You wear me like a locket around your throat

I slipped the black dress over my head and tugged on some black ballet slippers. I looked

in the mirror approving of the person staring back at me.

"You ready?" I asked Ryan walking out of my bedroom. He nodded setting down the

magazine he had been reading. We headed down to the elevator and made our way out of

the building and into the car waiting for us. Inside, Joy, Spencer and Jon were talking.

Everyone had a grim expression. I smiled at the three and slid in next to Spencer. Jon was

driving and Joy sat shotgun. Ryan sat next to me closing the Door behind him and we were

off to the cemetery. As if the world knew of Brendon's death the sky was clouded and you

could feel electricity in the air. It was a fairly short drive to our destination. We parked and

exited heading towards the grave where our beloved friend was about to be buried. I didn't

personally know him, but it felt like we had a certain connection with our lives. it all seemed

to tie together.

Within an hour the service started. It was mostly kids from school and adults in Brendon's

life like his piano teacher and his boss. Not one member of his family besides his sister

showed up. The priest refused to speak as well so instead we all took turns talking about

him. It was Jon's turn to speak and I shifted in my seat.

"Brendon. Brendon Urie was my best friend."" He started clasping his hands onto of the

podium. "He was so great at everything. He hated to be called perfect but sometimes it

seemed like he was. A gifted student. A friendly and happy person. An amazing friend.

Everyone loved him." Jon choked up a bit and wiped a few tears away from his eyes.. "He

died way to young and for reasons that were unfair. The world needs its Brendon back." He

seemed to chuckle to himself before turning his attention back to the crowd listening to him

speak. it seemed as if every girl was wiping tears and every guy was choking up inside.

That's the type of person Brendon was, the type to cause this type of reaction. "You know, he

would have hated this. He was so god damn happy." Jon laughed and pulled up a boom

box setting it on top of the podium. He hit play and 'under the sea' From the Little mermaid

started playing. "And he loved this song." He smiled and sat back down in his seat.

The crowds mood lifted as people started clapping and singing along. I looked around me

and faced my Friends. Life seemed to go in slow motion as girls hugged their friends and

placed memories on top of Brendon's casket. Boys, well boys did their own little things

tapping the casket and smiling and comforting their cry girlfriends. The song really was

right. We were a mess up here.

"Ryan," I smiled and sat down on his lap. We were at Jon's house for that little party people

have after a funeral. "Hey babe." He smiled and kissed my cheek.

"We have to talk." I told him standing up, grabbing his hand and walking us out into the

backyard.

"What do we have to talk about?" He asked taking a sip from his red cup.

"You know that little uh, appointment I had?" I gently asked. I knew I shouldn't have waited

until the night before. i knew it! God damn me this is totally unfair to him.

"Yeah," He nodded looking a bit worried.

"Well, I've been trying to get into Juliart as you know." I looked down at my feet avoiding his

gaze.

"Yeah I know. You've been talking about it for years." He laughed lifting my chin with his

finger.

"Well, I got in." I told him looking into his eyes. He smiled and hugged me.

"That's great! I'm so proud of you! Oh my god! I don't know how you can stand waiting two

years but that's amazing! Oh my god!" I laughed nervously as he wrapped his arms around

me squeezing tightly.

"Ryan," I hate this I hate this I hate this. "I'm not going in two years. They have an early

admission program. I-I have enough credits to finish high school online and take college

courses there. Ryan, I-I'm leaving in the morning." His grip loosened around me and his

face looked sunken.

"Y-your leaving? Tomorrow?" He gasped. His facial expression mixed with disbelief and

shock.

I nodded. We stood there silently as the party carried on inside.

"I have no one." He sighed under his breath looking down at his shoes.

"Ryan," I started placing a hand on his arm.

"Joy, shes moving to California next week after school gets out. Your leaving for across the

country. Brendon's dead and Jon's talking about leaving home and moving in with his Aunt

in Chicago. I'm going to be here." His eyes started to tear up and I sighed hugging him

tightly. "You will never ever be alone Ryan. Call me anytime. E-mail. Text message. Instant

Message. Hell I'll come here on the weekend. Ryan trust me. you will not be alone." I smiled

at him and he nodded before pulling me in for one more hug. This was so much harder

than I thought it would be. I had no idea everyone else was leaving.

"Well we should get back inside."

We stood at the gate in the Las Vegas airport. Ryan was next to me and Spencer was

talking to a cute pilot.

"Call me when you land OK?" Ryan smiled. I nodded and double checked I had my phone

with me and not somewhere in my suitcase because that would be a pain.

"Of course love."

"OK, go know before you a) miss your flight or b) i decide I cant live without you here and

steal you away." He laughed and kissed me before pushing me towards the flight attendant

taking tickets.

"Spencer James Smith!" I called out getting his attention. Walking towards me and pulled

me into a hug. "Jeez. I finally move back by you and you leave me." He laughed,

"Sorry." I smiled.

"You take good care of Ryan for me OK? And take good care of yourself." I told him while

picking up my Carry on bag.

"Of course. Call me when you get a chance OK? Tell me all about the big apple." I nodded

and started walking towards the flight attendant. She accepted my ticket and let me pass. I

looked back one last time, waving at my two best friends. I started walking again when I

heard Ryan call out my name.

"I love you." He shouted blowing me a kiss. I swear I could feel my cheeks turn 10 shades of

red.

"I love you too Ryan. See you soon." With that I boarded the plane taking my seat in first

class. One of the many advantages of having a rich father. I pulled out my headphones and

slipped them on. 'Divine intervention' By Taking back Sunday started to play.

Despondent, distracted,
You're vicious and romantic;
These are a few of my favorite things.
All of those flavors and
This is what you choose:
Past the blues, past the blues,
And on to something new,

I saw Ryan standing look at me through the large window of the gate. I smiled and waved

placing my hand against the window. He smiled and placed his hand on the window as

well. The plane started rolling down the runway and I drew a heart with my finger. He

grinned and clutched his chest. He going to be OK. We all are.

Well, at least i hope to god we are.

The plane lifted into the air and I thought of my next adventure and the one back home still.

I sat back listening to the words.

Something real, make it timeless,
An act of God and nothing less will be accepted.
I said real, make it timeless,
An act of God and nothing less will be accepted.
Now if you're calling me out,
Then count me out. {/I]

I sat back in my seat thinking of the road ahead and the miles past. I'm going to miss

Vegas. I'm going to miss Ryan. I'm going to miss Joy. Miss my Spencer. Miss Jon. Hell I'm

going to miss Brendon for just being that guy that somehow connected everything. Nothings

going to be like it was. But I guess all we can do is move forward and deal with the choices

made for us. Just deal. It'll all work out.