Blooming

“I can’t believe it’s been two months already.” Lucy said. I couldn’t believe it either. I thought back to how awful I thought it would be having a baby and the way it was now. Now, it seemed, my life was almost perfect. I had the perfect boyfriend who wanted to be with me all the time even though I was pregnant, my best friend who’d been by my side since the day I found out and who was was happier than ever with her own boyfriend, and Christmas was coming. Maybe I was looking a little too into things, but I didn’t care. This was my perfect life, and I was going to live it to the fullest while I could.
` “I know.” I stated with a smile. Riley squeezed my hand and smiled as well. It was a couple weeks before Christmas and Lucy, Craig, Riley, and I were all sitting around in my living room.
“What are you going to do when you start to really show?” Craig asked and the truth was, I didn’t know. If I wore tight clothing, I was too paranoid that everybody would notice. Lucy, Craig, and Riley had all assured me that it looked fine, but I always opted for a baggy sweatshirt instead. I wasn’t ready for the world to know.
“I don’t know. I’ll just have to hide it for as long as I can, I guess.” I knew I hadn’t really answered his question. Craig had a way of always asking the questions nobody else was brave enough to. He always wanted to know my personal feelings about everything, fascinated by my pregnancy.
“Have you talked to Darren since you told him?”
Here we go again, I thought.
Lucy elbowed Craig in the ribs as she saw Riley’s face fall. Darren wasn’t a subject we discussed often, especially in front of Riley.
“Uh, no.” I said gripping Riley’s hand tighter. He looked at me with pleading eyes but managed to smile. Then, he changed the subject.
For hours, the three of us talked about anything that came up. We ventured into high school and how different this year would be, discussed our goals and plans, and vowed to never grow apart. This was a promise that pulled at my heart in way I didn’t understand but I knew I would try my hardest to keep it.
As we sat around the fireplace, reminiscing and in awe of our Christmas tree, I couldn’t help but think of how everything seemed to be falling into place. I had wonderful friends and a loving family. I had all these people to help me defeat this battle. In fact, it almost didn’t even seem that bad anymore. All I cared about was keeping things the way they were. I was even beginning to feel excited about the baby.
I didn’t want to jinx my luck, but it was a place in my mind that I liked to visit. It was comforting to know that I wouldn’t have to do this alone.
“Well, we’d better go.” Craig said after glancing at the clock; nine thirty, it read.
We all got up and Riley and I walked Lucy and Craig to the door.
“Call me later,” Lucy urged giving me a squeeze. I promptly agreed as they walked out the door. Riley and I watched out the window as they drove away, then turned to each other.
“So....” Riley said with a smile. His cheeks were red and his teeth were almost shimmering in the glow of the tree’s lights. His hair was long, reaching pass his eyebrows just enough so you could see his bright blue eyes. For days, I’d tried to count each color of blue I saw in them but I never succeeded in counting them all.
“So....” I repeated. My parents were at a Christmas party so it was just the two of us. If I had been with anybody else, there might have been pressure, even considering the state I was in, but with Riley, it felt right. We never talked about doing anything we didn’t want to do. Instead, we talked about other things, the baby, school, anything. I’d never felt more connected to somebody before as I did with Riley. And maybe it wasn’t what average teenage couples wanted to do, but then again, we would never be considered a normal teenage couple.
“Want to pop in DVD?” I asked casually. He smiled.
“Sure.”
We put in a comedy, that I could never remember the name of. Riley had been begging me to watch it with him for weeks but as we sat together on my couch, the fire crackling in the background, his attention wasn’t on the movie.
“I really like you, Savannah.” he said. This time, his eyes were big and his face was serious. The way he looked down at me was intoxicating. The glow from the fire made his face appear angelic, not a flaw upon his brilliant face.
“Even though I’m sixteen, pregnant, and the baby’s not even yours?”
He smiled softly at my joke.
“Even though you’re sixteen and pregnant.” he said, leaving out the last part.
“I really like you too.” I said, trying to wrap my mind around how amazing things were.
“I’m glad,” he whispered so softly I almost couldn’t hear him. He leaned his face in closer to mine, so close I could feel his breath of my cheeks, and placed his lips on mine. He didn’t pull away as soon as he usually did but when he finally did, his face was serious again and he paused before speaking.
“I love you, Savannah.” he whispered, looking me straight in the eyes.
My heart stopped. I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. What had he just said? Love? What did I know about love?
I thought about this for what seemed like hours although I knew only a couple minutes had passed by. Nonetheless, it was still a long time to have somebody wait for you figure out if you loved them or not. Just moments ago, my mind was a safe place to be. Now, I was afraid of what might be in there.
The closest thing I’ve ever come to love was Darren. He had my heart from the day I met him but seemed to be very good at breaking it as well. He was my first love, and those feelings had never gone away. In my heart I knew they never would.
But as I sat there with Riley, simply holding his hand, I couldn’t believe how happy I was. I realized that what I felt for Darren and what I was feeling for Riley were completely different. Riley would never break my heart, he promised me this daily. He vowed to always be there for me, to help clean up the mess Darren and I had left behind. Of course I loved Riley, but it wasn’t until now that I realized how much.
“I....” I started but was interrupted by the doorbell. At first, I thought it was my parents but wondered why they would ring the doorbell, rather then just coming in.
Riley sighed as we got up and walked to the door. I felt bad leaving him hanging, but there was plenty of time to speak my peace afterwards. Wasn’t there?
But when I opened the door, I didn’t know that I was letting in more heartache than I would’ve imagined. In that moment of time, I would hurt more than just one person and there was no way around it for there, on my doorstep, stood Darren, the father of my baby, with flowers in one hand and a little black velvet box in anther.
“Savannah,” he started getting down on one knee. I couldn’t believe this was happening.
“Get up, Darren.” I said, taking Riley’s hand in mine. He pulled away softly.
My heart was beating harder than it ever had and my knees started to go weak. I thought I was going to pass out right there.
Darren continued.
“I know I haven’t always been there for you,” he said.
“Darren, get up.” I said firmly. He ignored me and I could see out of the corner of my eye the look of sadness and awe of Riley’s face. My heart ached in an indescribable way.
“But I want to make this right,” he held the little box in his hands, reaching it out to me.
“SHUT UP, Darren.” I tried to stop him once more but failed. I could see Riley’s face fall even more than before. His shoulders were hunched and he was still staring at Darren.
“So, Savannah....”
“Darren, stop. Really, it’s fine. Don’t do this.” Tears were forming in my eyes as I tried my hardest to get things back to the way they were just seconds earlier. Just one more sentence and Darren would ruin everything.
He opened the little box to reveal a perfect diamond ring. I felt sick as I watched it shine in the light of the porch.
“Will you marry me?”
They were the last words I heard before my knees gave out.