Living on Perfectly Remembered Memories

I looked at the clock with a vicious glare. When was she going to wake up?! I need to talk to her about last night and what she told me. My best friend, she's in love with me? Yeah right. That was the beer talking. She was drunk so what she told me couldn't be true. How could she lie to me?

I remember Brian telling me that whatever you say when you're drunks were thoughts you had before the alcohol took control of your body. I'm so fucking confused...

"Matthew are you okay? You look really confused," mom asked, placing another pancake on my plate.

I stuffed eggs into my mouth. If I didn't eat, she'd worry. "Yeah I'm fine. Just wondering when Fran is going to wake up."

That killed the conversation but I didn't care. I finished eating and went back upstairs with a bottle of water and a bottle of Advil. She was still asleep in the same position I left her in last night. I could already tell she wasn't going to wake up any time soon.

Feeling sleepy from eating breakfast, I climbed back onto my spot on my bed and shut my eyes. I was determined to talk to her about this after we both woke up.

I woke up awhile later, feeling really warm all of a sudden. I blinked a few times and looked at the air conditioner. It was on full blast so why am I so warm?

I opened my eyes fully and looked down. Fran's head rested on my chest, her right arm was in a slightly clawed motion against my left pec, and her leg wrapped around my waist. She was another move away from lying directly on top of me.

I rolled her to the other side of the bed and jumped out of bed. That was so awkward! I shuddered and slapped at my arms. That didn't happen; it didn't happen.

"You're so loud," a hoarse voice said. I jumped again. Fran was staring at me with sleepy eyes.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"Is the Advil and water for me?" she asked pointing to the things next to the bed. I nodded. "Thanks."

How is it possible she's oblivious to what she did? Does she do this all the time to Rafael? I bet they sleep around all the time. I bet the ass has slept in her bed. Ugh, disgusting.

The water bottle Franchesa drank from landed to the side of my head. "Where's the food?"

I sat down on the bed next to her. She was still lying down, her hand slapped over forehead. "Do you remember last night?" I whispered again.

"Not at all."

Ow. Recover quickly Matt; you can do it. "You got wasted, was funny," I muttered, looking away.

So she didn't know what she said last night. How am I supposed to ask now? Why should I care so much? Oh right, I remember when I used to want Franchesa so bad I'd do anything to make her mine.

Best friend.

That was screaming in my head. Although she was right next to me, I closed my eyes, and Franchesa was all I could see. Crap, this isn't good.

"Meet you downstairs," I said quickly and jumped onto the coach.

What is happening? Why is her telling me she's in love with me bothering me? I know she isn't, she knows she isn't so what was the matter? She doesn't even remember telling it to me. Well, some people lie when they drink. I bet Fran is one of those people.

"Are you okay?"

I jumped again. People have to stop doing that! My best friend sat down next to me with a plate of pancakes and eggs. I watched silently as she ate her food. She seemed happy now eating her cold eggs and pancakes. What did happen last night?

"Why were you so angry last night?"

The fork in her hand dropped onto her plate with a clang as her eyebrows scrunched together. I could see her eyes turn a shade darker as last night's events seemed to happen all over again in her mind. Maybe it was wrong to bring it up.

"He said you were going to use me."

"He...as in Rafael?"

"Yeah."

Wonderful! I have a wonderful reason to hurt him now! How dare the asshole make assumptions of me when he doesn't even know me?! How am I going to "use" my best friend?

"Matt," Franchesa pleaded, touching my clenched fist. "Don't do anything."

"Why not?" I spat.

"It isn't worth it."

"And? He obviously hurt you. That's why you were drinking last night."

"You noticed huh?"

"I'm your best friend, I notice these things. So tell me why I shouldn't punch the bitch in the face?"

"I just want you two to get along! Is that too much to ask for?" she groaned, lying back against the couch with the pillow against her face.

"We got along fine until he made you angry! How am I supposed to use you in the first place?"

The pillow dropped to the floor and Fran crawled next to my side. She looked into my eyes, making my anger die down instantly. She looked like she was about to cry.

"You would never use me like the other girls right?"

"Is that what last night was about?" I asked softly. She nodded and looked down. I saw the teardrops make wet marks on her jeans. I sighed. "Come here love."

She whimpered and crawled into my lap. Her head rested against my chest, just to the side of my neck. I hugged her close to me as her arms circled my body.

"I love you and I would never use you. You're my...best friend. You'll never be like other girls."

"Thank you Matty. I love you too."

You love me, but are you in love with me?