Everything I've Ever Wanted

"I'm feeling..." Mike picked up the neon orange bowling ball, rubbing his massive hands over it and weighing it in his hands as he looked down the lane at the pins that were awaiting to fall when he rolled the ball.

"A gutter." Jordan finished for him, pounding fists with Tony who's lap I was sitting on. Jess and I shook our heads as I ran my hand through the side of Tony's hair.

"He better get a strike." Kara muttered, "and if he doesn't, I'm not paying to take all of you out to dinner."

"Obviously you wouldn't pay. Your boyfriend is rich," Jess laughed.

"No, his parents are rich," I corrected, "just like Tony's parents are rich." I grinned at Mike who was giving me the finger.

"You guys are throwing off my mojo." Mike complained.

"You never had any Hoef. Throw the ball already," Tony rolled his eyes at his teammate.

"Looch, shut up. These things take time," Mike stressed, finally getting ready to throw the ball. We all watched as he wound back, holding the ball in his hand and palming the ball down the lane. The other two boys groaned and Kara yelped as all the pins went crashing to the polished wood floor. I bit my lip and shook my head at Tony since he was up next.

"You better get one, Ton." I pointed at him, "the money you would be spending should go to me."

"Even if I don't get this babe, Jordan still has to pay." Jordan groaned as he looked at the score, too far behind to even think about making a come back in the 9th frame.

"It's alright, babe. You're still better than these two on the ice," Jess smirked as I shook my head at her.

"Whatever. This here is captain clutch. He knows how to do it."

"On and off the ice, right Molly?" Kara asked, slapping hands with Mike and giving him a peck on the lips. I flicked my tongue at her and then gave Tony a sexy smirk as he smiled right back, setting me back in the seat as he stood for his turn.

He did his little captain swagger to the rack that held the bowling balls, picking up the black one that he had chosen, not as fruity as the other two is what he told me when he picked it out. He held it up, waiting no time to throw it down, successfully getting a strike, his fifth of the night. Apparently, Tony was good at more than just cooking and hockey. He knew how to bowl and he has to constantly help me, showing me the way to actually keep the ball straight instead of curving right into the gutter. It was exciting to have Tony's arms and body wrapped around mine as he showed me the correct form for bowling.

Tony turned around, giving me a huge smile and flexing his muscles at his teammates. "You two are boys in a league of men." Tony scooped me back up, before placing me on his lap, kissing my neck softly.

"Really? Cause the only man I see here is me." Jordan boasted as he stood up. All of us giggled behind him, the youngest of the group walking to grab his neon green ball and throwing it straight into the gutter. We all snickered back at him as he walked back flipping Tony and Mike off, leaving the ladies with glares. Jess shook her head and wrapped her arms around her boyfriend's waist, giving him a consoling kiss.

"I'm so glad you suck at something," Mike joked as we walked out of the bowling alley towards Mike's car whom had driven because his car could fit six people, you know, because of his rich parents and all.

"So where are we going to go? Schrades since you're paying, you can pick." Mike told him as he turned out of the bowling alley.

"McDonald's." Jordan told him as Jess smacked him.

"Think again," she snorted. "Let's go to Blarney's."

"I second Jess!" I exclaimed as Kara agreed.

"Blarney's it is." Mike murmured, turning the car in that direction.

We arrived at the campus bar in mere minutes, Mike weaving there while tending to Kara who was desperate for some attention. He smiled at her, giving her soft kisses on the cheek at red lights or stop signs, showing us how deep his love was for her. I sat in the back with Tony, letting him place small and sweet kisses against my temple, murmuring softly how beautiful I looked in his sweatshirt. Tony and I walked into the bar hand in hand, a goofy smile adorning both of our faces as the three happy couples sauntered in. The boys dragged us right to the bar, ordering us drinks before we could even consider food.

"Tony, I just want water," I interrupted him as he tried to order me a beer. He turned to look at me, an eyebrow raised but he shrugged.

"And I guess just water for the lady." He rotated around, grabbing my hips and pulling me into his as he rested his back against the bar. He nuzzled my nose softly as I sighed contently. I lost myself in his green eyes, the specks of gold more prominent due to the sun and the way it had pulled out the color more so than normal. He was so good looking that it temporarily made my head spin when he reached down and placed his mouth on mine. The feel of his plump lips on mine would never get old and the butterflies that would sear through my body wouldn't either.

