A Lesson Learnt

"Mike? Are you awake"?

"No."

"I have to get going."

"What time is it?"

"Six thirty."

"It's still the middle of the night!"

"No Mike. It's early morning and I have to get going before John goes to work---"

"Where will you tell him you were?"

"I'll tell him I stopped over at my friend Elizabeth's house---"

"Ok. Call me later and tell me what happens between the two of you."

"No problem."

"Umm---KISS!"

Tiffany laughed and walked back towards the bed and allowed Mike to kiss her sweetly. "Now go," he commanded, pointing to the door.

Tiffany smiled to herself as Mike quickly fell back to sleep. "Bye," she whispered. "I miss you already."

---

It was noon before Mike resurfaced again. Groggy and stiff, he made his way into his kitchen and poured himself some coffee. Yawning as he sat at the kitchen table, he found himself thinking back to the previous night.

It had been a long while since he had shared a bed with another female. He and his wife Ana had divorced six years previous and the only women he had slept with since then had been groupies or strippers. And even then he was in short supply. It seemed like no woman wanted him like she wanted Billie or Tre.

To stop himself from wallowing, he quickly averted his thoughts back to Tiffany. And as he did, a sudden yearning rolled in the pit of his stomach. He was actually missing her. When she was around he forgot all about his troubled past. When she smiled at him it felt like he needn't have a care in the world. When he thought about the way they kissed, his insides tingled with a happiness that he wasn't familiar with. Well, actually he was, but he only ever recalled feeling the way he did now once, when he and Ana were together.

He had loved Ana more than he loved himself, and now he was feeling the same emotions for Tiffany. 'Nah I don't love her,' he said aloud to himself. 'How could I? Its not like we're together or anything.' But the longer he sat and contemplated, the stronger the feeling inside of him became. He could have sworn that his heart beat faster every time he thought about her; he knew it did when they were together.

"This is stupid," he said to no one. "I do not love Tiffany. I cannot love Tiffany. Nor will I ever love Tiffany."

"Who are you trying to kid?" a voice suddenly said.

"Jesus Billie! Are you trying to kill me?"

"No. Just trying to make you see sense."

Mike frowned at his friend. "I can see sense. I don't do love any more."

"Sure you do!"

"Holy cow Bill---did you come here for a reason or just to annoy me?"

"Oh my God! You think I'm annoying?" Billie let out a girlish cry and pretended to sob against the wall.

"Aaw come on Billie you know I don't mean it," Mike went along with his act. "You know I love you really---"

Billie peered out from under his arm. "You said you didn't do love---and you can't love me AND Tiffany."

Mike sighed, exasperated. "Who says I love Tiffany?"

"Me."

"You?"

"Yup."

"You're an idiot."

"Tell me something I don't already know Mike. But really yeah---you LURVE her!"

Mike stood rooted to his spot as Billie skipped around him in a circle.

"You really like her! You think she's sexy! You want to kiiiiss her! You really lurrrve her!"

"I think I've entered the twilight zone," Mike chuckled as Billie wrapped his arms around himself and made kissing noises.

"Why Adrienne fell in love with you I'll never know---"

"Coz I've got a huuuuge---" Billie paused for dramatic effect. "Bank balance."

Mike and Billie then laughed until their sides hurt. "Seriously now," Billie quickly said. "You love Tiffany."

"Stop it. I don't."

"Mikey---as your best friend of too many years I say that you are in love with her."

"I say that I am not."

"You are too."

"Are not!"

"Are too!"

"Are not!"

"Are not!"

"Are too!"

"There! There! You admitted it!"

"You tricked me you bastard!"

"Hey, I have two young boys! I learn a lot from them!"

Mike stood quietly for a moment, before he pushed past Billie to go into his living room, where he sat quiet for a few minutes more. "I can't help it," he whispered finally.

"I know buddy. You can't help who you fall for."

"But the thing is--- I don't even think she feels the same way."

"And why's that?"

"Coz she's got a boyfriend who she'll openly admit to loving. And I see no signs from her that she feels the same way I do."

"You know what Mike---balls to everything. Balls to her boyfriend. Balls to the signs, or lack of them. Balls to all your doubts and worries. She adores you man, and if you of all people can't see that, then---I'll be damned to spend my life in hell."

"You're already going to hell---"

"Don't change the subject---"

"I'm telling you Bill---I get the feeling she's in this for sex and sex only."

Billie punched his friend in the arm "Now YOU'RE the idiot!"

"Ouch! But excuse me---?"

"Well, if you think that poorly of her then you really are an idiot. I can see she cares for you. ADRIENNE could see that she cares for you. It seems to me like you're the one holding back. Let yourself go Mike---stop worrying over shitty little signs or shitty little boyfriends. At the end of the day YOU are the one she calls at the end of every night regardless of who she is with. YOU are the first person she calls when she's upset. And YOU were the first person she felt like seeing yesterday after she and her boyfriend had a fight. So if you don't class that as love then ---you're a fucktard."

Mike sat silently looking at his hands, digesting everything Billie had just said. He hated it when Billie had a point.

"Well maybe I like being a fucktard---" Mike mumbled quietly in defeat.

"What's that?" Joyful victory coloured Billie's tone

"I said, maybe I like being a fucktard!"

"So in other words you mean---Billie you are right and I am wrong. I love Tiffany and she loves me. You are the king of everything---"

"Yes Billie---that is what I meant."

"Great, I'm glad we've got that sorted. Now, all this greatness has made me hungry---what're you cooking me?"

Mike turned to Billie and raised a sceptical eyebrow. "You may have won me Armstrong, but don't push your luck!"

"Yeah but Miiiike---I prefer your cheese on toast to ANYTHING Adrienne cooks! Please, please, please do me some!"

Billie gave Mike his best set of puppy dog eyes. "Fine ok! You win---"

"Again---"

"Yes Billie, again." Mike sighed in defeat and began making his way to the kitchen. Stopping at the living room door, he turned back to look at Billie.

"I love you man," he told him.

"I love you too Mike. Now please go and do us some lunch."

"Yes sir!"

Mike smiled and went on to do the task in hand. He did love Billie and he had no doubt in his mind that without him, he'd be lying in a ditch somewhere. Or he would be so bitter and twisted that he'd be incapable of loving anyone. And of course, it was because of Billie that he had met Tiffany--