The Ballerina

Acelynn had awakened sore and stiff. Sleeping on a cramped couch alone was one thing. But sleeping on one with someone alongside you was a whole new endeavor.

Acelynn took in a deep breath just as she usually did every morning when she woke up. She was careful not to disturb Luke, who was sound asleep and snoring lightly as usual. He looked so young when he was unconscious. So relaxed… so free. It was as if Luke wasn’t Luke anymore, or at least not the same person with the same memories. This Luke wasn’t haunted by a tragic past and destroyed emotions.

The ballerina had slept on top of her friend. Not awkwardly or intrusively, but like they were friends who fell asleep. Just as they were.

She maneuvered herself over Luke making sure never to wake him. Her body felt cold now that it wasn’t protected by his warm body heat. But Luke wasn’t awake as she stood over him, so Acelynn counted it as a win.

With a limp from sleeping wrong, Acelynn made her way up the stairs. It was dark in the cool basement, so she had to feel her way to the door and turn the knob to open it. When she did, the bright sunlight from the opened front door slammed against her eyes causing her to wince away like an ancient vampire.

She stuffed her face in the crook of her bent elbow and continued to fight her way to the kitchen to get a glass of water. Every once in a while she would lift her arm to see if her eyes were still sensitive – they were.

Someone would think that all of the mundane excitement would take her mind off of the most important event in her life right then. Her fight with Tuck. Acelynn wasn’t even sure it was a fight. She wasn’t sure what it was at all. It was a bunch of nonsense they mixed themselves in.

Acelynn gave up trying to shield her eyes and just let her eyes adjust to the sun’s rays coming from the window above the sink where she stood. It was harsh but it only took a few moments before her eyes adjusted and she was fine.

After she got her glass of water she took it to her room to finish off. She also needed to get dressed and go shopping for a Christmas present for both Luke and Tuck. There was a small mall only half a mile away that she could walk to. After a month and a half of the freezing winter, Acelynn was used to the cold.

Acelynn opened the cherry oak door slowly making sure it didn’t squeal. In the basement you could hear footsteps above you as well as moving chairs and squeaky doors. She didn’t want to wake Luke up – she had already bothered him enough in twenty-four hours. Because of her problems, she didn’t even ask how his date went with Cheyenne.

The girl sighed as she walked into her room and closed the door again. She went directly to her dresser and opened it. Maybe she could go to the mall, shop, and be back before Luke even woke up. She had no idea where Tuck was, but at that moment, she didn’t really want to think about it.

Acelynn picked out a white hoodie that fit snugly on her body. She also pulled out a pair of jeans that had a tear in the left knee. The jeans fit loosely because they were a pair of Luke’s old jeans when he was a few years younger. They fit nicely and it made Acelynn feel like home when she wore them. She didn’t wear them often around Tuck, but she didn’t really care about his feelings at that moment.

When she dressed, she turned around and saw it.

On her bed – more specifically on her pillow – sat a yellowed piece of parchment. An envelope. On the front cover it had a scrawled word in elegant handwriting in black pen. She didn’t know what it said from the angle and the distance from it, but she was pretty sure it said her name.

Acelynn wasn’t sure why her heart skipped a beat or why she held her breath for a moment, because it was only a piece of paper. A piece of paper shouldn’t have scared her that much but it did. It scared her a lot and she had no idea why.

She slowly crept towards the letter as if it were a wild animal ready to run. But when she got close enough, she reached out and ran her fingers across the rough texture. It was bumpy and would have warmed her fingers with friction if she had moved fast enough. Acelynn gingerly took it in her hands and held it away from her body.

The brunette had been right; on the front of the letter it read ‘Acelynn’ in big, cursive letters. It was like a professional calligrapher had written it in a fancy pen in a fancy studio. Perhaps one had, but somehow Acelynn doubted that.

She turned the envelope over to open it and saw that the fold had been sealed over with red wax and had an imprint of a bare tree on it. The letter was fairly heavy – for a bunch of paper – weighed down with secrets. Acelynn slowly peeled the wing of the envelope from the body and pulled the many papers of the letter out.

Taking a deep breath, she unfolded the papers and took a quick glance at the writing. The paper was the same color as the old envelope but written in a different blue pen.