The bartender set our drinks on the bar top as the place all of a sudden got busy. College kids started to pour in, including some of the hockey players. Tony pulled out a bar stool for me to sit on as Jake Cepis came over and struck up a conversation. Although he was supposed to be listening to Jake, Tony's fingers pressed against my back in slow circles while every once and awhile he would place a cozy kiss to my cheek. His fluffy kisses were a signal that although Jake was talking to him, his attention was solely on me.

"Why aren't you drinking?" Kara asked, taking a sip of her mixed drink, some weird concoction that I had never even heard of.

"It just gets old after awhile. Plus after last weekend, I'd rather shoot myself than get that drunk." I shook my head, remembering how terrible I had felt the next morning.

"Give her time. She'll be drinking soon." Mike winked as he slid up next to his girlfriend after visiting a couple of his teammates on the opposite side of the bar.

The night dragged on uneventfully as the hockey boys downed drink after drink as they laughed and tried to be college boys during their weekend off of hockey. The season was quickly winding down and although Tony and I never talked about it, I knew he was sad. His college career was ending which meant that his dad wouldn't be his coach anymore. Tony cherished the experience he was having so much, the time to be close to his dad and play for the team he had always wanted to, and he wasn't quite ready for it to end. Of course there was a way to extend the season, but the Gophers needed to sweep Denver in order for that to happen. Despite the optimism, everyone knew that wouldn't happen.

"Excuse me, ladies?" The bartender smiled, his eyes twinkling as he looked at Jess, Kara, and I before glancing quickly to our boyfriends. "These are for you, from the gentlemen in the back." He pointed over Kara's shoulder to where three men were standing all of them tall blondes who looked like they had walked right out of a Calvin Klein magazine.

Each one of our boyfriends stopped what they were doing, whether they were talking or listening, and turned in the direction of the bartender. Tony was the first to place his fiery gaze on the men in the back, then came Mike, and finally Jordan who scoffed.

"Okay pretty boys." Jordan pulled Jess into his side, dipping her and making a show of kissing her. Jess squealed against Jordan's mouth, grasping his shoulders tightly. Mike grabbed Kara and chose to wrap his arm around her, whispering inappropriate things in her ear just to see her blush along with receiving a sexy kiss.

"Do not drink that." Tony told me, stepping in between the men in the back and me. He pulled my chin down so his head was blocking their view of me, his lips hovering over mine. His breath danced across my lips, his eyes softening from jealous and angry, to sweet and caring as he smiled lightly down at me. He licked his lips before dipping his head all the way, his lips setting ever so softly against mine. I literally melted off the bar stool and into Tony's arms, his muscular limbs wrapping around my waist and picking me up. I wrapped my legs around his waist as his tongue slid against my bottom lip making me moan in approval.

"I wasn't going to," I breathed out once he had pulled away. He still held me in his arms as I looked down into his eyes, smiling just because he was. He patted my butt before setting me back on my feet, my heels touching the floor again with a soft click. I scrunched my nose in distaste as he went back to his conversation, laughing because he saw the look out of the corner of his eye. He pulled my into his chest, letting me lean against him while him and his teammates trashed Denver to get pumped for their upcoming series.

"Hey Looch," Joey called, making a whipping motion once Tony was looking at him. Tony just shrugged and shook his head.

"At least I have someone to be whipped about." Tony rolled his eyes at his best friend who very drunkenly told him to stick his beer bottle up his ass.

"Oh wait, your head's already up there," Joey snorted, sitting on the bar stool that I had been occupying. Tony's hands went down my back, fiddling with the waist band of my jeans, his fingers slipping to touch my backside affectionately. "Why are you even dating him? You are so out of his league. She's too pretty for you." Joey shoved Tony's shoulder, making the two of us sway slightly before Tony held us upright again.

"You know, I ask myself that everyday and the only answer I can come up with, is that I love him and he makes me incredibly happy." I rested my chin against Tony's chest tilted so that I was looking into his shining green eyes.

"Ew." Joey made a gagging noise as Tony and I rolled our eyes at his best friend together.

"Go away if you're going to be a drunken asshole." Tony told him, gesturing to where the other half of the hockey team was sitting, most of them completely hammered.

"That would require walking and I'm not sure I could do that right now." Joey chuckled. He grabbed my water and I opened my mouth to stop him, but he chugged the whole thing in front of me, his baby blues twinkling as he set the now empty glass against the bar again. I scoffed at him and shook my head, letting out a deep sigh.

