Cover Me

The minute Frenzy jumped into my cab, I knew he’d done his job. In his very own weird way of speaking, he said that this Witwicky boy had the map to the All Spark. Of all the things to find the human on, was eBay, e-freaking-Bay! How ridiculous… Frenzy found out that the map was imprinted on a pair of glass lens; apparently used to help humans with their vision. I believe they’re called “glasses.” The boy was known on eBay as “Ladiesman217.” Hah! How un-original, I could have come up with a better username; maybe something along the lines of “Con-Artist.”

I pulled out of the airport and set off toward the boy’s hometown. When I arrived, I had first made my way to his housing quarters, or “house” as the humans liked to call it. His address was hardly a challenge to acquire, the internet, as useful as it may be, had the weakest firewalls I have ever encountered. I came to the house and turned on my infrared. There were only two life forms inside; one was an aged human, most likely the father figure. The other being was small, very small. It was a canine; I believe it was called a “Chihuahua.”

I didn’t realize at first that it was the middle of the day, and he would most likely be out with his companions, and that I would have to search for him. With Frenzy in my holding chamber, I chose to scout out the town, looking for any signs that the boy might be there. All things aside, I was pretty satisfied with my alternate form. It was known as a Saleen Mustang Police Cruiser, and I could use it to avoid almost any traffic without trouble.

I was about to turn the corner when a female human on one of those accursed electric scooters, Vespas, I believe, had nearly ridden in front of me, causing me to stop abruptly. I couldn’t care less about the human, but I did not wish to bring any unwanted attention to myself and cause a stir. I could hear Frenzy complain about being tossed around in my holding chamber, but I told him to shut up and that it was necessary. The female scowled, clearly annoyed, but I only smirked and continued on.

Soon enough, I found the boy on a two-wheeled metal device, a bicycle, quickly pedaling down the rode, but the funny part was that the bike was pink! Certainly not a color you would expect someone with the nickname of “Ladiesman217” to have. I could spare a small laugh, couldn’t I?

He was pedaling fast, constantly looking over his shoulder as if scared of something. I didn’t sense any other Decepticons in the area, so what could he be running from? Another human? A closer look and I noticed a yellow car with black racing stripes. Now who could that be? It reminded me of someone but I couldn’t quite place what, or who, it was. I didn’t have much time to wonder about it when Ladiesman217, or Sam, as his profile says, rode under a bridge in an old car lot.

I took my chance, and drove in through the back entrance. The boy noticed me, and made his way as quickly as he could to my vehicle form, not sensing any danger. How naïve. I abruptly opened my door, making him crash along with the bike into said car door. I shut the door and watched his reaction. He stood up, oblivious to the fact that I just intentionally damaged him. He began calling out to my “driver.”

“Officer, officer! I’m so glad you’re here! You see, I was chased here by my car on my mother’s bike. S-so get out of the car!” He began pounding on my hood, which really pissed me off. Might as well have some fun while I’m at, huh?

I pushed forward, stopping and going, stopping and going, no doubt scaring the slag out of the boy. As much fun as it was, Megatron would have my aft if I didn’t complete my mission because I was having “fun.”

“W-woah! What are you…” He trailed off when I activated my scanner, bringing it closer and closer to his head, just in case this wasn’t the boy. He was backing up, so I had to push my scanner forward even more than was necessary.

Once the scan was completed, it was confirmed that this was indeed Sam, or Ladiesman217. So, I transformed on the spot; the boy on the other hand looked like he was scared shitless. To my surprise, the boy ran. It was shown that most humans froze in shock when faced with most near-death or horrific experiences. And this probably counts as a near-death experience. The boy had more wits than I thought. But he was getting away and he knows where the glasses are. I started running after him, he was fast for an insect. I caught up to him, and swatted him. For whatever reason, I winced when he hit the glass of the black compact car he landed on.

I brushed it off as I faced him and demanded, “Are you username: Ladiesman217?!” I had to hold back a chuckle at his facial expression; he looked like he was about lubricate himself.

He looked even more confused, “I don't know what you're talking about!”

I was growing extremely impatient now, I repeated more fiercely, “ARE YOU USERNAME: LADIESMAN217?”

“Yeah...” He responded slowly, eyeing me warily.

