Kill Me.

Callum smiled as Lee rattled on about his latest inspiration for a new story, eyes lighting up in excitement about the idea. For once, the mindless chatter of someone didn’t actually bother or annoy him. Instead he found it entertaining, something he liked. He told himself it was simply polite interest but even he knew that wasn’t the truth. Callum was genuinely interested in Lee’s stories, or anything really.

“So, what do you think? It isn’t as extreme as my murder story but still… It’d be nice to have something a little different. People need to see that we need better transportation. There are ten year olds riding buses with seventy-year-old women and 40-year-old child molesters. It’s wrong!” Lee exclaimed, sounding angry though Callum knew it was just his passion for the subject. Callum nodded accordingly, agreeing. The story didn’t sound all that interesting for reading but he had faith in Lee’s ability to hook people in. “How would your parents feel about that? Like, you know, if you were living here when you were a kid?”

“I wouldn’t leave my house,” Callum said, scoffing. “Dad was killed in a car accident and mom’s been crazy paranoid ever since. I almost thought she was going to homeschool me and my sister.”

“Oh… I’m sorry Callum,” Lee said, sincere and looking genuinely upset about his loss. Callum raised an eyebrow.

“Not your fault. Besides, it was forever ago. I don’t even really remember him.”

“But Callum, he was your dad! You have to care that he-“

“Lee, I told you. I’m not a nice person. I know how I’m supposed to feel. I just don’t.” Callum regretted his tone instantly when Lee fell silent but the boy offered a small smile.

“You don’t have to feel anything specific. No one can tell you how you’re supposed to feel,” he said before they fell into a comfortable silence, Callum thinking over the words.

As they turned their attention to the TV, Callum snuck glances at Lee, still so shocked by the boy. He couldn’t remember a time when someone had actually enjoyed being with him, just because. There was always another motive, always, but Lee was so innocent, so authentic that Callum didn’t doubt his honesty. He had just pulled his eyes from the boy when he popped up from the sofa, grinning at Callum.

“Dishes!” He took Callum’s plate and his own before heading for the kitchen. Callum followed obligingly, grabbing their two cups of coffee. The dishes appeared to be the only thing that escaped Lee’s frantic cleaning, as there seemed to be about a good day’s worth of empty plates and silverware. The boy immediately started the water, letting it get hot.

“So how’re you?” Lee asked Callum, smiling. “How’s life?”

“It’s… It’s good,” Callum said with a brief smile. It really was too, with Lee’s excitement always permeating everything in the office ad his avoidance of his mother and sister. Lee nodded with a grin, looking content as he started on the dishes.

It took a while to finish but finally Callum was hanging up his dishtowel and Lee was draining the sink. At least everything was put away, the kitchen looking just as pristine as the rest of the house.

When Lee turned back to face him Callum chuckled, seeing a group of bubbles resting on the boy’s cheek. Lee frowned, looking confused. Without thinking Callum reached forward to brush the soap from the boy’s face, realizing only after his finger was brushing against Lee’s tender cheek what he was doing. Lee’s smile softened, becoming almost neutral as Callum leaned forward. Maybe in another life, Callum would have known just what that pleasantly surprised look in the younger man’s eyes meant but instead he just fought a blush and stepped back. He missed the flash of disappointment on the writer’s face.

“I-You had soap… On your cheek,” Callum said quickly, explaining. “Sorry.”

“No, no it’s fine. Thanks,” Lee said with a dazed smile. “Thanks for all this.”

“Of course. I should probably get going. I’ve been here all day,” Callum realized and Lee nodded.

“You really have. I’ll walk you out,” he said, leading Callum to the door and opening for him. “I’ll see you later.”

“Bye Lee. Call if you need anything,” Callum told him and Lee nodded, promising he would. Just as Callum started to walk away Lee let out a quiet curse, soft fingertips closing around Callum’s solid wrist.