"You hockey boys think you run the show."

"That's because we do Loochie." Jay Barriball laughed, sucking down his fourth beer of the night.

"What did you just call me?" I asked him, shaking my head rapidly to show my confusion.

"Loochie. It's your new nickname. Everyone gets a nickname." He shrugged. I looked up at Tony and he bit his lip to hold back his smile.

"Hey, I'd take it. They could think of worse." He chuckled.

"Tony Looch!" A voice called from across the bar. We both looked up as Eric Decker walked in, striding in as people whispered and pointed at the star receiver.

"Hey Decker, what you up to bro?" Tony asked, pulling away to give Eric a man hug. I smiled as Eric turned towards me, extending his hand.

"Who's this pretty lady?" He asked, tilting his head to the side as he smiled at me. He was gorgeous, but from what I heard he was still with his high school sweetheart and head over heels for her.

"This is my girlfriend Molly. Mol, Decker." Tony laughed knowing he didn't have to actually introduce us. He pulled me in front of him, letting me rest my back against his chest.

"Aw cute. Look at you dating out of your league little Lucia." Eric punched Tony's should and let out a soft crackle as Joey sprayed out his beer.

"That's what I said!" Joey exclaimed, laughing like a drunken idiot.

"So Looch, I noticed you haven't been playing much lately?" Eric questioned, picking up his beer off the bar. He took a sip of the golden liquid, a smirk tilting his mouth. "What happened? Didn't clean your room?" The guys surrounding Tony burst out laughing as Tony chuckled, his chest rumbling sweetly against my back.

"Mom told on me." He shrugged, pressing a kiss to the shell of my ear. "Riley let you out of the house?" Eric nodded, a sweet smile on his face at the mention of his girlfriend.

"Yeah, she cut my leash for the night."

"Good to hear."

"Yeah, but I gotta meet Adam. He wants to talk to me about something. It was nice to see you, let's hang soon. But only if it's okay with the pretty lady," Eric winked at me, giving Tony a handshake before he walked away to find his quarterback.

"He's hot. Just so you know, I'd leave you for him."

"That's cute. Not." Tony rolled his eyes at me, placing several kisses against my neck, teasing me with his teeth and tongue. "You would never leave me."

"You're right." I mused softly to him, rotating to face him. His fingers went to my chin and tilted it up to place a delicate kiss to my lips. I closed my eyes, sleep tugging at my body as his hands slid down to my butt again, giving it a hearty squeeze. "Hello captain." I snorted at his obvious attempt of coming on to me. "It's not happening tonight."

"Fuck my life." Tony muttered under his breath, dramatically pouting at me. "Why?"

"Because."

He sighed, his lips jutting out even more to express his deep dislike of my choice. "Fine. But only because I love you. And only if you make up for it tomorrow." I closed my eyes before blinking rapidly, pursing my lips to hold back the smile.

"What do you suggest?"

"Blow jobs. Maybe a little rub and tug under the table when we go out to dinner." He shrugged, "I guess it's really up to you." I burst out laughing, smashing my face into his sweatshirt covered chest as he rubbed my back. His chest rumbled with his laughter too, making me laugh harder until tears were pooling in the corner of my eyes. These were the moments I lived for with him when he could make me feel so incredibly loved and happy that it made me cry.
***

When you love someone, there is nothing worse than seeing them in pain. I sat perfectly still as I watched Tony lean against the boards his eyes taking in a full capacity crowd at Mariucci, taking it in for the last time. The seniors lingered on the ice, staring up at the crowd as they clapped for them before the boys slowly filtered from the ice. My heart cracked in half, pain shooting from every tingling nerve in my body. Tony bumped fists with Mike Carmen as he skated past before he was the last person on the ice. A tear slipped from my eye as he lumbered very slowly from the ice. He tapped fists with each little kid who leaned over the railing until the Lucia on his back finally disappeared.

Kara and Jess were silent next to me as I pursed my lips, sucking my cheeks in and fluttering my eyes to hold back the rest of the tears threatening to fall.

"This fucking sucks." I muttered, rubbing my fingers under my eyes softly.

"Yeah," Kara breathed out, her face grim, but at least her boyfriend had one more year left to play as a Gopher; Tony had none. I pushed out a sad sigh and slid down in my seat, my legs hanging over the chair in front of me. I leaned back, looking over at where Joyce was still sitting with Tony's siblings, a sad look on her face as she stared at the tunnel Tony had gone down about ten minutes before.