Finally! A real response! Thank-slagging-Primus! “Where is the eBay item 2-1-1-5-3!? WHERE ARE THE GLASSES!?” I demanded, hoping to get an answer out of him soon. I took a closer look at him, he had short brown hair, and he looked very average by human standards. I felt something click in my processor and Spark, which was extremely odd. That shouldn’t happen unless it’s a star link… No, that’s impossible, especially because he’s human; I’m probably just imagining it. I highly doubted I would have any personal encounters with the boy in the future. (Ha-ha)

He saw an opening in my moment of confusion, and took his chance to escape. He began running away again, which I could not allow if I wanted Starscream on my aft again, but this time that human female I nearly ran over earlier pulled in under the bridge. Ladiesman217 knocked her off her vehicle to help. I took great joy in stepping on the blue scooter.

The female spoke, “What is your problem, Sam?” She demanded, clearly annoyed.

“Okay, there's a monster, it just attacked me!” He responded oh-so urgently, his voice shaking. I began stomping after them, trying to get to the Sam-boy before he could make his escape. “H-here it comes!” He warned, trying to help the female up. “You have to run!”

I was so close, I was about to grab the boy when I saw a flash of yellow. It was that car that was chasing Ladiesman! It must be an Autobot. Another second later, the yellow ‘bot rammed into my legs, sending me to my knees. Much to my chagrin, the boy and girl both climbed into the car after some hesitation, and began driving away. Rolling to my side, I jumped up and starting running after them, transforming mid-step. I started up my sirens and gave chase, speeding down the road. Their screams of terror were easily heard, screaming, “OH SHIT WE’RE GONNA DIE!!”

Finally, the yellow Autobot jumped through a glass window in a warehouse, landing with a loud thud, and continued driving through the warehouse. He tried moving though obstacles to shake me off, and although I was slightly, dare I say it, impressed at how well he maneuvered through the large warehouse, he was no where compared to me. I was, after all, commander of the Racetrack Patrol, and I sure as hell would not be bested by some measly Autobot and his poor attempt at evasion. He tried sharp turning to confuse me, but it still didn’t work. But when he turned a corner, he disappeared. Where the slag did that bot go?! I chose to move slowly and quietly, trying not to alert the Autobot to my presence.

Wait- was that them? Slowly backing up, I saw them in an alley, I was about to turn to face them when the bot sped forward forcing me to push forward. ‘Slag!’ I mentally cursed as he drove behind me andover the bridge. Then he stopped, dropping the two humans out of his cab. Then he transformed revealing him to be the Autobot… Bumblebee? I thought that color scheme seemed familiar. I get to pummel the Autobit? Wonderful. I sped at him full force transforming at the last second, jumping and tackling him. I stood up and pulled out my flail, releasing Frenzy from my holding chamber. I told him over our comm. link, “Get the boy, he knows where the glasses are.”

“Y-y-yes ‘C-cade. G-g-good l-l-l-luck.”

“I don’t need it. Make sure you don’t fail. I’ll take care of the Bumbling Protection Squad over here.”

“S-s-stubborn a-as a-a-always, h-h-huh?” Frenzy cackled, cutting off the link.

‘Stuttering mech…’ I thought, turning my full attention on the fight that was about to ensue. I doubt I would lose against this… Autobit.

Fifteen minutes later…

‘I should really stop getting so over confident…’ I thought glumly, trying to get up. As much as I tried, I only failed. Slumping, I groaned, “Grah… Slag, that is painful. Who knew the bug could be so strong?! Ugh… ‘Screamer’s gonna kill me… I can’t even move!” Sighing, I stopped struggling and sent out a distress signal to the other Decepticons. I’ll just leave the boy to Frenzy.

“What is it Barricade? Have you acquired the map to the All Spark?”Starscream’s terribly scratchy voice came over the comm.

“Negative, an Autobot attacked me while I was interrogating the boy. I need assistance, I’m heavily damaged.”

“You fail me again, Barricade?! Can’t you do anything right?!”

“Just send the transport, Starscream! I’m losing energy!”

“Tch… I should just leave you there to die. Very well, I will send Blackout to your aid; he will fix your injuries upon arrival.”

“What?! Blackout?! No! No! I told you! It’ll heal on its own! Just send someone else, someone without medical experience to take me back to base!”

“Do you wish to be fully functional again or not?! Blackout is the only medic available at this time.”

“…You’re doing this on purpose, aren’t you?”

“Doing what?” Starscream asked innocently, and then his normal tone of voice came back. “ETA until Blackout arrives at your location: fifteen earth minutes.”

“…Wonderful.”

