Everything I've Ever Wanted

To say I hated the tool sitting in front of me right now would definitely be an understatement. There were few people I loathed more than Tony Lucia, the Gopher hockey player who was slouched in his seat in front of me. He wore his hat backwards and I could tell from where I sat that he was struggling to stay awake during the lecture. I rolled my eyes, why did he even bother coming when he knew he would get special treatment from the professor?

I sighed and continued to scrutinize the back of his head, wondering what it was that Dakota ever even saw in him. My roommate Dakota was the main reason why I hated Tony so much. Two years ago, he slept with her at a party that was held at his house and when the next morning rolled around, he threw her out of his house when he woke up, barely giving her enough time to pull her dress on. She came home that day, sobbing uncontrollably. I held her while she cried and I immediately decided that someone as heartless as him would be placed on my shit list. So that's where he was.

I shook my head, tearing my green eyes from his Gopher hat and focusing back on the teacher, sighing when I realized I still had 15 minutes left to go. I watched as the guy sitting next to Tony, whom I knew as David Fischer, one of his teammates, knocked his shoulder hard, causing Tony to spring back to life. I snorted under my breath, but immediately regreted it as Tony turned and let his green eyes linger on me. My skin crawled from the simple gesture as his lips pulled up and his bright teeth shone back at me with a smile. I ignored my body's first response, butterflies, and forced myself to glare back at him. His smile slipped off his face, replaced by a confused look before he shrugged and turned back around.

I slowly pushed out the breath I had no idea that I was holding in and once again focused on my short professor. I doodled little hearts on my notebook paper that had no notes on it, mostly because I had been too busy looking at Tony and trying to find all sorts of things wrong with him. So far, all I could say was that he needed a hair cut and he slept in class but other than that I had come up blank. Even his smile and his laugh were perfect.

I placed my hands over my face and rubbed it roughly, trying to make myself stop thinking about Tony like that. For some reason, he walked into class today and along with the usual feelings of disgust and hatred, a burning lust pushed through, temporarily blinding me for the reasons that I hated him. I sighed and started to pack my stuff up while ignoring the fact that Tony was blatantly staring at me.

I turned back around and he was waiting for me at the end of his row, hisbeautiful annoying smile, shining at me. I glanced at him once as I walked down the stairs and out of the autotorium, hoping he would get the memo and not follow me. Either he was stupid or he never took interpersonal relations, because he followed me into the crisp, fall air. I rolled my eyes as he walked next to me and I continued to ignore him.

"You're not very social," he pointed out, taking a drink from his water bottle.

I glared over at him, hoping to strike some nervousness in him, but only getting a wider smile. "Or maybe I just don't like you?" I questioned, picking up my walk.

"Why's that? It's not like you actually know me," He countered, staring into my eyes with his piercing green ones. I temporarily lost my train of thought, finding myself caught up in the sparkle of them and the way a weird calmness washed over me as he started at me.

"I'm allowed to have my reasons and there's plenty of them. Not to mention, you're a Gopher hockey player and basically a worthless piece of crap," I informed him, sending him a too sweet smile to which he grinned back at me, not discouraged at all.

"I love stereotypes. I'm glad you put me in the hockey players are assholes group," He bit back at me.

"Oh no, Tony Lucia, you put yourself there," I snapped back at him, sick of his sarcasm and continued my walk back to the East campus, over the walk bridge that stood above the Mississippi River. I sighed when I set foot on the main campus again and walked through the courtyard. My mood had lifted significantly despite the gloomy day. Mostly it was because I had put Tony in his place, but another part of me knew I was full of crap and it was because I finally got to talk to him.

"Do you know anything about hockey?" A voice asked me, causing me to jump out of my skin.

"Oh my god, you again?" I groaned, rolling my eyes at Tony.

"Yep. Me again. Answer the question." He basically ordered me.

"Yeah, I used to play hockey," I told him, brushing some imaginary hair off of my shoulder.

"Oh, so this is you being pissed because you weren't good enough to play college hockey?" He questioned and despite his teasing tone, I couldn't help but stick it to him once more.

"No, I didn't have a dad that could get me on the team," I told him smugly. I watched from the corner of my eye as Tony tensed up and then glared at me. I pursed my lips against a smile and clasped my hands in front of me so I wouldn't reach out to him and tell him I was sorry.

