Fragments of a Broken Mind
Chapter 5
*TIME ELAPSE*
When I woke up both the others had gone. Frank had gone to work I assumed but where Gerard had gone was a mystery. I got up and went to the bathroom to fix my hair and splash water on my face. I went to my own room and got dressed before heading down to the kitchen on the hunt for some coffee. Outside I say Ray playing with Gerard so I knew that Frank had made sure that Gerard wasn’t going to be alone. I smiled gently thinking my boyfriend was so considerate in letting me sleep and calling Ray. I boiled the kettle and poured myself a mug of coffee. The boys saw me through the window and waved and I grinned and sat at the table watching them. Gerard was running with his arms outstretched and Ray was laughing. I assumed Gerard was being an aeroplane but I could have been wrong as I couldn’t hear them. I wondered again just what it was Gerard had faced to reduce him to this.
There was a knock at the door and so I got up to answer it. I swung open the door and fell back in shock as my eyes fell on my mother, “Mum?” I stammered eventually as I stuffed my hands into my pockets so she wouldn’t see them shaking.
“Michael,” she nodded her head in response, “don’t think you are forgiven at all, my feelings remain unchanged.”
I raised a brow, “so, what brings you here?”
“Bob came to see me today and explained about Gerard and so I am here to see him.”
Inwardly I felt relief as Gerard definitely needed to see her. I was suspicious too which wasn’t a good thing. I could see her taking Gerard away from us so we would never see him. I couldn’t let it happen because he was such a big part of me and I needed him with me, whatever his mental state. So I sucked in a breath before pushing the door open, “you can see him, you are always welcome to see him but he stays here, OK?”
“Fine,” she stalked past me, her perfume hanging in the air. I stayed still for a second, the smell taking me back to my own days as a child. Mentally I slapped myself into growing up. Surely Gerard hadn’t reacted to something a simple as a smell? I pondered this question until I realised she was waiting for me, “where is he then?”
I closed the door and led her through to the kitchen and pointed to the door. Before she went out to him I put my hand on her arm, “Mum, you need to know some things. He likes to be called Gee-Gee and… that he thinks you and Dad never got divorced,” I bit my lip, “he is bound to ask so I just thought…,” my voice trailed away.
When I looked into her eye’s though I was surprised to see a soft smile, “we always called him Gee-Gee as he couldn’t say Gerard and thought Gee sounded like half a name,” her smile faded though and she swatted my hand off of her arm. “As for questions about your father… Well, I take it you have lied to him then?”
I folded my arms and scowled slightly, “we have had no choice.”
“You always have a choice Michael and as usual you have made the wrong decision,” she ignored my growl and went out the door. From inside I watched Gerard run to her arms and hug her.
Ray came in a watched me lay my head on the table as I sat down, “how can he need the one thing that hates me the most?” I whined softly. I looked outside and watched Gerard dancing round our mother and inside I cried knowing he had never been that happy to see me, “she abandoned him… us… it’s just so unfair!”
When I woke up both the others had gone. Frank had gone to work I assumed but where Gerard had gone was a mystery. I got up and went to the bathroom to fix my hair and splash water on my face. I went to my own room and got dressed before heading down to the kitchen on the hunt for some coffee. Outside I say Ray playing with Gerard so I knew that Frank had made sure that Gerard wasn’t going to be alone. I smiled gently thinking my boyfriend was so considerate in letting me sleep and calling Ray. I boiled the kettle and poured myself a mug of coffee. The boys saw me through the window and waved and I grinned and sat at the table watching them. Gerard was running with his arms outstretched and Ray was laughing. I assumed Gerard was being an aeroplane but I could have been wrong as I couldn’t hear them. I wondered again just what it was Gerard had faced to reduce him to this.
There was a knock at the door and so I got up to answer it. I swung open the door and fell back in shock as my eyes fell on my mother, “Mum?” I stammered eventually as I stuffed my hands into my pockets so she wouldn’t see them shaking.
“Michael,” she nodded her head in response, “don’t think you are forgiven at all, my feelings remain unchanged.”
I raised a brow, “so, what brings you here?”
“Bob came to see me today and explained about Gerard and so I am here to see him.”
Inwardly I felt relief as Gerard definitely needed to see her. I was suspicious too which wasn’t a good thing. I could see her taking Gerard away from us so we would never see him. I couldn’t let it happen because he was such a big part of me and I needed him with me, whatever his mental state. So I sucked in a breath before pushing the door open, “you can see him, you are always welcome to see him but he stays here, OK?”
“Fine,” she stalked past me, her perfume hanging in the air. I stayed still for a second, the smell taking me back to my own days as a child. Mentally I slapped myself into growing up. Surely Gerard hadn’t reacted to something a simple as a smell? I pondered this question until I realised she was waiting for me, “where is he then?”
I closed the door and led her through to the kitchen and pointed to the door. Before she went out to him I put my hand on her arm, “Mum, you need to know some things. He likes to be called Gee-Gee and… that he thinks you and Dad never got divorced,” I bit my lip, “he is bound to ask so I just thought…,” my voice trailed away.
When I looked into her eye’s though I was surprised to see a soft smile, “we always called him Gee-Gee as he couldn’t say Gerard and thought Gee sounded like half a name,” her smile faded though and she swatted my hand off of her arm. “As for questions about your father… Well, I take it you have lied to him then?”
I folded my arms and scowled slightly, “we have had no choice.”
“You always have a choice Michael and as usual you have made the wrong decision,” she ignored my growl and went out the door. From inside I watched Gerard run to her arms and hug her.
Ray came in a watched me lay my head on the table as I sat down, “how can he need the one thing that hates me the most?” I whined softly. I looked outside and watched Gerard dancing round our mother and inside I cried knowing he had never been that happy to see me, “she abandoned him… us… it’s just so unfair!”