I probably haven’t mentioned this, but I really hate medics. I mean really hate them. I only go to them when I absolutely have to, and the only medic I trust is my own team’s medic, Groundhog. Even then I’m hesitant to go. And speaking of medics, I heard the sound of a helicopters choppers. Blackout is here. Yippee…

“Barricade, I understand that you are heavily damaged. And I also understand your… phobia of most medics, but if you wish to be fully functional, I suggest you cooperate.”

“Yeah, yeah… get it over with already; I’m close to stasis lock.” At that, Blackout transformed and rushed to my aid.

“Who did you engage?” Blackout inquired, quickly working on my injuries, I kept wincing at every tool he pulled out, no matter how harmless they seem. Medics can be very scary mechs.

“…The Autobit.”

“The who?”

“Bumblebee, the yellow bug.” Blackout paused for a moment, and then went back to work.

“You were defeated by the young Autobot scout? That easily?” Oh I could just hear all the taunts to come in the near future.

“Hey! It wasn’t my fault! The bug was so determined it was scary! The odd thing was that he didn’t speak, which I don’t get. He didn’t even grunt!”

“Didn’t you know?”

“Know what?”

“It’s not like he had a choice if he wanted to speak or not, it’s that he couldn’t speak. At all. Megatron ripped out his vocal processors back on Cybertron at Tyger Pax.”

“How come everyone else knows this but me?! And here I thought the bug was taunting me!”

“You were always out on the road with your squad. No one had the chance.” He chuckled at me. This is another reason why I hate medics. “I’m finished; now that wasn’t so hard, was it? Well, I suppose you didn’t feel any of the pain because your pain receptors were probably off and I did give you that pain killer… No matter, I’ll take you back to base immediately.” He, being larger than I, was able to pick me up with his hook, fly all the way back to the Decepticon base, and drop me from fifty feet in the air, onto the grass field below. Correction- I despised medics; with an even stronger passionthan before.

Starscream allowed me to recharge for the remainder of my recovery so that I am fully operational, he had no missions or use for me during that time, so I guess he thought he could have me out of his way for awhile. Tch… Slagger. Although I hope Frenzy’s okay, I can only hope he succeeded in acquiring those glasses. Soundwave would have my head if my partner died.

Soon enough, I was one-hundred percent fixed, and I was able to escape the base. I took a drive in the city, the one where I chased that Ladiesman boy. Not ten minutes later was it that I received a transmission from Frenzy.

“A-a-a-All Spark located.”

‘Screamer was the first to respond. “This is Starscream: All Decepticons mobilize.”

I was the second. “Barricade, en-route.” I began racing towards my destination, sirens blazing.

“Devastator, reporting.” I never knew his name. Demolisher or Devastator or Brawl or what? I guess now I know.

“Bonecrusher, rolling.” Why the heck is his name Bonecrusher? We don’t even have bones… we didn’t even know what bones even slagging were before we arrived on this dirtball! Just how the slag did he get his name?

“Blackout, incoming.” Yeah, I’m sure you’re incoming, you evil medic. “All hail Megatron!”

We all grouped up on a highway, Blackout was following us from above. I couldn’t help but snicker at our appearance. A tank, a highway police cruiser, a Blackhawk, and… whatever Bonecrusher was, all on an empty desert highway; although we soon joined the more populated highway in the city. A bit later I decided to hang back a bit, staying behind the group in case there was trouble and I could provide back up. I wasn’t really paying attention to my surroundings until I got a comm. request from Blackout.

“What is it, Blackout?” I asked, awaiting his answer.

“Autobots have been detected. Provide a ‘Police Escort’ to decrease amount of traffic.”

“Affirmative, one police escort under way.” Die, evil medic, DIE!

“Be quick about it.” And at that, he shut off the link. Damn medi-copter.

I turned on my sirens and cleared a path for my… teammates. I immediately noticed the Autobit, except he looked a helluva lot less ugly. He actually had a decent alt form, same color scheme though, but it didn’t matter to me. I still needed to provide a police escort. And when I first turned on my sirens, everything went smoothly until an ambulance, a big black truck, and a silver car blocked my path. Then, all of a sudden, Bonecrusher, the moron that he is, transformed. Right there! In the middle of the state highway! That idiot! We aren’t supposed to reveal ourselves unless absolutely necessary! Then the big blue rig with red flames slammed on his breaks, spinning around and transforming. Bonecrusher probably could take care of them; they were nearly of equal size… HOLY FRAG, the big rig was… Optimus Prime! The slagging leader?! He was here?! I’m so slagged. Screw Starscream, I want to live. I immediately turned around, and made my way back to Tranquility; where hopefully I can find refuge and camp out. I know that this is cowardly of me, but sometimes cowards win. And this was one of those times.

