I'm the Kind of Human Wreckage That You Love.

“Why?” I asked, close to panic, She was my Grandma, too.

“She wouldn’t tell me.”

“Well, we have to go. Now.” I ordered.

“I know, c’mon.” He led me out the door, hiding his panic.

On the way there, I called Mikey.

“Hav-have you her-heard, fuck, have you heard about Grandma, Mikey?” I stuttered out.

“Yeah, I'm going there now.” He responded, quickly.

“Okay, we’ll see you there, then.” I hung up the phone and accelerated to seventy miles an hour.

“It can't be too bad if we haven’t heard anything, right?” I asked after the deafening silence of the car had gotten to me.

“Funny... I was thinking the complete opposite.”

“But, she sounded fine on the phone, right?”

“She always sounds fine. She amazing.”

“Amazing and strong, Gerard. She survived two world wars, she can survive whatever this is.”

He nodded weakly and returned to staring out the window.

We got to the hospital and hurriedly found her room number. We met Gerard’s mom and dad outside the room. His dad pulled him into a big hug.

“It’s good to see ya, kid.” He said.

“Yeah,” Gerard smiled, seemingly relieved, “What’s going on?”

“Well, she was sick with a cold, but didn’t pay any attention to it and it spread to her lungs. The docs are giving her antibiotics for pneumonia.”

“Pneumonia?” Gerard asked.

“That’s not that bad, right? They’re treating it.” I asked.

“Yeah-”

“Can I see her?” Gerard cut in.

“She’s sleeping, sweetheart.” His mother told us.

“Oh.”

“How are you guys doing?” I politely asked the, very tired looking, Ways, “When did you get here?”

“We’re doing fine, thank you, honey.” His mother responded.

“Good, good.” I said.

Gerard went to sit on a bench by the window, his dad followed and sat next to him.

“You wanna grab some tea, or something?” I offered.

“Sure.”

We walked over to a hot drinks machine in the cafeteria. We both got a paper mug of tea and sat at a table.

“So how has Helen been doing lately? I know we haven’t been around as much as we’d like.”

“She was doing fine. But she had many years and her body is just tired you know? She misses you guys though. You remind her of her and her husband.”

I smiled, flattered, “We’ve really tried to make an effort, but our schedules are just so insane. And I can tell Gerard is hurting about not being around right now. He probably feels like he could've stopped it.”

“I really don’t know if she’ll make it.” She said painfully honest.

“I think she will.” I optimistically added.

She smiled back and I thought I saw a tear in her eye.

“I’m here to talk. You probably think it strange to talk to me about something like this, and I understand. I know how personal this stuff is. But, really, if you need anything, I’ll be over making dinner, washing clothes, you name it.” I presented with a laugh that made her laugh, too.

“Thank you,” She extended, “So how are you and him doing?”

“We’re doing great.”

“Any dun-dun-dee-dun yet?”

She started humming ‘Here Comes the Bride’.

“Oh, no, Not yet at least. Maybe it’ll happen one day.” I said painfully honest.

“I think it will.” She optimistically added.

_________________________________________________________________________________________

We stayed late into the night and into early the next morning. I had to leave for work, but Gerard decided to stay with Mikey and his parents. Helen didn’t wake up before I left, so I told Gerard to send a hello and give her a hug and a kiss for me.

I was emotionally and physically drained at work and Venetian Silicone could tell.

“Okay, what’s wrong with you?” Julian asked, taking off his bass and walking over to me.

“Uuuhhh, I spent all night at the hospital. Gerard’s grandma is there.” I rested my head in my hands and then brushed my hair back.

“Oh, wow. Is she okay?” Katy asked.

“Pneumonia.” I responded.

“Well, a lot of old people get that and they live, so she has a good chance.”

I took a deep breath, jaded by Julian bluntness, “I guess you’re right. Gerard’s way freaked, though. We haven’t seen her in a few weeks, and he feels like shit about it.”

“But that shit was out of your hands, you’ve had a crazy few months.” Tim reassured.

“I need to go back after work, too.” I reminded myself.

“Well, we can finish up here if you need to go.”

“Really, guys. You’re my lifesavers! You’ll cover me right?”

“What’s family for?” Katy said.

“Christmas presents?” Julian asked.

Tim threw a pick at his head.

I laughed at their goofiness and sped away to the hospital.

‘What was gonna happen now? Gerard leaves in two days. He’ll never leave if she stays sick...’ I asked myself, praying for the best as I stepped through the sliding glass doors.

“I’m here for Way, in 423.” I announced to the desk clerk.

“Go right up, miss.” The clerk directed me.

While his mom and dad, were in the hall, Gerard was in Helen’s room with Mikey.

“Should I go in?” I quietly asked.

“Sure.”

I tip toed in and heard Helen telling a story. It was one of my favorite of hers about how she ate dinner next to Robert Boccino, the leader of New Jersey’s Organized Crime Task Force. He made a pass at her, but she turned him down.

“Hi,” I whispered, “Hi, Grandma, how ya doing?” I asked.

“I’m fine. Come sit down.”

I walked over to Gerard and pecked him on the cheek. Helen smiled warmly at us and continued her story.

She finished half a dozen of her wild tales and kept us in stitches until a nurse came in and told us she had to rest.

“Oh, B.S.,” She complained, “It’s just a bad cold. I don’t know why I’ve got all these damn wires in me.”

“Grandma, you know you’re-” Mikey started to explain.

“Yeah, yeah, I know.” She waved him away.

I chuckled at her spunk.

“Get some rest, Grandma.” I advised.

“I will, darling. Don’t worry about me. And make sure that boy of yours doesn’t worry himself to death, either.”

“I promise.” I said.

It was late into the night again as we waited for the doctor to tell us something. One finally came and told us that the antibiotics were doing what they were supposed to do, and she should recover.

Gerard and Mikey were practically asleep in waiting room chairs, “Gerard you should come home and take a shower.” I suggested.

“No. I want to stay.” He sharply said, snapping his head up.

“She’s right, Gerard. Go home. We’ll call if anything happens.” His mother guaranteed.

He looked over at me and I pushed hair behind his ears, nodded and smiled, "It'll be fine."

“Okay. C’mon Mikes. We’ll give you a ride.” Gerard said, hitting his brother next to him.

“Huh? What? I wasn’t asleep.” He exclaimed, snapping up just as Gerard had done.

We dropped off Mikey and then went home. Gerard took a long shower and I put him to bed before I headed into work with just a handful sleep in 48 hours. Gerard was leaving tomorrow and I needed to finish stuff so I could drop them at the airport tomorrow morning.