"Ready?" Jess murmured softly. Kara and I nodded, the three of us linking arms as we climbed the stairs. I glanced down at the seat I would no longer sit in and tried not to feel a horrible pang of sadness at the finality of this whole night. I wished the outcome was different; I wished Tony had one more chance to give it his all. I wished I could have given the whole team the faith and the energy that I possessed to help them push back against Denver and their buzzing offense, but it was useless. The Gopher team collapsed in on themselves from the beginning, but the seniors played their hearts out, getting nothing except a final game in return.

I leaned my head against the wall, my eyes slipping closed as we all waited silently, the chit chat among the other families and friends a dull murmur compared to usual post-game nights. Jess and Kara didn't talk, each of them too upset to even mutter a word. I focused my energy on taking deep breaths and anything else that would keep me from crying. But when the boys came up, one by one instead of in groups, I knew that it was only a matter of time before Tony came up and I would have a tough time fighting back my emotions.

Mike was the first of the boyfriends to come up, his lips turned down in what seemed to be a permanent frown as Kara wrapped him in her arms, his forehead resting against her shoulder as she rubbed his back. Jordan was next, pulling Jess into his chest tightly and holding her as if she was the one who needed to be consoled. I bit my lip as they all told me goodbye, the arena quickly thining out until only the families of seniors were left.

David came up first along with Ryan Flynn, both of them looking down at the ground as they silently walked to their families. I made my way over to the rest of the Lucia family, all of us silent as we watched the boys filter out, each of them with hung heads. Brian Schack came next, going to his girlfriend and tenderly pulling her into a hug. Jay Barriball, who was red shirted, came next, all of the seniors dwindling until Tony was the only one yet to appear.

"Come on Ton," Jessica whispered softly, running a hand through her long, light brown hair. Ali bit her lip as we all watched the elevator. The machine dinged and the three Lucia boys all walked out together. Tony looked terrible, wretched even, as he slowly walked towards us, his hands stuffed into the pockets of his dress pants, his mouth pulled into a grim line. He greeted all of his family with hugs before he got to me. He lifted his gaze for the first time since he got off the ice, his sad and slightly swollen green eyes meeting mine. I wished he would have kept his gaze plastered to the floor.

I reached out without even thinking, grabbing the sides of his face and pulling him towards me. Our lips met in a painful and sweet kiss, all of our emotions being expressed through our lips as they moved together in a silent beat. I told him how much I felt for him and how sorry I was that his career had to end like this. I could feel Tony's pain as he lightly tugged on my bottom lip, his arms grabbing my hips as he pushed me back to my tippy toes. He was keeping the kiss appropriate for the sake of his family. I had completely forgotten they were there, so wrapped up in Tony and his needs that the rest of the world melted away.

Tony kept his forehead resting against mine, his eyes squeezed tightly stuck, his eyelids crinkling from the pressure. I bit my lip as I raked my eyes over his face as a tear slipped from my eye.

"It's going to be okay, Tony." I murmured to him, my voice cracking and shaking as I tried to console him the best I could. I didn't sound convincing to myself, but Tony seemed to believe me as he nodded and placed a quick kiss against my lips.

The Lucia family and I walked out all together, Tony's arm slung over my shoulder as I laced our left hands together. I rested my head lightly against his shoulder, the back of it bouncing against his muscles as we walked. Tony said goodbye to his family who nodded in understanding why he wasn't in the mood to answer their looks or their questions. He got into the car, skipping the gentlemanly portion of the night and staring down at the steering wheel while I slid into the passenger seat. I stared at the dashboard as the silence swirled around our bodies. Tony was completely zoned out staring ahead as if looking into the distance or the future.

"It's really over," he whispered to me, his hands gripping the steering wheel until his knuckles were as white as the snow on the ground. The sentence left his mouth and as if he was realizing it for the first time, he let his head drop to his hands, a sob shaking his body. I didn't know what to do at first until I snapped into action, climbing over the center console and straddling his lap. I moved his arms away, wrapping them around my waist as his head fell against my chest. I kissed the top of his head lovingly, letting him cry softly into my body.

Normally, seeing any man cry was weird to me because it showed a form of weakness that I couldn't quite understand with someone so masculine. But in Tony's tears I didn't see weakness, instead I saw the strength and love it took to show someone exactly how you were feeling even though expressing himself was a total role reversal. And instead of being totally turned off by the fact that he was crying, watching him break down made me love him even more.