"Yeah, I guess that would help a lot," He responded before he turned and headed back in the direction of the bridge. I turned my head and watched him walk briskly away, something about his form making my heart sting a bit.

Way to be a bitch, Molly

I shook my head, shaking that thought from my mind and instead telling myself that he deserved it. But once again, I was lying to myself. I knew that would be a low blow to him, and I still did it.

I slowly shuffled across campus, trying to ignore the slight guilt that was nagging inside my head, but it kept pushing against my conscience, telling it to grill me about my behavior. I sighed as I got to my on-campus house, climbing the stairs and pushing my way into the house. I found my roommate Dakota, on her laptop, her legs crossed under her, sitting on the couch. She looked up at me, her hazel eyes flickering a bit as she took in my wind tossed brown hair.

"Cute." She giggled, before turning back to her computer.

"I could say the same to you scrub," I told her, collapsing on the couch and setting my feet on the coffee table. I glanced at where she sat, her blonde hair pilled on top of her head and I found myself wondering what she had that I didn't. Why Tony slept with her and why he wouldn't pick me. But I shook my head, knowing first hand that all the guys picked her because she was easy. Plus, I did not want Tony. I winced at the part of my brain that contridicted that statement.

"I'm taking a shower," I mumbled to her, moving to the bathroom and turning the water on. I stripped my clothes off, shaking a bit at the cold air that came through the floor boards of the old house. I was pretty sure this house was a good 30 years older than me. But Dakota, who's been my roomie since freshman year, had insisted that we live here because it was old and cool. Yeah, cool temperature wise.

I stepped under the water, feeling the hot liquid push against my skin, massaging out all the stress that thinking about Tony had caused. I really had no idea why all of a sudden I was feeling this way. I guess, technically it hadn't started today. It had started two months ago when class first started and he walked in with David Fischer. The way his laugh seemed to light up the room and the way he glanced at me, sending me a dazzling smile, had pulled me in for the first time. I had seen him before, but mostly in passing on the street or when I would go out running, I would see him walking with his teammates from the arena.

The water turned cold as I continued to think about Tony, trying to not let my mind drift to sexual thoughts as I stood naked in the shower. He had that confident air about him that always drew me in to guys which is why I always seemed to get burned. I liked that he was cocky and knew he was a good hockey player. And even though I "hated" him, I still agreed with him in that area. In no way did his dad help him become a Gopher. Tony earned that himself which was another reason as to why I felt like shit for saying that.

I toweled myself off in the bathroom before wrapping the cloth around me and went to my room where I threw on a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. I sighed and sat down on my bed, debating on whether or not I should go talk with Dakota or just skip it and go to bed. I really wanted to go to bed, even as I turned my head to the clock and realized it was barely 6 PM. I pushed out a breath again and decided to skip dinner and climb into the warmth of my bed. I knew I made the right choice as I slipped under the covers, my eyes fluttering shut as images of Tony flashed over my eyelids long after I slipped into a deep sleep.
***

Have you ever had one of those moments where you dream about someone and immediately feel dirty for doing it? Or how you seem them the day after and you blush because it was a sexual dream? I was definitely in one of those moments as I squirmed in my seat, Tony sitting in front of me like always with David on his right. My mouth had a sour taste in it and lust burned brighter than before as my mind kept repeating the images of him sucking my skin, like it was stuck on replay. It was even worse when I closed my eyes, seeing the way his eyes burned a deep green as our naked bodies rolled around on my sheets

I snapped my eyes open again, desperate to stop thinking about that vivid dream. It was so distinct, from how I felt to the way my skin tingled, that when I first woke up, I walked around our house looking for him. I fought against my day dreams, bringing myself back into class. I watched Tony shake his pen as the professor continued talking, about what, I had no clue. He threw the pen down, nudging David and asking him if he had an extra.

"Does it look like I carry extra pens with me?" David asked, giving Tony a serious look.

"Apparently not?" Tony questioned before scanning his surroundings, looking for another person who might be able to help him out. I silently prayed he wouldn't ask me, but as he started to turn in my seat, I figured out God was busy. I sighed inwardly, already digging in my bag for one.

