I'm the Kind of Human Wreckage That You Love.

I didn’t wake up until about 2:30 PM. Thank God it was Sunday. Gerard was still snoring in the room across the hall when I tiptoed out to the kitchen. I always felt I had to pussyfoot around because the place was so big. I put the coffee pot on and turned on the waffle iron. I always kept a batch or waffle/pancake batter in the fridge because it was the perfect hangover cure. Mine wasn’t so bad, but I knew his would be just colossal.
My brain was fuzzy when I walked out of the kitchen into the living room, catapulted my self on to the couch, and “Ow! Fucking Shit!” The pain from my knee had returned. I quickly muffled my groans and limped into my bathroom. I hadn’t unpacked everything so there were half-full boxes everywhere. I shuffled through some boxes under the sink and finally found my knee brace. I pulled off my, at this point, uncomfortably tight jeans, and slipped on my purple Ace bandage. I remember searching on eBay for weeks to find a purple one with Frankie. I almost sent him to Bellevue with that adventure, I drove him up a tree. Haha, ‘up a tre-...’ I laughed at the thought.
My mind began to wander as I took off my bra that had been on all night, left it on the sink, and went to the kitchen to check the progress of the coffee. It was completely brewed and I made a giant cup with tons of sugar and milk. I was curious about Gerard, and how he hadn’t woken up yet, even with all my noise. To feed my curiosity I slipped into his room.
He was basically still passed out on his stomach where I left him. I sipped my coffee and wondered. Just wondered. About him, the party, Frankie, Mikey and Sido. I stepped closer to the bed and bent over to try and look at his face. I set my coffee down on the floor. I tried to think of something so say.

“Hey... Hey, you.” It was all I could think of.

He stirred a little.

“C’mon, I know you’re awake. Aren’t you? I’m makin’ waffles! Exciting. I don’t want you to miss it.”

He flipped on to his side so that his back was facing me. I stood back up and put my hands on my hips.

“Well...”

While saying this, I realized I still only had underwear and a shirt on and decided to leave the room before he saw me and got the wrong idea. I grabbed my coffee and slid into my room to find some pants. As I hopped into some super sweet black Hustler shorts I heard him sit up on the bed, but almost immediately lay back down. I sauntered across the hall and leaned on the doorway. I guess he heard me because he kept his eyes closed but said,

“Did I hear waffles?”

“Yes you did.”

“Alright! But I’m pretty sure I’ve forgotten how to stand up.” He said as if he were talking in his sleep.

“It’ll come back to you.”

He laughed and I went to pour some batter into the waffle iron. I guess he remembered how to walk again because I was shortly joined by him in the kitchen. He wandered in and look completely dazed.

“Just sit down and I will serve you, darling.” I let out in my Dracula-esque voice, “You want some coffee?”

“Desperately.”

I poured him a cup and he drank the first cup black, practically downed it. His next was full of sugar and milk like mine. When the waffles were done, he followed me to the couch and I turned the tv on. We watched Oprah and ate our breakfast/lunch in silence. I wolfed mine down, and he wasn’t far behind me. Seconds and thirds followed and we finally started speaking. I started.

“So who’s Mikey. And Sido.”

“Well, Mikey’s my little brother and Sido, short for Sidonie, is his girlfriend of, like, two years.”

“So that’s why he was taking care of you.”

“Yeah... It only happens sometimes. You know how it gets. Or maybe you don’t, I don’t know. The waffles were great, by the way.”

“Thanks, so you live at home?” I caught his attempt to change the subject, but I was very interested in him.

“Wait a minute,” he took a long pause, “didn’t you say something about meeting me before?” he interrupted and changed the subject.

“You’re a pretty lucid drunk if you remember that.” I said stunned.

“I think I’ve gotten too used to it or something. So I’m right?”

“Yeah, that was an interesting night,” I glanced up at him and he had a ‘keep going...’ look on his face so I decided I would, “Um, we were at the Eyeball Records party. I work there with Frankie, but I had broken up with my boyfriend and went for a smoke, and I saw you there. In the alley, I mean.”

“I think I remember, oh yeah, didn’t you have something on your face...” He trailed off at the end realizing what was on my face, “He did it didn’t he...”

I inhaled deeply and let out a, “Yeah,” under my breath. I felt my eyes well up a bit. He must of noticed because the next thing he said was,

“Well, if I told you you had a gorgeous body, would you hold it against me?” He said it with the biggest, cutest, fakest smile.

I laughed, but joked back by saying, “Excuse me? I invite you into my home and you try to pick me up?” I sounded truly offended, but I knew he would get it.

“Yeah, about that. This. I don’t do this. Things like this, I mean.”

“Oh, good, so I’m not the only one,” I trailed off, but quickly recanted, “but, it’s fine with me, though.”

We both laughed again and started to make fun of the crazy people on Oprah. The show finished and Gerard surprised me by saying he was hungry again. I was glad for it though because I didn’t want him to leave.
I started to make another batch of waffles. That second meal was where he really started to open up, not so much about his family, but his interests. We found out we both were in love with the Misfits. His favorite band was Iron Maiden. I had heard some of their stuff, but he told me all about what I was missing. He had a very peculiar vernacular and a bizarre way of explaining things, but he was very articulate. His laugh was great, too. It went up at the end when he thought something was really funny. He was practically a different person from the night before. He was hilarious and exciting last night, but today he was sweet and charming, and I fell in love with him. What had Frankie been thinking? He needs to learn not to judge a book by it’s cover.

I didn’t even hear the phone ring. He directed my attention to it, and when I picked it up, it was Frankie.

“Hey, princess. How’s you’re morning going?”

“Pretty good, actually,” I looked back at Gerard and smiled at him, he grinned big back. I didn’t even pick up on Frankie’s tone, because if I did I would have known this was coming.

“How’s yours?” I extend groggily

“Good, I guess it would of been great if you’d of SHOWN UP THIS MORNING!”

“What?...” I whispered out of embarrassment, I was sure Gerard heard him.

“I left you, like, a dozen messages today. We have a major crisis with the cd artwork.”

“Well, where the fuck is she?” I heard Shaun yell from next to Frank loud enough for me to hear.

“Oh, shit. I’m so sorry, Frankie. I had a fucking hangover, and, like, I haven’t even left the kitchen today.” I stumbled out.

“Well could you just get down here. Pronto, too, bitch!”

Oh, our love.

“Oh, shut the fuck up Frankie, I’m coming. Where are you?”

I grabbed an old receipt and wrote on the back of it their location. I glanced back at Gerard who was downing his coffee and then met my gaze. Smiling and laughing awkwardly, I walked over to my purse and started throwing shit it in, hoping Gerard would get the hint. Saying I needed him to leave would just kill me.

“So, when will you be back? Approximately.” he said, making himself comfortable on my couch.