Dear Acelynn,

The first thing I have to say is that I am truly sorry for what I did last night. I have no idea what came over me. It’s not your fault for anything I do, and this situation just further proves how much I don’t even deserve such an angel as you.

It was an hour later – and yes I did hear you crying, but I’m just so much of a coward to go back to the basement that soon after my mistake – I went back downstairs to talk. But you were already passed out on the couch with Luke. I turned off the stereo, so don’t worry about that.

Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that by the time you read this, or perhaps even by the time you wake up, I will be gone. I’m not trying to be dramatic or a fucking prissy princess, but that is the cold hard truth. I am gone. I wish I had the balls to tell it to your face but I don’t. So I guess I am forced to tell you this way.

I’m on my way to North Carolina right now. I took my father’s car and a few things. My mother has family over there and I think I’m going to try and stay there for awhile, if they’ll have me. It will take at least a few days or maybe a week to get there, but that’s where I’ll be. I’m not sure if you really want to know this or even care, but you at least deserve some explanations for my actions if I can give them. Even before you were in the picture, this was already the plan for me.

You asked me awhile ago why my father and I were fighting that one time. I told you when the time came you and Luke would both find out. Well, the time has come.

Brian has decided to move his company elsewhere. Somewhere far away. In Asia, in fact. Japan to be even more specific. It’s always been a small plan for him to move there. For at least three years the idea had been entertained in my household. I always thought it would be exotic and exciting to move to Japan.

So now Brian and Luke will be moving to Japan to live there so Brian can run his company. But this is all without you. Luke doesn’t know anything about this right now. He doesn’t even know that he’s moving. I don’t have to go because I’m nineteen now and I’m no longer under his custody. But Luke is very well under his custody. Even if Brian doesn’t like his kid, there is no way in hell he would ever give that up. He likes the power too much.

I have to ask you never to tell my father where I am. It was always the plan for me to go along with him to wherever. We fight all the time but he constantly believes that I would follow him to the ends of the world, even if he treats me so shitty. I can’t take Luke with me because Brian would find a way to find him and drag him back kicking and screaming. Besides, I don’t think Luke would even think of coming with me. He loves Dad way too much.

Just so you know I didn’t plan on letting you just wither away in this run-down town with your psycho mother. Once we got together I decided to bring you with me to North Carolina when Brian and Luke moved to Japan.

But now I can see that it would never work out.

I am too much of a little fucker and a screw up to keep you safe and happy. I also know that for you, living in a world without Luke would be a living nightmare. And I couldn’t dare make myself put you in that situation. I know that Luke loves you very much and that you too love him. I know that he saved you from a depression that he had once faced himself. I know that you brought happiness and joy to his life. So no, I cannot dare split you apart. I can’t do anything about Luke’s move to Japan, though. And because of my cowardly self I can only wish you the best of luck in this endeavor.

This letter is coming to an end. All I have left to say is that I do truly love you. And if you need someone you can look up the name ‘Rosemary Collins’ in the phone book for North Carolina. That’s my aunt’s name. But don’t worry; I won’t be offended if you never call.
I suppose this is goodbye then, I guess.

With deep apology and love,

Yours truly,

Tuck Spencer

Acelynn took a deep, shaky breath. Tuck was gone. Luke would be gone soon enough. And she would be left alone once again. Yet somehow, with Tuck gone, she somehow felt liberated. A little more free. Somehow, she knew that she couldn’t be with him forever. He wasn’t grounded enough for her. She needed someone a little more stable.

Without thinking, Acelynn put the papers down on her bed and left the room. She went out to the entry way and pulled on her shoes without her socks. She grabbed Luke’s car keys from the key hook next to the door.

It was spontaneous – and not to mention illegal. She didn’t even have her driver’s permit or license. But she had to go. She had to go see him and tell the truth.

Acelynn opened the rusty truck from the side of the road and got in. It took awhile to start it, but eventually she got it. The ballerina didn’t know everything about a stick shift, but she had watched Luke enough to know the basics.

Acelynn began to drive erratically, but at least she was moving. It wouldn’t take long, anyway, to get to her house.

She had to tell her father about Dana. Acelynn had to tell him and she had to tell him now.