I came close to it last night, or at least I think I did. It looks like a house now, and doesn’t fall over when you bump it so I’d call that an improvement. Speaking of which I need to go and work on that right now, I’ll be sure to blog tomorrow.