"Do you-" I held the pen in my hand, extending it towards him. He looked at it, then at me before he gave me a sheepish smile and thanked me. His fingers encircled the pen, taking it from me, but not before he slightly brushed against my skin, setting my hand on fire. I snatched my hand away, curling my fingers into a fist to stop the weird sensation. Thankfully, Tony tuned around before he saw my slight spasm.

For the first time since class started, time flew by and before I knew it we were being dismissed. I packed my stuff up slowly, trying to keep myself busy as Tony climbed over the seats and stood next to me, patiently waiting for me to finish. I pursed my lips and looked up at him.

"Is this going to be a daily occurance?" I asked him, not in a bitchy tone, but a curious one.

"If you want," he shrugged, holding my pen out for me. "Thanks."

"Why don't you keep it," I suggested. "I mean, David isn't the kind of person who carries extra pens." I grinned at him as he let out a cute laugh, his eyes crinkling in the corners.

"He's too cool," Tony told me as I hoisted my backpack onto my shoulders and we walked out of the autorium together.

It was currently a Thursday and I ran through my head all of the stuff I had to do which I found out basically added up to nothing. Although I could tell Tony wanted to continue to walk next to me, I could also see him inching his way forward and picking up his pace a bit.

"Do you have somewhere you need to go?" I asked him, his one stride now matching two of mine. "Or are you just trying to run away?"

He laughed again, this time his head being thrown back and his laughter shaking his body. "I have to get to practice and then go home and pack all my stuff. We're going to Wisconsin tomorrow for our weekend series."

"Oh. And here I thought it was all about me," I teased, surprised by the open way I messed around with him and how I felt comfortable laughing with him. I tried hard to bring my guard back up, and push back against the bubbly, happy feeling that twirled around in my stomach.

"Maybe next time." He suggested to which I jokingly nodded. We had now come to the intersection where he would have to head to the arena and I would need to keep going straight. I awkwardly shifted my weight, glancing at the walk sign I had at the same time he did.

"Uh, good luck this weekend," I offered him to which he nodded.

"Can I count on you watching?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. My heart fluttered a bit but my brain quickly made it stop.

"Yeah, but not for you," I told him, sticking my tongue out.

"Whoa there goes my ego," He told me, rolling his eyes slightly.

"Yeah, I have a tendency to do that. My bad." I told him, noticing now his walk sign was flashing at him. I glanced at it then back at him but he continued to stand next to me, studying me slightly. "Can I help you?" I questioned, cocking an eyebrow at him.

"Your eyes, they, uh, they catch the light like no other. They're beautiful," He murmured to me, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear as the wind blew it in front of my face. My cheeks flushed at the compliment as Tony took a step backwards, his body no longer protecting me from the cold air.

"Sorry, that was kinda weird," Tony muttered sheepishly, shaking his head and turning his back on me.

I pursed my lips, watching him jog across the street and stuff his hands in his pockets. I ran across the street after him, for some reason wanting to leave him with a little something.

"Hey, Tony!" I called to him, standing on the sidewalk 30 feet from him. He turned towards my voice, his eyes holding a question. I jogged the last couple feet to him, standing close enough to touch him. "Kick anyone's ass who tells you that you don't belong here."

His eyes sparkled with amusement, "so I get to kick your ass?"

"No, I changed my mind. There's no where you fit in better than here." I bit my lip to suppress my grin.

"And how did that happen?" He asked, crossing his arms over his chest, his muscles bulging against the fabric of his sweatshirt. I ignored the way my breathing became shallow as I thought about what it would be like for him to hold me in his arms.

"I don't know. I guess you're growing on me, Lucia," I shoved his shoulder before turning on my heel and walking back to the stoplight.

"Trust me, honey. I could say the same thing about you," He murmured.

I whirled my head around, looking him up and down before he spun around and headed back towards Mariucci. He left me standing there, confused and with the notion that there was no doubt that I would be thinking about him until he came home. I groaned at that thought knowing how bad that would be with Dakota around. She still had a tendency to whine about him every once and awhile when she was feeling like shit.

I casually looked back at Tony once more, watching as he walked away from me. He turned and looked over his shoulder, throwing me a wink as if he knew I had been looking the whole time. I blushed back at him, ducking my head to stare at the concrete. I pushed out a deep breathe before continuing on my journey home and wondering what I did to capture the captain of the hockey team's attention.