I was aware that there was a large battle going on, and so I stayed in the shadows, silently watching the battle that was going on. From Megatron ripping Jazz in half to when Sam, or Ladiesman217, struck the Decepticon leader with the All Spark, overpowering him, and destroying him. The battle was over, and all Decepticons, except Starscream, have all been destroyed. The war was supposedly over, and Starscream set off for the sky,

Five months. It’s been five months since Starscream left the planet. Five months of nothing but BORING. There was nothing to do, of course, terrorizing the humans with pranks and by giving them speeding tickets can help sometimes, but that added to list of BORING after awhile. As I was driving down the state highway, I got the most unexpected thing: a comm. request. The signature was from… Starscream?! He’s back? On Earth? Oh slag. But I accepted it, having nothing better to do.

“Barricade reporting. What do you want ‘Screamer?” I responded, feeling a bit recharge-deprived.

“What do I want… hmm… maybe for my actual soldiers to be on time and actually respond when I send them a request to meet!” To my surprise, he spoke in English, which confused me. Why would he…? Never mind, that’s unimportant.

“What around rambling about now ‘Screamer?” I also responded in English, wondering what has gotten into the seeker’s CPU lately.

“I’m not rambling about anything. Have you not received the coordinates I sent over a week ago?!”

“Coordinates? What… Oh.” I don’t check my mail, so sue me.

“You’d better hurry up, the Constructicons are getting restless.” He said, and resent the coordinates.

Constructicons? He must have brought reinforcements. “Alright, Starscream, I’ll ask questions later. I’ll meet up with you as soon as possible.”

“Good. I have some questions of my own for you to answer as well.” And at that he shut off the link, leaving me to do nothing but go to the location in the coordinates he sent me.

The coordinates were fairly close, they were just a few miles outside of Tranquility, so I made it there easily with my sirens on.

When I arrived, there was a rather large hanger waiting for me. ‘How the slag did they find this place?’ I wondered as I transformed, walking through the hanger door, only to be greeted by Starscream.

“Hello there… Barricade.” He sneered, dragging me farther into the hanger.

“Hey there, Screamer.” I grinned, I haven’t annoyed the mech for five months, and I’m out of practice.

“You’d best be more respectful to your new leader.”

Leader? “Says who?”

“Says the fact that Megatron’s dead, and I’m his second in command, therefore making me the rightful leader.”

“Hmm.” I grunted, I wanted to argue, but I wasn’t really feeling that great. I have a bad feeling that something bad might happen, and I knew to always follow those bad feelings. “Alright, who and where are the new arrivals?”

“In the other hanger. Follow me.” And so I did. When we walked into the other room, I was surprised to see so many mechs; I didn’t expect ‘Screamer to come back with so many. There were his trine, Skywarp and Thundercracker, the constructicons, a few insecticons, only Kickback, Scalpel, and another whose name I always forget. There was also Screamer’s very own worshipper, Misfire, Thrust, and finally, Ramjet. I was disappointed to see that my teammates, Groundhog, Rollerforce, and Motorhead weren’t in the small group of cons that had recently arrived. I couldn’t help but hope, right? They’ve become like my family.

“So, Barricade, where have you been since the battle in Mission City?” Starscream asked casually, knowing I had no good answer for it. “I had thought that you were destroyed after Prime took out Bonecrusher.”

“Well, I uh…” Damn, I had no excuse. He’s so gonna slag me.

“I know you have no excuse for that. I know you escaped before the actual battle even started.” Whoops, my secret’s out. I’m definitely gonna get slagged.

“Uh, yeah, about that…”

“Save it. I don’t need to hear any excuses. I should kill you right now for abandoning your comrades-” I opened my mouth to plead my defense; but he cut me off. “-But you may redeem yourself.”

“…How?” It wasn’t like ‘Screamer to give second chances.

“Give me the address of the boy, Sam Witwicky.”

“Why?” I questioned, feeling oddly protective all of a sudden.

“That is none of your concern.” Then, he paused, an inquisitive look on his features. “Though, you deserve to know if you are giving me his whereabouts. You should know that we will deal to him much pain. The soldiers you see here are rather irked, to say at the least, that our great leader, Megatron, is dead. They grow restless, and so I must appease them in however I see fit. And what I see fit, Barricade, is that the boy would be theirs to torture.”

I pondered this, why shouldn’t I just give him the boy’s address? It would mean nothing to me, he was just one human among billions. But why did I feel a strange tug at my Spark? Like it was telling me otherwise? Processor versus Spark, always a hard one to choose between. What did I use when I given the choice to join the Decepticons, survival instinct. It was only logical that if I wanted to survive, I would have to join the Decepticons. So I went with my processor. When I was to choose my team, I went with my Spark. My Spark chose them, my team, my allies… my friends. So I was split between logic… and Spark. My processor raced with pros and cons, and before I could catch myself, I found myself saying, “No.”

The entire room seemed to go still.

“…What did you say, Barricade?” Starscream all but hissed in my face.

Well, Spark it is then! “I said ‘no’, ‘Screamer. I will not give you the boy’s whereabouts.” I’m definitely gonna get slagged now.

“You refuse to give me the boy’s whereabouts!?” Hmm, he seemed to have a habit of repeating what others just told him in question form. “Have you gone soft for humans, Barricade!? Or do you just consider the fleshy your own pathetic little pet? I will NOT tolerate defiance, Barricade!”

“Pet? N- Oh slag!” I didn’t get to finish my sentence as I ducked when he swung his servo at me, I myself beginning to pull out my flail. He shot at me with his null rays, blasting me into the wall, crashing me through it and landing outside. I only managed to grunt before he charged at me again. Deciding it was my time to escape; I transformed, and sped off at full speed. I turned on my scanners and nearly jumped at how close he was. He was literally twenty feet above me in jet mode. He transformed, and before I got the chance to do so or speed up, he landed on top of my form, pounding on my hood, front and rear bumper, windows, everything. He blasted me with all his cannons and rays, ready to full-on kill me. I was in car mode, so the best I could do was turn on my mini-gun, which he easily ripped off. He picked me up and started up his thrusters, flying around while shooting at me. I think he was going a little overboard, don’t you think? But slag, this hurt so much; I could just feel myself slipping into stasis lock. Finally, I guess he got tired, he dropped me. He slagging dropped me! From a thousand feet in the air no less! There were dents all over me, I couldn’t even transform! I shut off most pain receptors, and as the ground got closer, I recognized the area as Tranquility. Funny how things happen, right? Luckily, (if you count this situation as lucky, which I highly doubt) I landed on large pile of soft cushions, I believe the humans slept on them and called them “mattresses”. I easily bounced off of them and landed with a loud “thud.”

I was on alert for at least ten earth minutes, making sure that Starscream left and didn’t linger around to make sure I was really dead. I allowed myself to finally relax, slowly bringing back online what was still functional. As my first pain receptor turned on, I could feel an immense pain fill that area. The process continued as I brought back online each pain receptor, when I could feel again, I attempted transforming. A failed experiment. The damned Seeker put so many dents in me I couldn’t even transform! As if to just piss me off even more, a warning voice came up, stating, “WARNING: STASIS LOCK IMINENT. BEGINNING LOCK IN 5, 4, 3-” I overrided the warning, quickly going through my options. How can I get help and be able to continue functioning afterwards? Go back to the Decepticons? No way, the way Starscream was just attacking me; it felt he was really trying to kill me. Staying here is out of the question, so that only leaves… not joining, but forming an alliance with the Autobots. There’s no way they would allow an audience with me, not with the trigger-happy buffoon with them. Unless… the boy! Sam Witwicky… he can help me, I’ll ask him to tell the Autobot leader what I need… at least I’ll be a safe distance away from Mr. Trigger-Happy and I would be able to make the alliance without adding insult to injury.

Now… how to get into contact with him… It’s the middle of the day, so he would most likely be at his educational facility. School, I think. Luckily it’s only about a quarter of a mile away from here. As soon as I arrived I scanned the parking lot for the boy’s, I could only guess, guardian, Bumblebee. Either I’m just lucky or Primus is looking out for me because, to my surprise, the bug wasn’t there. I slowly pulled into the parking lot, and parked in an empty space near the entrance, not caring what the humans thought of my beat up form. And again, much to my chagrin, the Stasis Lock warning came up again. “WARNING: STASIS LOCK IMINENT. BEGINNING LOCK IN 5, 4, 3-” I overrided the warning, again, as I watched the teenage humans shuffle out of the large building once a bell had rung. I sat there, watching for a boy with brown hair in the crowd, hoping he would comply with my requests…